things to write in a scholarship essay

5 Ways to Make Your Scholarship Essay Stand Out

A well-crafted essay can potentially win students thousands of dollars in scholarships, experts say.

Make Your Scholarship Essay Stand Out

Getty Images

Applying for scholarships means starting early and writing strong essays.

Key Takeaways

• Start writing essays early to allow time for research and editing.
• Grab the reader's attention immediately with a compelling story.
• Answer questions directly with sound grammar and style.

It's no secret college is expensive . One way to alleviate the cost burden is through scholarships , a form of financial aid that doesn't need to be repaid. Scholarships can range from a few hundred dollars to several thousand dollars, but winning them requires strong credentials and a well-crafted essay.

With so many components to the college application , experts say it's common for students to rush through certain parts. But applying for scholarships and writing strong essays should receive careful attention, experts say.

"A scholarship can mean the difference between graduating debt-free or accumulating substantial student loans," says Liz Doe Stone, president of Top Tier Admissions, an admissions consulting company. "The financial relief can also provide more freedom in choosing a career path without the pressure of loan repayments and open up other professional opportunities, since (scholarships) look great on a resume and may facilitate networking opportunities."

Students should approach scholarship applications and essays as if they're applying for a job, says Haley Lindsey, director of financial aid at Missouri Western State University .

"Essentially, you’re trying to obtain money,” says Lindsey, whose role also includes reviewing scholarship applications. "When you’re writing your essay, be professional. You want to put your best foot forward."

Here are five ways students can make their scholarship essays stand out.

Start Early

Scholarships will set deadlines throughout the year, but experts say a majority – especially local scholarships – typically set deadlines from January through April of a student's senior year. Regardless of the deadline, experts agree on when to start writing essays: the sooner the better, as procrastination typically leads to poor writing.

"It's critical to give yourself enough time to research, write, revise and seek expert feedback," Stone says. "Your final draft should clearly make the case that your goals align with the scholarship's mission and values, and this process takes time."

Students can save a lot of time by pre-writing and reusing essays, but they should be prepared to carefully tailor them to the specific school or organization awarding the scholarship, experts say.

Pre-writing essays can be especially useful for students applying for a high number of scholarships. If students try to write a unique essay for every scholarship, there’s a chance they could experience burnout, which could negatively affect the quality of their essays, says Bethany Hubert, financial aid specialist and manager of high school partnerships at Going Merry, a free scholarship application platform.

"I would much rather a student have two or three essays in their pocket that they’re super confident about, that they spent hours on over the summer and can use again," she says.

Craft a Strong Opening

Scholarship committees often sift through hundreds of applications and essays – or more. The ones that stand out capture the reader's attention from the start with a strong hook that creates curiosity in the reader's mind, says Andrew Simpson, editorial director for College Essay Guy, which offers coaching on college admissions and essay writing.

The following example from an "open topic" prompt shows this well, he says.

Fedora? Check. Apron? Check. Tires pumped? Check. Biking the thirty-five minutes each evening to the cafe and back to work a six-hour shift was exhausting, but my family’s encouragement and gratitude for the extra income was worth it.

This opening "clearly sets up the experience and stakes that drive the essay forward, but again does so relatively succinctly," Simpson says.

Introductions like this, which drop the reader into the action through an anecdote or personal story, tend to be effective and persuade the reader to keep reading, Stone says.

"Remember, the classic advice to 'show, not tell' is key," she says. "Use descriptive language to paint a picture and immerse your reader in the action."

Tell Your Story

Committees want to see how students are able to connect their personal achievements to their future goals and how the scholarship will help them achieve them. Committees don't need applicants to be "level 10/10 vulnerable," Simpson says, "but a lot of strong scholarship essays we’ve seen include moments or details that make us feel connected to the students, that make us root for them."

Students can do this is by sharing their personal story. For example, Hubert says she won several scholarships by writing about her journey as a first-generation college student . Sharing such background allows scholarship committees to understand an applicant at a deeper level.

One student Hubert worked with wrote a scholarship-winning essay about attending college despite her parents not doing so, explaining how she plans to forge her own path.

Everyone makes mistakes, but it is those who learn from their mistakes who are successful. I am learning from their mistakes. Where they got stumped, I find a way to get over. Where they may have stumbled, I continue to run. I have to keep running for my goals in life. Even after reaching my goal I will continue to strive towards greatness. People use the saying, “the sky is the limit,” but it isn’t.

"This made me feel something, and it resonated with me on a personal level," Hubert says. "Statements that are direct, clear and evoke an emotion are great for essays asking you to discuss a personal experience."

Authenticity is important to scholarship committees, so applicants should focus on what makes them "a uniquely deserving candidate for this award," rather than what they think the committee wants to hear, says Carolyn Pippen, a college admissions counselor at admissions consulting firm IvyWise.

"A great essay about a seemingly mundane or 'unimpressive' topic that helps the reader understand you more clearly will always be more effective than a generic, surface-level response about a more 'exciting' topic," Pippen wrote in an email.

Be cautious of tone, however. While applicants don't want to come across as arrogant, they should sound confident in their essays and still be the main character in their story, Stone says.

"It’s easy to write an essay about a meaningful mentor, family member or friend," she says, "but these details distract from what the scholarship committee wants to know about: you! An effective scholarship essay will highlight your achievements and/or discuss the challenges you have overcome through concrete experiences that make your essay more memorable."

Answer Prompts Directly and Thoroughly

Scholarship essays vary in length, but in many cases students have around 500 words to share their message. Some essay prompts are open-ended, but most ask very specific questions. Applicants should read the prompt thoroughly and directly address what it's asking.

Lindsey says she occasionally reads essays where applicants don’t fully answer the prompt or even leave some blank.

“If you can’t answer all the questions, then why should I reward you?” she asks.

Since the runway for most scholarship essays is so short, students need to get to the point immediately and efficiently tell the story, focusing one or two solid examples to directly answer the question, Pippen says. Hubert says students should use the AEC formula to get their point across quickly: assertion, evidence, then commentary.

Students should have someone proofread their completed essay without knowledge of the prompt, Hubert says. If the reader can discern what the prompt was only by reading the essay, the student will know they answered the question directly.

"A lot of times, people who are writing miss that and they end up writing a really good essay, but it has nothing to do with the prompt or it dances around it," she says.

Use Strong and Sound Writing

While students may be lax when text messaging with friends, that style of writing should not carry over to scholarship essays. Using shorthand, slang or improper sentence structure, grammar or punctuation is a surefire way to lose credibility in the eyes of essay readers, experts say.

"It is very common and I see it a lot of the time where instead of saying ‘you,’ students put ‘u,’" Lindsey says. “That’s a huge turnoff to scholarship committees. If you can’t take the two extra seconds to put in the two extra letters, that’s not a good essay, to me. They don’t have to be a phenomenal writer, but if they’re not giving me the full word or (if they're) using that texting language, it’s an automatic out for me."

Such writing also typically signals a lack of time spent crafting the essay. Successful essays undergo multiple drafts and edits to ensure strong writing, Simpson says.

Example of a Scholarship-Winning Essay

The following excerpt, used with permission from Stone, comes from an essay that won a student a scholarship.

This prompt asked applicants how their course of study will contribute to their future career and why they chose that path.

By studying Spanish language and Latin American history in college, I plan to pursue a career that will allow me to advocate for immigrants and refugees. Since I plan to study in the United States, I am specifically interested in helping the Mexican-American immigrant community by creating lesson plans for schools that will teach students about immigrants’ struggles and educating people about the laws that will resolve injustices.

The applicant goes on to explain what they've already done to gain experience and knowledge in this field, including creating an app that educates people on bills being passed or voted on that pertain to immigrants' rights within their state. The applicant then mentions a class they took at Brown University in Rhode Island where the final project was an infographic highlighting the challenges immigrants face and what U.S. citizens can do to help.

The essay closes:

This project helped me to realize that I could be interested in a career in law or social services that will allow me to work directly with the immigrant community to address their needs.

"This scholarship essay effectively articulates the student's post-college goals and how these goals are rooted in their specific high school experiences and accomplishments," Stone says. "By linking their intended course of study to their advocacy for immigrants and refugees, they demonstrate both a strong commitment to community activism and a practical understanding of the challenges faced by immigrants. This alignment of past experiences with future aspirations – as well as their sincere dedication to making a positive impact through their chosen field – resonated with the scholarship committee."

Trying to fund your education? Get tips and more in the U.S. News  Paying for College  center.

Facts About Merit Aid Scholarships

Tags: education , scholarships , paying for college , students

2025 Best Colleges

Search for your perfect fit with the U.S. News rankings of colleges and universities.

College Admissions: Get a Step Ahead!

Sign up to receive the latest updates from U.S. News & World Report and our trusted partners and sponsors. By clicking submit, you are agreeing to our Terms and Conditions & Privacy Policy .

Ask an Alum: Making the Most Out of College

You May Also Like

What to know about opt.

Anayat Durrani Oct. 24, 2024

We Can Help Struggling College Students

Brian Bridges Oct. 23, 2024

Colleges That Enroll the Most Transfers

Cole Claybourn Oct. 22, 2024

What Not to Wear on Halloween in College

Sarah Wood Oct. 22, 2024

Best Value Out-of-State Public Schools

Decide Whether to Retake the GMAT

Anna Fiorino Oct. 21, 2024

Colleges With Cheap Out-of-State Tuition

Cole Claybourn Oct. 21, 2024

See Average Student Loan Debt Change

Sarah Wood Oct. 21, 2024

How to Study Real Estate Online

Anayat Durrani Oct. 16, 2024

Backing Out of Early Decision

Sarah Wood Oct. 16, 2024

*** Enter the $2,000 College Transitions No Essay Scholarship Contest ***

How to Write a Scholarship Essay (with Examples)

September 27, 2023

While applying to college, many students are faced with an additional, daunting task: how to write a scholarship essay. Financial need, already a sensitive subject, can become a stressful factor in the process alongside other existential unknowns. Luckily, scholarship essays will not require you to go tiptoeing around the taboo topic of money. Furthermore, most scholarship essay prompts more or less resemble standard supplemental essay questions. The trick then is to make your scholarship essay stand out. The following article and scholarship essay example will offer up pointers for anyone striving to win a college scholarship.

Organizing Scholarship Essays by Prompt

You may feel like melting into a lump of despair when facing a browser full of tabbed scholarships. The best way to avoid getting overwhelmed is to organize and analyze a list of prompts. Why? Because your first goal is not simply to figure out how to write a scholarship essay. Rather, you’ll want to know how to save time while writing complex and relevant scholarship essays.

As you look over the various prompts, you’ll notice that some sound fairly open-ended, while others ask for something quite specific. In response, you should annotate each prompt with thematic keywords. This will help you figure out when you can use the same essay for several prompts.

Your annotated list may look something like the following…

Sample Scholarship Essay Prompts

1) “Explain something that made a big impact in your life.”

• Keywords: event , personal development, growth, background

2) “We’re committed to diversifying education abroad by providing funding to students who are typically under-represented in study abroad. Please describe how you and/or your plans for study abroad could be viewed as under-represented.”

• Keywords: minority, diversity, identity, study abroad

3) “Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.”

• Keywords: background, identity, interest, talent

Sample Scholarship Essay Prompts, Continued

4) “Please explain a personal hardship or catastrophic life event that you have experienced. How did you manage to overcome this obstacle? What did you learn and how did you grow from it?”

• Keywords: event, personal development, growth, challenge, background

5) Describe a change you would like to make in the world. Tell us about how you would plan to make that change, and what obstacles you might encounter along the way.

• Keywords: world development, challenge, future

6) “Tell us three things that are important to you. How did you arrive at this list? Will these things be important to you in ten years? Why?”

• Keywords: background, values, interest, development, identity, future

Scholarship Essay Prompts ( Continued)

7) “What does it mean to you to be part of a minority community? What challenges has it brought and how have you overcome them? What are the benefits?”

• Keywords: minority, community, challenge, growth

8) “Please explain how your experience volunteering and participating in community service has shaped your perspective on humanity. Elaborate on how these experiences have influenced your future ambitions and career choice.”

• Keywords: community service, humanity, community, background, future, values, career

9) “Discuss in your essay any challenges or obstacles you have dealt with and overcome in life and how this will help you succeed in college and beyond. Describe how volunteer, community service or extra-curricular activities have shaped who you are today and what it has taught you. May also include future educational plans and career goals.”

• Keywords: challenge, future, community service, interests, value, personal growth, career

How to Write a Scholarship Essay through Prompt Analysis

Let’s compare some prompts by keywords. You’ll notice that some prompts have a lot of overlap, such as prompts 1 and 4. Both have event, personal development, growth, and background as keywords . Prompt 4 includes the additional keyword challenge . This prompt explicitly asks you to explain how you have “overcome” a “personal hardship or catastrophic life event.” While prompt 1 is not so specific, it would be easy, even natural, to include this narrative arc in your response. This means depicting how you faced the thing that “made a big impact in your life.” In other words, these two essay prompts, though worded differently, allow you to tell the same story.

Other prompts provide potential overlap. In this case, it’s up to you to find and interpret these moments. You may consider the values, strengths, interests, and experiences you wish to relate. For example, prompts 7, 8, and 9 all mention community through different approaches. While prompt 7 focuses on one’s past involvement in a minority community, prompts 8 and 9 are more future-facing, and don’t mention minorities.

Scholarship Essay Examples (Continued)

Here, your best strategy involves answering prompts 8 and 9 together in a single scholarship essay. To do so, the essay would need to detail “a challenge or obstacle you have dealt with” (9) which has thus “shaped your perspective on humanity” (8). This narrative arc will thus inform your “future” educational and career plans (8 and 9). Note that prompt 9 allows you to mention extra-curriculars. However, I wouldn’t recommend it, since this would make your essay less relevant to prompt 8. After your essay is written, adapt it to align with prompt 7. Consider condensing the part about the future into one final sentence and focusing more on minority aspects of your community.

How to Scholarship Essay Avoid Burnout

The above tactic will allow you to avoid burnout by strategizing your essay approach ahead of time. In turn, you’ll be able to maximize your efforts from the get-go. You’ll also likely find that your essays become more complex and nuanced when you consider several prompts at once.

The next step involves editing. Refer back to the prompt, once you have a draft written. Ask yourself, did I answer the question fully? Do I need to edit this essay further to emphasize a particular point? Do I need to cut the essay down to fit a new word count? Contrarily do I need to bulk it up? If so, are there other essays in my portfolio from which I can borrow material? Strategic editing will allow you to respond to a large number of essays during peak essay-writing season.

Finally, you’ll notice that most essays require a word count between 250 to 600 words. It’s often easier to write a longer essay first. This will allow you to go into greater detail without censoring your ideas. You may find yourself including dialogue, scenery, emotions, and all sorts of other specifics that make an essay personal. As you whittle down this essay to comply with a similar prompt, you’ll want to identify which pieces of the essay do the most work to get your message across. Don’t simply condense everything by eliminating details, for details are often the most memorable aspects of an essay. More on this next.

How to Write a Scholarship Essay Using the Three Fs

The three Fs can be applied to any college essay, though they are particularily useful in scholarship essays. Why? Because the three Fs will enable you to impress readers and beat out other applicants. Ultimately, they’ll help you win financial support. Think of the three Fs as a checklist to go over, once you’ve completed an essay draft. Ask yourself, is my essay fabulous? Flawless? Fearless?

How to Write a Scholarship Essay (Continued)

If your essay is fabulous , it glitters with personality. It is detailed, unique, and does its best to highlight your impressive journey. If your essay lacks a little fab, ask yourself, how can I make this essay more enjoyable and memorable to read? If your essay is flawless , it lacks all spelling, syntactic and grammatical errors. It answers every aspect of the essay prompt, and leaves no room for vagueness or misunderstandings. To avoid flaws, give your essay to several people to proofread. Finally, if your essay is fearless , it is not afraid to get a little vulnerable. This may sound contradictory to the first F. On the contrary, this fearlessness refers to the confidence to tell your own story. A fearless story isn’t afraid to go deep, add complexity, or get emotional. It is unafraid to show why its author deserves a financial boost.

Scholarship Essay Example

Now that we’ve established how to approach the scholarship essay, let’s dive into a scholarship essay example. The scholarship essay below stems from a prompt we saw above: Describe a change you would like to make in the world. Tell us about how you would plan to make that change, and what obstacles you might encounter along the way (500 words).

My generation is growing up in a time of increased global turmoil. We’ve witnessed Brexit, the Russian interference in the 2016 U.S. elections, a series of refugee crises, and the invasion of Ukraine. It’s easy to liken this moment to Europe in the 1930s, which saw a spike in fascism and propaganda (their version of fake news). Only now, my generation must also contend with the hottest summers on record, raging forest fires, and the beginning of the 6 th extinction. It’s no wonder we deal with it all through increased skepticism and existential dread.

While I don’t have a simple solution, I believe most problems stem from ignorance. Xenophobia and racism, offshoots of ignorance, can be overcome by exposing isolated groups of people to greater diversity. This begins in the classroom. While dictators are hard to dispose of, education provides critical thinking skills, which allow citizens to make informed decisions when electing officials. Finally, developing a willingness to learn at an early age creates an instinct to continue learning throughout life. We desperately need intellectual flexibility if we are going to adapt to the planet’s needs as a world population and put a stop to industry-led fossil fuel burning.

Scholarship Essay Example (Continued)

The change I’d like to make is free, enhanced education for everyone, at every level, from elementary school to post-doctorate research institutes. To do so, I suggest defunding national militaries and channeling this spending into schools. Imagine if 80% of the 877 billion dollars the U.S. military spends annually went into learning. Combating fascism and climate change would look more feasible. And yet, no leader would agree to making their country more vulnerable by relinquishing arms and armies. Change must come from the people.

As the planet continues to heats up, and conflict over land increases, we must work together. The first step towards increased education is communicating this need for education: through journalism, on social media, in the streets. Next, I suggest lobbying politicians for incremental change. Finally, I believe a global grassroots movement to implement future-focused education, led by activists, educators, and philanthropists, would make this theoretical idea a tangible reality.

Last year, my mother, who never received a college education, decided to offer free gardening courses in our backyard. I quickly joined in. While teaching a handful of neighbors how to provide year-round food for pollinators may seem trivial, I’ve already seen positive repercussions. One conservative neighbor has set up an organization that collects and redistributes leftover produce from the markets to refugees. Another neighbor is now teaching middle schoolers how to cook and compost. These efforts have brought unusual strangers together and given visibility to our movement, #futurefocusededucation. I’ve seen it firsthand. The more we educate, the sooner we can combine our knowledge to create solutions.

Scholarship Essay Example Dissected

This scholarship essay succeeds at answering all parts of the prompt. It includes the change the author wants to make, and inevitable obstacles she’d face at the governmental and international level. These obstacles may sound insurmountable. Yet the essay shows that individuals are not powerless to enact change when they work together towards a common goal. The author provides various thoughtful steps we might take in order to prioritize education and peaceful collaboration.

Finally, the author portrays herself as someone personally invested in the political, humanitarian, and environmental state of the world. She proves that she’s already begun to make the changes she wants to see at the microscopic level. Overall, readers of this scholarship essay can see that this student is invested in bettering the world. This student would make for a proactive participant in her academic environment.

What’s Next?

Now that you have some inkling of how to write a scholarship essay and have reviewed of our scholarship essay examples, you may want to delve into more aid-related articles on the College Transitions Dataverse. You can read up on Need-Based Financial Aid Grants , and learn about Selective Colleges with Generous Scholarships . Furthermore, you may want to create your own Scholarship Timeline , in order to stay on top of the various deadlines. Good luck!

• Costs & Financial Aid

Kaylen Baker

With a BA in Literary Studies from Middlebury College, an MFA in Fiction from Columbia University, and a Master’s in Translation from Université Paris 8 Vincennes-Saint-Denis, Kaylen has been working with students on their writing for over five years. Previously, Kaylen taught a fiction course for high school students as part of Columbia Artists/Teachers, and served as an English Language Assistant for the French National Department of Education. Kaylen is an experienced writer/translator whose work has been featured in Los Angeles Review, Hybrid, San Francisco Bay Guardian, France Today, and Honolulu Weekly, among others.

• 2-Year Colleges
• ADHD/LD/Autism/Executive Functioning
• Application Strategies
• Best Colleges by Major
• Best Colleges by State
• Big Picture
• Career & Personality Assessment
• College Essay
• College Search/Knowledge
• College Success
• Data Visualizations
• Dental School Admissions
• Extracurricular Activities
• General Knowledge
• Graduate School Admissions
• High School Success
• High Schools
• Homeschool Resources
• Law School Admissions
• Medical School Admissions
• Navigating the Admissions Process
• Online Learning
• Outdoor Adventure
• Private High School Spotlight
• Research Programs
• Summer Program Spotlight
• Summer Programs
• Teacher Tools
• Test Prep Provider Spotlight

“Innovative and invaluable…use this book as your college lifeline.”

— Lynn O'Shaughnessy

Nationally Recognized College Expert

$2,000 No Essay Scholarship

Presented by College Transitions

• Win $2,000 for college • 1 minute or less to enter • No essay required • Open to students and parents in the U.S.

Create your account today and easily enter all future sweepstakes!

Enter to Win $2,000 Today!

Scholarship Essay Writing

Scholarship Essay Examples

Winning Scholarship Essay Examples for Students: Tips Included

37 min read

Published on: Mar 14, 2021

Last updated on: Jul 23, 2024

People also read

Scholarship Essay - A Complete Writing Guide

Scholarship Essay Format - A Complete Guide

Most Popular Scholarship Essay Prompts & Questions

Share this article

Many students face financial barriers when it comes to pursuing higher education. The rising costs of tuition, books, and other educational expenses can be overwhelming. 

This is why the scholarships offer a lifeline by providing financial aid to students, but the competition is fierce. 

That's where CollegeEssay.org comes in. 

In this blog post, we are providing scholarship essay examples that will inspire and guide you in creating your own exceptional essay. 

These examples serve as beacons of success, offering valuable insights into the art of scholarship essay writing. 

So, without further ado, let’s get started. 

On This Page On This Page -->

Scholarship Essay Examples Financial Need

Why this scholarship essay worked.

This scholarship essay example effectively conveys the applicant's financial need and their determination to overcome the challenges associated with it. Here's why this essay worked:

• Personal Storytelling: The essay begins with a personal anecdote that establishes a connection between the applicant's background and financial constraints. This helps create empathy and demonstrates the genuine impact of financial challenges on their educational journey.
• Resilience and Resourcefulness: The applicant showcases their resilience and resourcefulness in navigating financial hardships. They highlight their proactive approach to seeking part-time employment and actively pursuing scholarships.
• Academic Commitment: Despite the financial strain, the applicant emphasizes their commitment to academic excellence by maintaining a high GPA. This showcases their dedication and ability to prioritize their studies amidst challenging circumstances.
• Community Involvement : The essay also highlights the applicant's involvement in community service. This demonstrates their desire to give back and make a positive impact.
• Connection to Scholarship: The applicant clearly articulates how receiving the scholarship would benefit them. This demonstrates a strong alignment between their goals and the purpose of the scholarship.

Want more examples, check out these winning scholarship essay examples.

Financial Aid Scholarship Essay

Scholarship Essay for Financial Need

Scholarship Essay Examples About Yourself

Why this essay worked.

This scholarship essay worked for several reasons, such as:

• It effectively showcases the applicant's passion for mathematics, community engagement, and resilience.
• It compellingly conveyed the applicant's dedication, ambition, and potential for making a positive impact. This makes them a deserving candidate for the scholarship.
• Clear connection to the scholarship's goals and how it would further the applicant's educational journey and impact.

Here are some scholarship essay examples about yourself; get an idea from them, and create a successful essay.

Scholarship Essay Example About Yourself

Scholarship Essay About Yourself

Scholarship Essay Examples for Nursing

Why this essay worked.

This essay worked due to its compelling portrayal of the applicant's genuine passion for nursing, coupled with their unwavering dedication to making a positive impact in patient care.

The essay effectively demonstrates the applicant's well-rounded preparation for a nursing career and their clear alignment with the goals and mission of the scholarship, making them a strong candidate for consideration.

Below are some more examples of scholarship essays for nursing.

Nursing Scholarship Essay

Scholarship Essay for Nursing

Scholarship Essay Examples About Career Goals

This essay worked for the following reasons:

• Clear and Specific Career Goals: The essay effectively outlines the applicant's career goal of becoming a clinical psychologist specializing in mental health support. The clarity and specificity of the goal demonstrate a well-defined path and a strong sense of purpose.
• Demonstrated Preparation and Commitment: The essay showcases the applicant's comprehensive preparation for their career goals. It also demonstrates their readiness and dedication to excel in the field.
• Alignment with Scholarship Objectives: The essay effectively highlights how the scholarship will contribute to the applicant's career aspirations. This includes attending conferences, workshops, and advanced training programs.

If you find difficulty writing the scholarship essay about career goals, get help from the below-mentioned examples, and submit a well-written essay.

Scholarship Essay Examples About Leadership

Three reasons why this essay worked are:

• Demonstrated Leadership Experience : This essay effectively highlights the applicant's practical experience in leadership roles, showcasing their ability to lead teams, organize events, and coordinate volunteers.
• Commitment to Personal Growth : The essay demonstrates the applicant's proactive approach to leadership development by seeking formal training and participating in workshops focused on honing their skills. 
• Emphasis on Collaboration and Empowerment: The essay emphasizes the applicant's belief in collaborative leadership. It promotes inclusivity and empowers team members to contribute their unique perspectives. 

Here we gather some good scholarship essay examples about leadership that help in your writing.

Leadership Scholarship Essay Example

Paper Due? Why Suffer? That's our Job!

Scholarship Essay Examples About Community Service

Here are the reasons:

• Genuine Passion and Commitment: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's genuine passion for community service, highlighting their long-standing involvement and the transformative impact it has had on their life. 
• Integration of Service with Education: The essay demonstrates the applicant's proactive approach to integrating their passion for community service with their educational pursuits.
• Aspiration for Social Change: The essay goes beyond personal experiences and highlights the applicant's aspirations for broader social change.

Here is an excellent community service scholarship essa y that can help you write for community college.

Scholarship Essay Example about Community Service

High School Scholarship Essay Examples

• Clear and Convincing Goals: The essay effectively communicates the applicant's strong desire to pursue higher education despite financial constraints.
• Demonstrated Leadership and Well-Roundedness: The essay showcases the applicant's involvement in extracurricular activities. It highlights their ability to balance academic responsibilities with active participation in clubs, sports teams, and community service initiatives.
• Emphasis on Giving Back and Community Engagement: The essay not only focuses on the applicant's personal aspirations but also highlights their commitment to giving back to their community.

The following are the best high school scholarship essay examples, use this for your help, and write an attention-grabbing essay.

Scholarship Essay Example for High School

Scholarship Essay for High School

Scholarship Essay Examples for University

Why this essay works.

Three reasons why this essay works are:

• Strong Personal Motivation: The essay effectively communicates the applicant's unwavering commitment and determination to pursue a university education.
• Articulation of Long-Term Goals and Social Impact: The essay goes beyond highlighting the applicant's academic achievements and financial needs. It emphasizes the applicant's desire to contribute to their community and make a positive impact on society.
• The connection between Scholarship and Applicant's Potential: The essay effectively illustrates how receiving the scholarship would directly address the financial burden. Plus, it will enable the applicant to fully embrace the university experience.

Here are some excellent scholarship essay examples for university students that help you in writing the essay.

Scholarship Essay Example for University Students

Scholarship Essay Examples for Engineering

This essay worked because of the following reasons:

• Passion and Commitment: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's deep passion for engineering. It also shows their genuine commitment to making a positive impact in this field.
• Alignment with Scholarship Objectives: It clearly establishes the connection between the scholarship and the applicant's goals in engineering.
• Future Impact and Growth: It also communicates the applicant's aspiration to contribute to the field of engineering and make a positive difference in the world.

The following is another scholarship essay example that can help you in creating the perfect essay on your own.

Scholarship Essay Examples for Masters

This essay worked for several reasons:

• Clear Purpose and Goal: The essay effectively conveys the applicant's clear purpose and goal of pursuing a master's degree. It highlights the transformative impact that a master's degree can have on personal and professional growth.
• Financial Need and Scholarship Alignment : The essay addresses the financial challenges associated with pursuing a master's degree. It demonstrates the direct alignment between the scholarship and the applicant's needs.
• Impact and Giving Back : The essay goes beyond personal aspirations and emphasizes the applicant's intention to make a broader impact on their community and society.

Here is an example that you can use as a guide and write a perfect scholarship essay.

Why Should You Receive this Scholarship Essay Examples

Three brief reasons why this essay worked are:

• Clear and Convincing Arguments : The essay presents concise and compelling arguments to support the applicant's case for receiving the scholarship.
• Personal Connection : It demonstrates how receiving the scholarship would directly impact the applicant's academic journey
• Gratitude and Future Commitment : It expresses sincere gratitude for the opportunity and emphasizes the applicant's commitment to making the most of the scholarship.

Here is an example, take help from them for your scholarship essay.

Why Should You Receive this Scholarship Essay Example

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Examples

• Compelling Personal Story: The essay effectively presents the applicant's personal story and highlights their dedication and commitment to their education
• Addressing Academic Excellence and Financial Need : The essay successfully addresses both academic excellence and financial need, which are two crucial aspects considered by scholarship committees.
• Commitment to Making an Impact: The essay goes beyond the applicant's personal goals and emphasizes their dedication to making a positive impact in their community. 

Here’s another example for this scholarship essay below:

Why I Deserve This Scholarship Essay Example

Tips for Writing the Effective Scholarship Essay

When it comes to writing an effective scholarship essay, there are several key tips to keep in mind. 

By following these guidelines, you can maximize your chances of standing out and impressing scholarship selection committees. 

Here are some essential tips to help you craft a compelling scholarship essay:

• Understand the Prompt

Take the time to thoroughly understand the essay prompt or topic provided by the scholarship provider. Pay attention to any specific instructions or guidelines given.

• Research the Scholarship

Familiarize yourself with the organization or institution offering the scholarship. Understand their values, mission, and objectives. This knowledge will help you align your essay with their goals and demonstrate your fit for the scholarship.

• Tell Your Unique Story

Use the essay as an opportunity to showcase your personal experiences, like obstacles you might encounter, achievements, and aspirations. Highlight what sets you apart from other applicants. Be authentic and genuine in conveying your story, like overcoming personal failures.

• Start with a Compelling Introduction

Grab the reader's attention from the beginning with a strong and captivating introduction. Consider starting with a compelling anecdote, a thought-provoking question, or a powerful statement.

• Structure Your Essay

Organize your essay into a clear and logical structure. Start with an introduction, followed by body paragraphs that support your main points, and end with a concise and impactful conclusion.

• Be Concise and Specific

Scholarship essays often have a word or character limits, so make every word count. Be concise in your writing and avoid unnecessary fluff. Focus on providing specific examples and details that support your claims.

• Showcase Your Achievements

Highlight your academic accomplishments, extracurricular involvements, community service, leadership roles, or any other relevant achievements. Link them to the values and goals of the scholarship.

• Address the Selection Criteria

Ensure that your essay addresses the selection criteria specified by the scholarship provider. If they are looking for specific qualities or skills, tailor your essay to showcase how you possess those attributes.

In conclusion, writing an effective scholarship essay is a crucial step in securing the financial aid you need for your education. 

By following the tips outlined here, you can enhance your essay-writing skills and create a compelling narrative that captivates scholarship selection committees.

Be authentic, concise, and specific in your writing. Tailor your essay to align with the values and objectives of the scholarship provider. And above all, believe in yourself and your potential to make a difference through education.

If you're seeking further guidance and support in your scholarship essay writing journey, consider partnering with our AI essay writing tools !

We also have a team of experienced and professional essay writers who can provide personal essay writing service with valuable insights. 

Hire our college paper writing service  today and take the next step towards securing the financial aid you deserve.

Barbara P (Literature, Marketing)

Barbara is a highly educated and qualified author with a Ph.D. in public health from an Ivy League university. She has spent a significant amount of time working in the medical field, conducting a thorough study on a variety of health issues. Her work has been published in several major publications.

Need Help With Your Essay?

Also get FREE title page, Turnitin report, unlimited revisions, and more!

Keep reading

OFF ON CUSTOM ESSAYS

Legal & Policies

• Privacy Policy
• Cookies Policy
• Terms of Use
• Refunds & Cancellations
• Our Writers
• Success Stories
• Our Guarantees
• Affiliate Program
• Referral Program
• AI Essay Writer

Disclaimer: All client orders are completed by our team of highly qualified human writers. The essays and papers provided by us are not to be used for submission but rather as learning models only.

10 tips on how to write a winning scholarship essay

Studying abroad can be a costly affair for international students, but scholarships can offer some respite . Scholarship applications typically require students to write a scholarship essay to show the admissions committee why they deserve funding.

While competitive, the essay gives you a platform to demonstrate your strengths, goals and accomplishments, both in and out of the classroom.

It requires plenty of thought to produce a winning scholarship essay, but with the cost of tuition rising each year – one academic year’s tuition fees at a US university can range from US$40,000 to US$52,000 while fees at a UK university could start from £9,250 up to £30,000, depending on the course major — the results may be well worth your effort. 

If you’re ready to roll up your sleeves and get busy, here are 10 tips on writing a scholarship essay:

The scholarship essay gives students a platform to demonstrate their strengths, goals and accomplishments, both in and out of the classroom. Source: Patrick T. Fallon/AFP

Scholarship essay tip 1: Highlight what makes you unique

There is no perfect scholarship essay or writing formula, but the vast majority of winning essays give the scholarship committee a good idea of what drives you, your passions and what you want to do with your education. 

In short, write about who you are to the scholarship judges. Make them believe in you and your story.

Scholarship essay tip 2: Read the statement and identify key themes

Your scholarship essay prompt can be either a sentence or a question. From there, identify the theme and what you should expand on. This could be about leadership, your impact or even the community. 

You could write about certain experiences and accomplishments, how and why you chose to be involved in these activities, the challenges you faced and how you overcame these, as well as lessons learnt from the experience.

The more you understand these themes, the more examples you can include to showcase your skills and abilities and how you used them.

For example, 2013 QS Leadership Scholarship winner Hayley Capp ‘s essay statement was: “Where I have demonstrated responsible leadership, or innovation, and how it made a difference either in my community or in my work.”

Capp founded a branch of Enactus – “where people either work with social enterprises or to create a social enterprise, using business and entrepreneurial skills to develop solutions to social problems and make a difference to communities” – at her university during her undergraduate studies.

In her scholarship essay, Capp used her experience of collaborating with Enactus members in Uganda to design strategies for addressing high youth unemployment levels.

Scholarship essay tip 3: Be passionate

Some essay prompts will give you free rein to write about any topic, which will give you the advantage of writing about something that you enjoy or that means a lot to you.

For example, your prompt may ask you to describe your proudest accomplishments. You can discuss your volunteer experiences , or perhaps about looking after your sick family member despite having a busy schedule. An understanding of your family circumstances can give the admissions committee a holistic view of you as sports, extracurricular activities or even community service can be a privilege that requires resources an applicant may or may not have access to. 

Because Joy Zhou ’s supplemental scholarship essay asked her to describe an experience with an extracurricular activity of her choosing, she wrote about how she managed to found a Science Olympiad club in her high school despite numerous challenges, including objections from the athletic director.

“Try to go with something that you have been doing for a long time and think if there is something quirky or different about your experience in it, or there is some aspect of that experience that you can use to sum up the entirety of your experience doing the extracurricular activity or if there is a passion burning, you can write about that too,” Zhou advises.

Vanderbilt University awarded a full-tuition scholarship to Zhou.

Scholarship essay tip 4: Learn what moves the judges

Why are the judges or universities giving this scholarship? You have to dig deep to understand their motivations behind the scholarship, and what their mission is, be it to increase equity or the university’s competitive advantage.

Take a look at previous scholarship winners and read their essays or excerpts, and you will have a better idea of what appeals most to the scholarship committee.

Having a better understanding of what the scholarship committee is looking for will give you a better shot than writing an essay by shooting in the dark.

Scholarship essay tip 5: Create a strong hook

The beginning of your essay should have a strong hook. A powerful opening sentence will help you draw a reader in and convince him or her to read the rest of your essay.

Ritesh Verma wanted to be a millionaire so he studied stock patterns and professional trades and even made some money over two years. He felt he was ready to go even further so he asked his parents to fund an Ameritrade account but “the stock market took it within a week”.

He began his essay with,  “It was ironic that my life shattered into a million pieces,  or so I thought. What’s this dream? Well, I had a vision myself as a millionaire, realising that millionaire stock trader lifestyle that’s our ties across the internet.”

His essay helped him win a scholarship worth over  US$100,000 to study at the University of Maryland, College Park.

Scholarship essay tip 6: Be aware of the word limit

Many scholarships will have a word limit, so stick to it — it’s there for a reason. If you exceed the word count, your scholarship essay, however great and well-written, may be disqualified.

You can keep track of your word count when using  Microsoft Word or Google Docs. There are also apps to help you keep track of your words, including letter counter .

Scholarship essay tip 7: Plan, plan, plan

Your main goal is to make your scholarship essay stand out from the competition. One surefire tip is to plan what goes into your essay.

Create a structure (introduction, body and conclusion) that works for you — a winning scholarship essay may vary in structure, so you need to decide what would work for you that suits your content and writing style.

Scholarship essay tip 8: Persuasive writing

This might be of interest to you if you have not heard of the persuasive “writing triangle” before: ethos, pathos and logos. A great scholarship essay uses this triangle for maximum persuasive effect because these three techniques are excellent for pulling in the reader’s attention.

Ethos uses credibility or reliability to establish your knowledge on the subject matter. Your life experiences – which most scholarship essays ask about (luckily!) – are a form of ethos, so use this to your advantage.

Pathos makes use of emotional appeals like creativity and imagination. For example, you may be asked to talk about an imaginary future and how you will make this a better one with your invention or strengths.

Finally, logos refers to using logic to make your points more factual. Your scholarship essay can include key statistics about a related social issue that you want to discuss.

Scholarship essay tip 9: Be realistic and specific 

Why do you deserve a scholarship? This can be a challenging question to answer, particularly for a need-based scholarship, as you may struggle to decide how honest you want to be about your financial or family circumstances that have led you to apply for a scholarship in the first place.

It’s important to note that you should never lie in your essay. If you know what you want to get out from your scholarship is funding for your studies, state it in your essay. Explain how the scholarship can help you to achieve your goals.

Scholarship essay tip 10: Revise

Above all, make an effort to revise your scholarship essay. Take breaks whenever possible and look at your essay with fresh eyes. This way, you will find more ways of revising your essay to ensure the final copy reads and flows well.

Find someone you can trust – your teacher, friend or advisor – to read your draft. Sometimes, they will find mistakes you have missed and can give you feedback on how to improve it.

All in all, we understand writing a scholarship essay is not easy, but with these tips, we hope that you will have an easier time doing this. All the best!

Popular stories

4 european institutions empowering future pharmacists and scientists.

How one joking LinkedIn post led to 2 life-changing internships in Malaysia

Goethe University Frankfurt: Shaping leaders at the intersection of law and finance

The Master in Public Administration graduate helping Nigerians study abroad

10 PhD scholarships in the UK for international students 2022

The no. 1 advice to win a scholarship to the UK: 'Believe in yourself'

The violinist who won two scholarships to study in Switzerland and Japan

How To Write A Scholarship Essay: A Step-By-Step Guide

Link Copied

Share on Facebook

Share on Twitter

Share on LinkedIn

This is your time to shine!

When you apply for a scholarship, you have to submit an essay for it! Many students face a lot of issues, one of which is how to write a compelling scholarship essay that showcases their strengths and sets them apart from the competition. Don't worry; this is an issue we will help you solve by teaching you everything you need to know about how to write a scholarship essay, from how to start a scholarship essay to how to end one! So, let's dive right into it!

What is a Scholarship Essay?

A scholarship essay is a crucial component of the application process when seeking financial aid for your educational pursuits. It serves as a platform to persuasively articulate why you are a deserving candidate. It also shows how to write a scholarship essay that sets you apart from the competition. This essay is submitted with the scholarship application, and it is your one opportunity to demonstrate that you are the best candidate for the scholarship. Now, let us get started on the writing part of a scholarship essay:

How to Write a Scholarship Essay?

Let's discuss how to write a scholarship essay! Here are a few things to keep in mind on how to write a scholarship essay. One simple tip about a scholarship essay is just to make sure that your essay provides insight into your vision and experience, which ultimately defines you and your passion for your study subject. Here are a few points to note when you write an essay on a scholarship.

Step 1: Hook your reader from the start

If you have questions about how to start an essay? Try including a quote or phrase related to your planned course that you may later introduce in the essay. Giving an idea about your interest in the subject will persuade the committee. Showing a broader understanding of your subject can assist in convincing the judges to provide you with the financial aid you need. 

Step 2: Understand your audience

When you start to write your essay for a scholarship, you need to know your target audience, in this case, the scholarship committee; you need to understand their requirements and expectations. Find out their ideal prospect and make sure you fit into that vision. Make a list of key points you want to include in your essay. You don't have to give up your vision; modify your essay to fit their parameters.

Step 3. Read the scholarship essay prompts carefully

When you think about how to start a scholarship essay, the biggest tip is to read the essay prompts thoroughly. You must comply with the appropriate essay prompt structure and word count. Also, double-check that you are simply replying to all prompt sections.

Step 4. Get to know the scholarship provider

Read about the corporation or organisation in charge of the scholarship programme. You will find their mission and requirements on their website; this is one of the best tips on how to write a scholarship essay. This can help you customise your essay according to their needs. Many scholarship sponsors also showcase former scholarship winners on their websites, often with the winning essay. Examine what the scholarship provider says about prior winners to determine which of your qualities to emphasise in your essay.

Amberscholar 2024 September Edition is here!

Step 5. share your authenticity.

One of the best tips on how to write a scholarship essay is that your life and experiences are essential and significant! You are not required to fabricate or invent details to appear more deserving of the scholarship money. Your authenticity is your power; use it for your gain. It is recommended to show and not tell, as it is evident for the readers to spot such things. Instead of just explaining everything, try constructing a vivid image for the reader. Don't just claim you're stressed out because you're juggling employment and high school; make a mental image and provide clear, credible instances. 

Gain a competitive edge by delving into the intricacies of scholarship opportunities in sought-after destinations such as Australia, Ireland, and the US. Your journey to academic excellence begins with the wisdom shared in our insightful blogs on student scholarships in Australia , scholarships in Ireland and if you want to apply in the US, then there is a blog on top scholarships in the USA for international students.

Step 6. Seek feedback and guidance on your writing

To make your essay stand out, it's important to seek out writing advice and guidance from reliable sources when you are lost on how to write a scholarship essay. Your academic advisor can provide valuable insights into the writing process, such as how to write a scholarship essay, how to start a scholarship essay, and how to make your argument compelling. There are plenty of online resources that can help you improve your writing skills, such as grammar and style guides, online writing courses, and writing communities where you can get feedback on your work.

Step 7. Ensure your scholarship essay is free from grammatical errors

Make sure you proofread your essay and look for grammatical errors. You can scan your essay through various grammar-checking websites before submitting your essay.

Scholarship Essay Format

One of the key aspects of how to write a scholarship essay is to write a compelling argument to stand out from the competition and convince the selection committee that you are the best candidate for the award. However, it is equally important to pay attention to the essay format. We will discuss the important things to remember and include in a scholarship essay format.

1. Fonts to use for scholarship essay

One tip on how to write a scholarship essay is to stick to a consistent professional style. This includes 1-inch page margins, a 12-point font size double-spaced, and a "standard" script like Times New Roman in classic black. Don't experiment with fonts or colours here. You want the content of your essay to stand out, not your unconventional formatting.

2. Scholarship essay title

The essay submission format determines this. You can copy and paste the body of your essay without a title if there is a text box entry. If you attach an essay as a Word or PDF document, you can include a title, although this is usually unnecessary unless there are specific scholarship essay format rules. Also, there is no need to add the essay question or prompt at the top of your essay.

3. Scholarship essay structure

The structure of the essay is a very crucial element. The structure of the essay helps you make a blueprint and guides you in deciding which points have to be included under which section. This is a format that is generally used when you think about how to write a scholarship essay. 

Introduction

When you think about how to start a scholarship essay, it needs to draw the attention of the reader with a catchy beginning line relating to the question. Introduce your significant points, which you will discuss later in your essay. Include a strong point that proves your determination and drive to attend college.

Extend your critical points in the essay for a scholarship here. Support your claims with proof, examples, and facts. This is the section where you can tell the committee how you got to where you are now, what inspired your hobbies, interests, or desire to attend college, and how the essay for a scholarship will help you reach your academic, personal, and career goals . 

Describe how earning this award might help you achieve your goals and have a broader community impact, if any. Explain how critical this scholarship is to you, not only financially but also in terms of helping you reach your goals, and this is how to end a scholarship essay. You can know more through our blog on how to write personal statements . 

Scholarship Essay Examples

Receiving multiple smaller scholarship awards can be life-changing and help you achieve your college and professional goals. The following scholarship essays demonstrate how to write a winning scholarship essay for any university:

Scholarship Essay Example #1: New York University College of Arts and Science Essay

"Although I agree that I will never be able to support myself only via ice skating, the education and talents I have obtained have opened endless avenues. Ice skating has given me the work ethic, resilience and inspiration to grow as a teacher and English speaker. It has helped my academic performance by instilling in me the importance of rhythm, health, and routine."

Scholarship Essay Example #2: North Coast Section Foundation Scholarship-Winning Essay

"My parents pushed me to respect school when I was five years old because they were born in Vietnam and had limited access to education. Because of this disadvantage, I learnt to take everything seriously and to give everything I had to fulfil projects like founding my school's Badminton Club in my fresher year and the Red Cross Club this year. The more I got involved, the more I grew as a leader and as a person. As a leader, I acted the same way I did with my younger cousins and siblings."

Scholarship Essay Example #3: University of California, Berkeley Scholarship Essay

"My passion for computer science began in middle school when I discovered the power of coding to create and solve problems. Since then, I've dedicated countless hours to learning programming languages and developing my skills. Last summer, I had the opportunity to intern at a local tech company, where I contributed to a real-world software project and gained invaluable experience working in a professional environment. This experience solidified my desire to pursue a career in software engineering and make a positive impact through technology."

Scholarship Essay Example #4: Georgia Institute of Technology Scholarship Essay

"As a first-generation college student, I understand the value of education and the sacrifices my parents made to provide me with opportunities they never had. Their unwavering support and belief in me have been my greatest motivators. Through my involvement in various extracurricular activities, including volunteering at a local community centre and tutoring underprivileged children, I've developed a deep appreciation for giving back and making a difference in others' lives. Pursuing a degree in engineering will allow me to combine my love for science and mathematics with my passion for helping others."

Next Edition of amberscholar is here!

Register Now!

Scholarship Essay Prompts

Are you struggling to come up with ideas on how to write a scholarship essay? There are plenty of standard essay prompts and topics out there to guide you. These prompts will help you get started on your essay for a scholarship and give it a definite structure. Let's explore some useful scholarship essay prompts that you can use to write a scholarship essay.

1. My family members

2. My part-time job efforts in high school

3. The doors I have opened

4. My dreams and inspiration

5. Learning for the best - how (person) changed my life

6. The person who is influenced by views

7. Goals I will achieve in 10 years

8. What differentiates you from the hundreds of students who apply for our scholarships?

9. How has the death of a parent or guardian impacted your life financially and emotionally?

Tips on How to Write a Winning Scholarship Essay

It is crucial to make your essay for a scholarship stand out from the hundreds of other applicants while working on it. A well-written and formatted essay can not only grab the attention of the scholarship committee but also make a strong impression, increasing the likelihood of obtaining the scholarship. Here are some tips on how to write a winning scholarship essay:

1. Select a topic you are passionate about

2. Follow a narrative structure

3. Organise your essay in a clear

4. Re-read the essay prompt and identify the key themes

5. Outline your essay

6. Make sure your outline does justice to your essay prompt

7. Highlight your experiences and problem-solving skills

8. Talk about your accomplishments modestly

9. Maintain a consistent flow throughout your essay

10. Seek feedback and proofread your essay

11. Be concise and specific, and avoid generalising.

12. Use punctuation strategically to add emphasis and structure to your sentences

13.  Research the university and the scholarship they are providing before you write an essay

14. While maintaining a professional tone, write the essay in your unique voice

15. Avoid overusing of inspirational quotes in your essay

Things you need to Avoid While Writing a Scholarship Essay

Writing a compelling scholarship essay can be a challenging task, but keeping the necessary guidelines in mind will make the process smoother. Avoiding certain pitfalls is just as important as following the recommended best practices. Here are some crucial don'ts that you should follow when you write an essay for a scholarship.

1. Never plagiarise in your essay, as this will undoubtedly get your application rejected. Use your authentic words and ideas, and cite any sources properly if you need to reference them in your essay

2. While adding a personal touch to your essay with your qualities and experiences is encouraged, avoid coming across as insincere or overly emotional. Maintain a balanced and professional tone throughout your writing.

3. Submit your essay before the deadline, as missing it could potentially disqualify you from consideration. Plan ahead and give yourself ample time to draft, revise, and proofread your essay.

4. Your essay should be directly relevant to the scholarship you are applying for. Do not write an essay that is unrelated and does not answer the prompt, as this may lead to disqualification.

When you think about how to write a scholarship essay, it may seem like a daunting task, but keeping the necessary guidelines in mind will make the process smoother. Here are some do's and don'ts that you should follow when you write an essay for a scholarship.

Ready to ace your scholarship essay? Stay focused in the cozy study lounges at amber's accommodation!

Book through amber today!

Top 5 Scholarships and Scholarship Essays

The essay for a scholarship serves as a platform to demonstrate to the scholarship committee why you are a deserving candidate and what sets you apart from other applicants. It provides an opportunity to highlight challenges you have faced, how you coped with and overcame them, and showcase your problem-solving abilities. Here are the top 5 scholarships and a brief overview of their scholarship essay requirements.

1. Kang Foundation and Legal Scholarship

This scholarship is aimed at students pursuing a career in law. The essay should highlight your passion for the legal field, your academic achievements, and any relevant extracurricular activities or work experiences that have prepared you for a career in law.

2. New York University Scholarship

The New York University Scholarship essay prompts often focus on your personal growth, intellectual curiosity, and how you plan to contribute to the diverse community at NYU. The essay should showcase your unique perspective and how you have overcome challenges or pursued your interests.

3. North Coast Section Foundation Scholarship

This scholarship is awarded to students who have demonstrated leadership and community involvement. The essay should highlight your leadership experiences, volunteer work, and how you have made a positive impact in your community.

4. Fund for Education Abroad Scholarship 

The Fund for Education Abroad Scholarship is designed for students who wish to study abroad. The essay should outline your goals for studying abroad, how it aligns with your academic and personal aspirations, and how you plan to leverage the experience to further your personal and professional growth.

5. Questbridge Scholarship

The Questbridge Scholarship is a prestigious program that provides financial aid to high-achieving, low-income students. The essay should focus on your academic achievements, personal challenges you have overcome, and your aspirations for the future. It should also highlight your commitment to making a positive impact in your community or society.

We hope this guide helped you find new ways to write a scholarship essay. The amber scholarship is a scholarship provided by amber; we hope you try your luck with it! This is your chance to show the scholarship committee what you have to deserve the scholarship. Also, read about our blog on what should be written in a personal statement . For those working on their dissertations, we provide valuable insights on crafting a compelling thesis statement. You can also check our detailed blog on how to write thesis statements .

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you write a compelling introduction for a scholarship essay, how do you structure a scholarship essay effectively, what are some tips for writing a strong conclusion for a scholarship essay, how can you make your scholarship essay stand out, what common mistakes should you avoid in a scholarship essay.

Your ideal student home & a flight ticket awaits

Follow us on :

Related Posts

Top 10 UK Scholarships For PhD Students

How To Get Scholarship To Study In the USA

Best Fully Funded Scholarship In Canada In 2024

amber © 2024. All rights reserved.

4.6/5 on Trustpilot

Rated as "Excellent" • 5000+ Reviews by students

4.8/5 on Trustpilot

Rated as "Excellent" • 4800+ Reviews by Students

• Applying For Scholarships

How to Write a Scholarship Essay Introduction (With Example)

David Nov 27, 2018

Get our best scholarship practices, insights & tips delivered to your inbox

Thank you for subscribing!

With the thousands of scholarships out there, you have a chance to win serious money to put towards your college tuition. But, the scholarship application process can be quite stressful, so we are here to help. The most difficult part of the application process for students is usually the essay . How do you write it? What should it include? We are going to focus on how to start a scholarship essay introduction.  

Scholarships are super competitive and the reviewers may not even have time to read the entire essay submitted. So, the first sentence of your scholarship application is your first and best chance to convince the reader to continue reading. For this reason, your essay’s introduction is crucial.

That sounds stressful, but rest assured, your introduction can actually be your best tool for success. Luckily, there is no one right way to write a scholarship introduction, but there are some things you must keep in mind.

You need to catch the judges’ eyes from the very beginning of the essay. Imagine that your readers have to read hundreds of applications. You must make your essay stand out.

The fastest path to earning scholarships

Simplify and focus your application process with the one-stop platform for vetted scholarships.

Your introduction should include the following three things:

• Attention-grabbing first sentence
• A short explanation for what you will talk about in your essay
• The thesis statement in which you address the essay prompt

Your introduction should be short, sweet, and to the point. This is the place to establish for the reader what you will be discussing in the rest of the essay.

Do you have a short story you can open your essay with? Jokes, metaphors, and anecdotes are a great way to capture your reader’s attention. Try to develop a personal connection with the reader from the start of your essay- readers are more likely to remember you if you give them something personal.

Take a look at the following two examples:

• Example #1: It is important to take responsibility for your actions for a few reasons.
• Example #2: December 2, 2015 was the day my life took a major turning point.

Do you notice the difference? Which example makes you feel like you want to know more about the writer? Of course, example #2. This is the effect that your essay introduction should have on the reader.

Be sure to maintain a unique voice in your introduction and throughout your essay. Remember that there are many other accomplished students like yourself who are fighting for the scholarship. Dive into your passions and share with the reader what makes you special.

Here are things you should avoid doing in the introduction paragraph:

• Avoid using big words only to sound intelligent. Your introduction should sound natural.
• Avoid starting your essay with quotes; those are somebody else’s words, not your own. Instead, use your own words and let your personality shine in the essay.
• Avoid obvious statements such as “I am interested in this scholarship.”
• Avoid introducing yourself

Also, remember to keep in mind the values of the organization or the school that you are writing the scholarship for. Express yourself in a way that the readers will appreciate. Yes, it’s important to be yourself. But, it’s also important to share the side of yourself that your reader will appreciate. To find this information out, you must research your audience to know what their values are.

Adapt your personal statement for different scholarships. Finally, make sure that you understand the instructions and essay questions before you begin writing.

Scholarship Essay Introduction Example:

Prompt: Please give the committee an idea of who you are and why you are the perfect candidate for the scholarship.

• Scholarship Essay

David Tabachnikov is the CEO of ScholarshipOwl. Formerly at Waze and Google, David is an experienced CTO/R&D manager with over 10 years of experience of leading tech teams. David fervently believes that students should have greater access to education, and is passionate about using technology to help them achieve that goal.

Related Stories View All

Everything About The Coalition Application

Phi Theta Kappa Scholarships

Top 33 No Essay Scholarships for January 2023

Get started with scholarshipowl.

Simplify and focus your application process with the one-stop platform for vetted scholarships

How to answer “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” essay prompt (with examples!)

When you’re applying for scholarships, you’ll see tons of different essay prompts. Two of the most common are “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” or its variant “Why are you applying for this scholarship?” While these might seem like intimidating questions, don’t overthink them! These are straightforward questions that you can easily answer. Here’s how.

What’s the scholarship committee looking for?

Tips to consider.

• Examples of “Why I Deserve It” scholarship essays

Variant: “Why are you applying for this scholarship?”

Variant: “why do you need this scholarship”, ready to start answering an essay prompt like this.

Scholarship providers want to give the award to the most deserving student. So by including these prompts, they’re basically asking: Why should it be you?

In particular, they want to know:

• What makes you unique? What are your particular interests and motivations?
• How do your strengths and goals fit in with this particular scholarship? For instance, why you might deserve an athletic scholarship might be different from why you deserve a financial need scholarship . 
• How will you make use of the scholarship funds? Scholarship providers want to know their awards will make a difference. Show them how this money would really help advance your goals.

Link your passions to the scholarship

One of the first things to consider is to express who you are in your writing. Show scholarship providers why you deserve this scholarship by painting them a picture of who you are and what drives you. But remember to keep it related to the scholarship. For example:

• If you’re applying for a journalism-related scholarship, explain how you became interested in journalism, and what kind of journalism you hope to pursue.
• If you’re applying to a community service scholarship , explain what kind of community service you do and why you’re committed to it.

Show your grit

This is where your scholarship essay might get personal . You might deserve this scholarship because you have persevered through some personal struggles. Those struggles might be more serious–for example, related to family income (growing up poor) or physical obstacles (a disability or injury). Or it might be a more fleeting personal circumstance (like not getting that student organization position you were vying for).

In any case, focus on how you overcame these difficulties–and how the experiences have shaped who you are today. Also remember to focus it back on the scholarship topic at hand.

For example, if you’re applying to an arts scholarship, you might say:

Although I always loved art, growing up poor in a rural area made it difficult to have access to the fine arts museums (far away) or materials (too expensive). So I made do in other ways. I borrowed art books from the library and did virtual tours of the Met and the MOMA from my home computer. And since I couldn’t afford a fancy SLDR camera, I learned all the iPhone photography tricks I could, and used open-source software to do post-production on my photos.

This kind of statement shows how much the student loves art and the lengths the’ve gone to, in order to explore the medium, despite obstacles. A scholarship committee might read this and think: “This student is particularly deserving of our scholarship.

Share what you plan to do with the scholarship award

Why you are deserving doesn’t just have to do with your past achievements; it also has to do with your future plans and goals. Scholarship providers want to fund students who will go on to achieve great things or who wish to give back to their communities.

For instance, in scholarship winner Michelle Marie Charles’ essay, she explains how the award money will be put to good use:

My wish is to help guide undocumented people to obtain a job in a foreign country, and to fight for them to stay in the country. […] Once I am an attorney, I will seek new opportunities to expand the help provided to immigrants. I will create programs that specifically target undocumented people to know their own voice and to educated themselves about the law. […] I know the long journey that lays ahead of them and know how difficult the process of transferring to undocumented to citizen is, but I want to be there so they know that they still have a choice.

Examples of “Why I Deserve It” scholarship essay s

In general, there are three ways we’ve seen Going Merry students successfully tackle this essay. 

1. Treat it like a résumé, in paragraph form.

Since it’s asking you to brag about your strengths, some essay answers simply describe the applicant’s multiple accomplishments (either in chronological order, or grouped by interest/category – like academics, sports, research, student clubs). This is a particularly good strategy if the scholarship application doesn’t ask for a résumé or list of extracurricular activities. In that case, this essay is your opportunity to discuss those.

An example version of this might read like this :

“I [have been committed] to programs that would further develop my view of the world. I have been involved in Choir and Music Club. I have also been a member of the Red Crescent club for 3 years, which has expanded my exposures to other cultures by learning another language and studying multiple customs. I have been the captain of both the varsity golf and softball teams for two years, developing my leadership skills. My involvement in both my school and community prove that I am a student committed to developing a promising future.”

Get matched to scholarships

See how much money you qualify for. Personalized matches . Click below to get started.

Match me to scholarships

2. Treat it like a personal statement. 

Maybe you deserve the scholarship because of the type of person you are: someone who has overcome adversity, thinks deeply, is passionate about a specific subject, or wants to contribute to their community. In that case, you might simply be able to reuse your personal statement , tweaking it slightly to be able to explain how your personal characteristics or narrative make you a deserving scholarship recipient. 

One example of this is Going Merry winner Jesús Adrian Arroyo-Ramirez’s essay , which discusses how he overcame the obstacle of his immigration status. He writes:

I was illegally brought to this country when I was just six years old. At the time I had no clue that I was breaking any laws, and I did not realize the fact that my life was going to change forever. Growing up with a different citizenship situation than my peers was and still is the biggest challenge I have to face in my life. Looking back there is not a single thing that I would change. Knowing that I had to work harder than everyone else led me to be the person that I am today. I took that fire inside of me, pushed myself, graduated first in my class with a cumulative 4.0 GPA, became a Kansas Scholar, and graduated High School with a semester’s worth of college credit. In November of 2016, everything began to look up for me. I received a work permit and a social security card all thanks to the DACA program. I was finally able to get my license, get a job, and most importantly attend college. I plan to continue my success in the classroom and do everything to the best of my ability as I know that under my current circumstances it can all be ripped away from me at any moment. Growing up with my situation has taught me to not take advantage of a single opportunity. 

3. Treat it like a career and/or academic goals essay. 

You’re likely using your scholarship money to attend college or grad school, so that you can pursue certain academic or career interests. You can discuss those, and then explain how scholarship funding would allow you to continue down that intended path, just like this short essay did : 

“The scholarship award will only push me further towards my Accounting degree and my dreams of one day having a successful career as an Accountant. […] Five years from now I see myself employed at a large local firm, crunching numbers, evaluating,and solving certain financial matters. I just feel blessed that I am given the opportunity to be awarded a scholarship to help fulfill my dream and I will prove that I do have what it takes to not only be a successful student, but an outstanding accountant.”

Here’s a guide on writing a career goals essay , and another guide for writing an essay on your academic goals . 

Is this the same question as “Why do you deserve this scholarship?” Yes and no. Both questions get at the same core idea (why are you relevant and deserving of the scholarship money), so for both essay prompts, your essay should describe your strengths and future plans. 

However, to properly answer this “why are you applying” question, you’ll need to more explicitly address your interest in the scholarship topic (e.g. if it’s a scholarship for nursing, why are you interested in nursing), as well as information about your financial situation (you are likely applying because you have need for the money, to pay for college or grad school). 

What about this one? Is this the same question?

Nope! This is a question about financial need. Although it may be uncomfortable to discuss, this prompt is asking you directly about your financial situation and why additional funding is necessary for you to pursue your academic or career plans.  Here’s more information about how to write a statement of financial need .

Also, check out this helpful list of the 10 most common scholarship essay topics to get started!

Now that you’ve got a better grasp on how to answer a prompt like, “Explain why you deserve this scholarship,” we think you’re ready to start writing and applying to scholarships! Get started by signing up for a free profile with Going Merry . You can write your essay and apply to thousands of scholarships . Just think of us as your one-stop shop for all things scholarships, including essay writing resources.

• Recent Posts

• Scholarships for Students in Pennsylvania for 2024 - November 11, 2020
• Counselor Starter Guide: How to Use Going Merry’s Scholarship Platform - September 9, 2020
• How to write a financial need statement for your scholarship application (with examples!) - August 13, 2020

Ready to find scholarships that are a match for you?

ScholarshipMentor

• Scholarships
• Free Newsletter
• Scholarship Resources
• Paying for college

Connect with us

like us on facebook

follow us on twitter

Other Scholarship News

• Fast Food Scholarships
• Scholarships for Children of Active-duty Police and Firefighters
• Essay Contests
• Poster Contests
• Photography Competitions
• Video Competitions
• Nursing Scholarships - National and Local
• Scholarships For Disabled Students
• Science Scholarships
• Scholarships for Students with Deceased Parents

Local Scholarship News

• Community Foundation Scholarships
• The Community Foundation of the Hudson Valley Scholarships
• Community Foundation of Central Illinois
• The Community Foundation of Western Massachusetts Scholarships
• The Connecticut Community Foundation Scholarships
• Minnesota Association of Townships Scholarships for High School Juniors
• The Community Foundation of Susquehanna and Wyoming Counties Scholarships
• The Northern Chautauqua Community Foundation Scholarships
• Grand Haven Area Community Foundation Scholarships
• The Community Foundation of Western Massachusetts Addditional Scholarships
• Adirondack Community Trust (ACT) Scholarships
• The Community Foundation of Middle Tennessee’s Scholarship Program
• The Community Foundation for the Capital Region Scholarships
• The Central New York Community Foundation Scholarships
• The Community Foundation for Greater Buffalo Scholarships
• The Community Foundation of Elmira-Corning and the Finger Lakes Scholarships
• Society of Women Engineers Local Scholarships

Primary links

• Top 5 Items to List in Your Scholarship Essay

It’s true that higher education costs are climbing. However, scholarships can make it easier to pay for college. Finding and applying for scholarships takes creativity and dedication, and the process is often rigorous and competitive. But by highlighting just a handful of factors on your scholarship essay, you can ace the all-important first step: submitting the best possible scholarship application.

1. Major Accomplishments

·         You’ll list several major accomplishments on the scholarship application, but in your essay, expand on one or two that will impress the judges.

·         Focus on the main theme. If the scholarship committee is looking for students who are going into environmental work, write about the stewardship activities you’ve participated in and how they inspired or changed you.

·         Include achievements even if they haven’t been formally recognized, such as activities you’ve done on your own. Have you helped an elderly neighbor? Did your part-time job ease your family’s financial situation? Were you a mentor to a child?

·         It’s acceptable to brag about your achievements; no one else is going to toot your horn for you. However, it’s never OK to embellish the facts or invent accomplishments.

2. Distinguishing Skills

·         What talents set you apart? Are your leadership skills top-notch? Do you speak a second language? Are you adept at computer programming? Can you act, sing or dance? How do your skills help you accomplish your goals?

·         Help the committee understand how you developed your skills. Explain that you took acting classes after school or studied Mandarin Chinese on the weekends and you’ll demonstrate your commitment to your passion, as well your perseverance in working toward self-improvement.

·         Scholarship committees are typically looking for individuality. Explain how your skill set makes you unique.

3. Your Strongest Personality Trait

·         What is your No. 1, unwavering personality trait? Do you adhere to a particular philosophy? Are you confident, reliable or meticulous? Do you have a strong independent streak?

·         Provide details about your strongest trait and examples of how it has guided you throughout your life.

·         Include specifics about how your primary personality trait has helped you through challenging situations, as well as how it has helped others.

4. Activities Outside the Classroom

·         List your extracurricular activities and expand on them in your essay.

·         Explain why you chose the activities, how they enriched your academic, social or personal life, and how you contributed to the group.

·         Demonstrate how these activities have prepared you for your future in college and beyond.

5. Your Moment of Epiphany

·         Think about the “big moments” in your life. Was there a time when you realized what you wanted to do with your life? Did an interaction with a friend, relative or complete stranger make you look at the world differently?

·         Write in detail about what happened, your reaction and how the incident stayed with you.

·         Explain any changes you made in your life as a result of your epiphany, and how you expect it to affect your actions and behaviors in the future.

·         It’s OK to be passionate about life-changing moments. In fact, passion will bring originality to your essay.

Writing a Winning Scholarship Essay

Standing out from the crowd of applicants is the key to winning a scholarship. That’s why it’s so important to write a solid essay. Your scholarship essay’s job is to help the selection committee learn about what makes you different. Through your essay, you can help convince the judges that they are making the right decision in awarding you the scholarship.

Brandon Howard writes on behalf of Bisk Education.

The Scholarship Blog

• There's Hope for the Average Student to Get Into College
• Is Going to an Elite College Worth the Cost?
• A Quest to Explain What Grades Really Mean - for High School Students
• Can You Tivo Your Way Through College?

Current Scholarships

• Don't miss another scholarship!

© 2018 ScholarshipMentor. All rights reserved.

Essay Papers Writing Online

Tips and strategies for crafting an outstanding scholarship essay.

Scholarship essays are an essential part of many scholarship applications. They provide an opportunity for you to showcase your personality, goals, and achievements to scholarship committees. Crafting a winning scholarship essay requires time, effort, and attention to detail. In this comprehensive guide, we will provide you with tips and strategies to help you write a compelling and successful scholarship essay that sets you apart from the competition.

From understanding the prompt to drafting your essay and polishing the final draft, we will walk you through each step of the process. You will learn how to identify key themes, structure your essay effectively, and highlight your strengths and experiences in a way that resonates with the scholarship committee. Whether you are a high school student applying for a local scholarship or a college student seeking a national award, this guide will equip you with the tools you need to create a standout scholarship essay.

The Importance of Scholarships

Scholarships play a crucial role in helping students achieve their educational goals. They provide financial assistance to deserving individuals who may not have the means to fund their education on their own. This support can make a significant difference in a student’s ability to pursue higher education and achieve their dreams.

Furthermore, scholarships not only alleviate the financial burden on students and their families but also promote academic excellence. By incentivizing students to strive for academic success, scholarships encourage individuals to work hard, stay motivated, and excel in their studies. This can lead to a more educated and skilled workforce, benefiting society as a whole.

In addition, scholarships can open doors to opportunities that would otherwise be out of reach for many students. They can provide access to top-tier universities, prestigious programs, and valuable experiences that can shape a student’s future and career prospects. Scholarships empower individuals to reach their full potential and pursue their passions without the constraints of financial limitations.

Overall, scholarships are not only important for individuals seeking to further their education but also for society as a whole. By investing in scholarships, we invest in the future of education, innovation, and progress. Scholarship recipients have the opportunity to make a positive impact on their communities and the world, thanks to the support and opportunities provided by scholarships.

Why You Should Apply

Applying for scholarships is a smart and strategic move for students looking to further their education. Here are a few reasons why you should take the time to apply:

• Financial Support: Scholarships offer a valuable source of funding that can help offset the cost of tuition, books, and other educational expenses.
• Merit Recognition: Winning a scholarship is a testament to your hard work, dedication, and academic achievements. It can boost your confidence and open up new opportunities.
• Reduced Debt: By securing scholarships, you can reduce the need for student loans and graduate with less debt, giving you a stronger financial foundation after graduation.
• Networking Opportunities: Many scholarship programs provide networking opportunities with other scholars, mentors, and industry professionals, helping you build valuable connections for the future.
• Personal Growth: The process of applying for scholarships forces you to reflect on your goals, achievements, and aspirations, fostering personal growth and self-improvement.

Overall, applying for scholarships is a worthwhile investment in your education and future success. Don’t miss out on the chance to secure the financial support and recognition you deserve!

Benefits of Winning

Winning a scholarship can offer numerous benefits to students, both academically and personally. Some of the key benefits include:

• Financial Assistance: Scholarships provide financial support for tuition, books, and other educational expenses, reducing the financial burden on students and their families.
• Recognition and Prestige: Winning a scholarship can enhance a student’s academic resume and demonstrate their merit to future employers and academic institutions.
• Opportunities for Growth: Scholarships often come with additional opportunities such as internships, networking events, and mentorship programs, which can help students develop their skills and build connections in their field.
• Increased Confidence: Achieving a scholarship can boost a student’s confidence and motivation, encouraging them to aim higher in their academic and personal goals.
• Debt Reduction: By receiving a scholarship, students can decrease their reliance on student loans and minimize the amount of debt they accumulate during their education.

Overall, winning a scholarship can have a transformative impact on a student’s educational journey, opening doors to new opportunities and providing valuable support along the way.

Key Elements in Scholarship Essays

Scholarship essays are crucial for securing financial aid for your education. To craft a winning scholarship essay, you must include key elements that showcase your unique qualities and experiences. These elements include:

1. Personal Story: Share a personal story that highlights your values, goals, and aspirations. This will help the scholarship committee get to know you better.

2. Relevance: Make sure your essay is relevant to the scholarship you are applying for. Tailor your essay to fit the requirements and objectives of the scholarship program.

3. Clear Structure: Organize your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Use transitions to connect your ideas smoothly.

4. Strong Thesis: Present a strong thesis statement that outlines the main point of your essay. This will guide your writing and keep your essay focused.

5. Unique Voice: Use your unique voice and perspective to stand out from other applicants. Avoid clichés and generic statements.

6. Proofreading: Proofread your essay carefully to eliminate errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. A polished essay shows your professionalism and attention to detail.

By incorporating these key elements into your scholarship essay, you can increase your chances of winning financial aid for your education.

Understanding the Prompt

One of the most crucial aspects of writing a winning scholarship essay is understanding the prompt. Take your time to carefully read and analyze the prompt provided by the scholarship committee. Pay attention to the key points and requirements outlined in the prompt, such as the essay topic, word limit, formatting guidelines, and any specific questions that need to be addressed.

Create a table or list to break down the prompt into manageable sections. Highlight the main themes or keywords that you should focus on in your essay. By understanding the prompt thoroughly, you can ensure that your essay directly addresses the criteria set by the scholarship committee and increases your chances of success.

Highlighting Your Achievements

When crafting a scholarship essay, it is crucial to highlight your achievements in a way that showcases your skills, talents, and accomplishments. Be sure to emphasize your academic achievements, extracurricular activities, community service involvement, leadership roles, and any awards or recognition you have received. Use specific examples and anecdotes to demonstrate the impact of your achievements and how they have shaped you as a person. By highlighting your achievements, you can effectively communicate your potential to the scholarship committee and increase your chances of receiving the scholarship.

Tips for Writing a Standout Essay

When it comes to crafting a winning scholarship essay, there are several key tips to keep in mind to ensure your essay stands out from the crowd:

Showing Your Unique Voice

When crafting a scholarship essay, it’s important to remember that you are the only person who can truly tell your story. Don’t be afraid to let your personality and voice shine through in your writing. This is your chance to stand out from the crowd and show the scholarship committee why you deserve to win.

Whether it’s through a unique storytelling style, a powerful personal anecdote, or a quirky sense of humor, find a way to make your essay memorable and engaging. Your essay should reflect who you are as a person, not just your accomplishments and achievements.

Use your own words and express your ideas in a way that is authentic and genuine. Your unique voice is what will make your essay memorable and resonate with the scholarship committee. Be yourself, and let your personality shine through in every word you write.

Structuring Your Essay Effectively

When it comes to crafting a winning scholarship essay, the structure is just as important as the content. Here are some tips on how to structure your essay effectively:

1. Introduction: Start your essay with a strong hook that grabs the reader’s attention. Introduce yourself and provide some background information about your achievements and goals.

2. Body paragraphs: Divide your essay into several paragraphs that each focus on a specific point or idea. Make sure to provide clear examples and evidence to support your arguments.

3. Conclusion: Summarize your main points and reiterate why you are the ideal candidate for the scholarship. End with a strong closing statement that leaves a lasting impression on the reader.

4. Editing: Before submitting your essay, make sure to proofread and edit it carefully. Check for grammar and spelling errors, as well as clarity and coherence in your writing.

By following these tips, you can structure your scholarship essay effectively and increase your chances of winning that coveted award!

Related Post

How to master the art of writing expository essays and captivate your audience, step-by-step guide to crafting a powerful literary analysis essay, convenient and reliable source to purchase college essays online, unlock success with a comprehensive business research paper example guide, unlock your writing potential with writers college – transform your passion into profession, “unlocking the secrets of academic success – navigating the world of research papers in college”, master the art of sociological expression – elevate your writing skills in sociology.

Home > Blog > Scholarship Essay Examples To Help You Get Accepted

Scholarship Essay Examples To Help You Get Accepted

• Smodin Editorial Team
• Updated: October 24, 2024
• General Guide About Content and Writing

Are you worried that your scholarship essay will not get you into your desired college? The scholarship application process can be tough, so you need the help you can get to increase your odds of success. Therefore, consider using the scholarship essay examples in this post to learn the best practices on how to get accepted.

We’ll show you how to structure the scholarship essay from start to finish and discuss essays on why you should receive a scholarship. Furthermore, we’ll offer the best practices and things to avoid. This means that by the end of this article, you’ll know exactly how to improve the overall quality of your scholarship essay.

So, let’s take a deep dive into the different scholarship essay examples to help you write your own.

Table of Contents

What Is a Scholarship Essay?

A scholarship essay is a written statement that applicants submit to scholarship committees as part of their application process. Its primary purpose is to showcase your qualifications, experiences, and aspirations. It will help reviewers understand why the candidate deserves financial support.

In crafting an effective scholarship essay, it’s important to address the specific prompt provided by the scholarship organization. This might be highlighting relevant experiences and values that align with the scholarship’s mission. A compelling narrative can set an applicant apart and emphasize unique perspectives in overcoming challenges.

Additionally, no matter the type of essay , your work should reflect clarity, coherence, and a strong writing style. It often includes a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. This summarizes the applicant’s journey and future ambitions.

Ultimately, a well-written scholarship essay communicates the candidate’s qualifications and conveys their passion and motivation. It makes for a persuasive case for why they should receive the scholarship.

What To Include in a Scholarship Essay

You’ll need to know what elements to include in your scholarship essay to get the best marks and potentially financial aid. After all, there are many scholarship essays that you have to compete with in order to get top grades.

Here are the main things you must include in your scholarship essay:

• Personal background: Share your background and experiences that shape who you are at the start of your essay . Furthermore, discuss your upbringing, family influences, and any challenges you have overcome.
• Academic achievements: Detail your academic accomplishments, such as GPA, relevant coursework, and honors. You’ll also need to mention any awards or recognitions you’ve received that showcase your dedication to learning.
• Extracurricular activities: Describe your involvement in extracurricular activities, such as clubs, sports, or volunteer work. Make sure to focus on leadership roles and significant contributions.
• Career goals: Clearly outline your career aspirations and how they relate to your educational path. Explain why you are passionate about your chosen field and how the scholarship will help you achieve your goals.
• Financial need: Address your financial situation honestly by explaining why you need the scholarship. Furthermore, discuss any challenges you face in funding your education, such as family circumstances or personal responsibilities.

5 Things To Avoid When Writing Scholarship Essays

There are a number of mistakes that you need to avoid making to ensure that your scholarship essays don’t fail. We have listed some of them below.

1. Neglecting the Prompt

Failing to address the specific scholarship prompt can result in a disqualified application. Each essay should directly respond to the provided questions or themes. Take time to understand what the scholarship committee is looking for and tailor your essay accordingly.

Ignoring the prompt can suggest a lack of attention to detail and commitment.

2. Using Cliches

Relying on cliches or overused phrases can make your essay feel generic and unoriginal. Therefore, avoid common statements like “I’ve always wanted to help people” without further elaboration.

Instead, share specific and personal experiences that illustrate your motivations.

3. Being Vague

General statements about your achievements or aspirations can dilute the impact of your essay. Instead of saying, “I want to make a difference,” provide concrete examples of how you plan to do so. Also, use specific anecdotes that illustrate your experiences and skills.

Clarity and detail help the committee understand your journey and intentions more deeply.

4. Surpassing the Word Limit

Staying within the word count limit is crucial, as exceeding it can lead to disqualification. Hence, avoid being overly verbose since it can dilute your message and bore the reader. Instead, focus on clarity and conciseness to ensure every word adds value to your narrative.

Making sure you stay within the word limit by shortening the essay is a great idea.

5. Being Overly Humble or Arrogant

Striking a balance between humility and confidence is essential. Therefore, avoid downplaying your achievements, since it can make you seem unworthy of the scholarship. Furthermore, excessive bragging can alienate readers. This means you’ll need to present your accomplishments and goals confidently, backed by concrete examples.

Ultimately, a balanced approach showcases your self-awareness and helps convey your genuine passion.

How To Structure a Scholarship Essay With Examples

Now let’s turn our attention to the process of writing scholarship essays with the help of examples. We share the scholarship essay writing tips that will help you create the right structure for your submission. This ensures that you don’t leave any of the important parts out when working on your scholarship applications.

Introduce Yourself

In the introduction, it’s essential to capture the reviewer’s attention while providing a glimpse into your background and aspirations. You might begin with a personal anecdote that reflects your motivations.

For instance, “Growing up in a small town, I often watched my parents work multiple jobs to support our family. Their sacrifices ignited my passion for education and my desire to pursue a career in engineering. Receiving this scholarship will not only help me financially but also empower me to achieve my dreams and contribute positively to my community and future generations.”

This immediately allows the reader to connect with your background and sets the context for the rest of the essay. Scholarship committees pay attention to background information more than you might think.

Provide Context and Background Information

Sharing your personal background allows the scholarship committee to understand the unique experiences that have shaped you. Therefore, describe your family situation, challenges, or significant life events. This improves the writing flow since it offers more context to the committee.

For example, “As the first member of my family to attend college, I have encountered various challenges throughout my educational journey. My parents immigrated to the U.S. with limited resources, and I often balanced my schoolwork with part-time jobs to support my family. These experiences have instilled in me a deep sense of resilience and determination.”

Showcase Educational Achievements

Highlighting your academic accomplishments is crucial in demonstrating your dedication to learning and your potential for success. Therefore, discuss your GPA , honors, and relevant coursework. Take the time to gather all of your academic achievements before writing to ensure that you leave nothing out.

You might write, “I maintained a GPA of 4.0 while taking advanced placement courses in math and science, earning recognition as a National Honor Society member. Additionally, I participated in a summer internship program at a local engineering firm. This is where I gained hands-on experience that solidified my interest in the field. My academic journey reflects my commitment to excellence and my drive to achieve my career aspirations in engineering.”

The focus on academic achievement here showcases that you have an interest in learning and will make the most of the course as a college student. Showing interest through evidence is one of the best ways to convince scholarship committees that you deserve your educational expenses paid for.

Discuss Extracurricular Activities

Extracurricular activities reveal your ability to take an interest in multiple things at once and show you are a well-rounded individual. Hence, you’ll need to describe your involvement and any significant roles.

For instance, “As president of the robotics club, I led a dedicated team of students in designing and building a competitive robot, which enhanced my leadership and collaboration skills. Furthermore, I volunteered at a local community center, where I tutored younger students in math. ”

This shows experience and development of different skills and highlights your leadership abilities. These kinds of experiences transfer well to the majority of courses that you will find at graduate school. Therefore, it’s a good idea to include to craft a winning essay.

Outline Your Career Goals

Clearly outlining your career goals demonstrates your vision for the future and how your education will help you achieve it. It’s a good idea to show your ambitions in this section to stand out from the other students seeking a college education.

For example, “My ultimate goal is to become a civil engineer specializing in sustainable infrastructure. I aspire to develop innovative solutions that address environmental challenges in urban areas. Receiving this scholarship will enable me to focus on my studies. I will gain the necessary skills and knowledge to make a meaningful impact in my community. Also, I wish to contribute to creating a more sustainable world for future generations.”

This shows that you have carefully thought about what you want to do with the degree, which gives you a sense of purpose. Are you unsure what your career goals are? Then perhaps you may want to take some time and think about that before completing this section.

Mention Why You Need Help With Finances

Addressing your financial needs and why you require scholarship money is important for the committee to understand why the scholarship is crucial. After all, most committees should focus on low-income students who need free money to take advantage of higher education. Therefore, make sure to outline your need for financial assistance to the scholarship provider.

For instance, “Due to my family’s financial constraints, I am concerned about the burden of college tuition. My parents are unable to contribute significantly to my education, and I have taken on multiple part-time jobs to save money. This scholarship would alleviate my financial stress and allow me to concentrate fully on my studies.

Write a Good Conclusion

Ensure you write a good conclusion . Summarize the key points and express gratitude for the opportunity. You may also want to leave some lasting thoughts that showcase your enthusiasm and desire. Highlight why getting these invaluable resources is paramount to your future goals.

For example, “In conclusion, I am committed to leveraging my education to create positive change in my community. This scholarship is not merely financial support, but it represents hope and a pathway to pursue my dreams. I am genuinely grateful for your consideration and the opportunity to apply for the scholarship. I look forward to the possibility of joining your college and contributing to its mission.”

10 Scholarship Essay Examples of Prompts

In this section, we’ll share the typical prompts you will come across when writing scholarship essays. This will help you set realistic expectations for the type of scholarship essay format you will need to work on. Hence, you can write better sentences in your essay and improve your chances of success.

The majority of scholarship opportunities require similar requirements, so these examples are a good place to start practicing. Most scholarship essays have similar prompts, so after this section you can avoid any surprises.

Keep reading for example prompts you might come across and how to approach them.

1. Discuss a Challenge You’ve Overcome

In response to this prompt, begin by describing a specific challenge or obstacle you faced in your life. This could be personal, academic, or financial. Then, clearly explain the context and significance of the challenge by focusing on how it affected you.

Next, outline the steps you took to overcome the challenge and the lessons you learned from the experience. Make sure to highlight the skills or qualities you developed. This might be resilience, determination, or problem-solving abilities.

Finally, connect this experience to your future goals to illustrate how it has shaped your character and prepared you for success in your academic endeavors.

2. Include in Your Essay Why You Should Receive This Scholarship

This prompt requires you to articulate your unique qualifications and reasons for deserving the scholarship. Start by reflecting on your academic achievements, extracurricular involvement, and personal experiences that make you a strong candidate. Additionally, be specific about how these experiences have prepared you for your educational journey.

Discuss your future goals and how the scholarship will help you achieve them. Make sure to link your aspirations to the mission of the scholarship organization. Additionally, emphasize your commitment to giving back to the community or making a positive impact in your field. This demonstrates your potential to be a valuable ambassador for the scholarship.

3. What Influences Have Shaped Your Life?

In this prompt, you’ll want to reflect on the significant influences that have shaped your values, beliefs, and aspirations. You can start by identifying key figures, experiences, or events that have played a pivotal role in your development.

This could include family members, mentors, or transformative experiences that inspired you. Additionally, describe how these influences have motivated you to pursue your educational goals and impacted your worldview.

Provide specific examples that illustrate the lessons learned and how they have guided your decisions. Finally, conclude by connecting these influences to your future aspirations, demonstrating how they continue to shape your path and drive you toward success.

4. What Does Community Service Mean to You?

When addressing this essay prompt, begin by defining what community service means to you personally. Reflect on your experiences and how they have influenced your understanding of service and civic responsibility. Then, discuss specific volunteer activities or projects you’ve participated in to highlight your roles and contributions.

It’s a good idea to explain how these experiences have impacted both you and the communities you served. You can emphasize the skills and values you gained through these activities, such as empathy, leadership, or teamwork.

Finally, connect your commitment to community service with your future goals. This effectively illustrates how you plan to continue making a difference in your community and beyond.

5. Describe a Leadership Experience

This essay prompt asks you to showcase leadership skills and experiences. Begin by describing a specific situation where you demonstrated leadership, whether in a formal role or through a personal initiative.

Clearly outline the context, your responsibilities, and the challenges you faced. Also, explain the actions you took to lead effectively and how you inspired or motivated others. Provide as much detail as possible to back up your case.

Additionally, reflect on the lessons you learned from this experience and how it has shaped your approach to leadership. This shows that you grew from the experience and can take the lessons learned into your academic and professional life.

6. How Have You Contributed to Your School or Community?

You can start by identifying specific contributions you have made to your school or community. Use specific examples to illustrate your commitment and the skills you’ve gained. Also, reflect on what motivated you to get involved and how these experiences have shaped your values.

Finally, you can conclude by connecting your contributions to future goals. This indicates your desire to continue serving and making a positive impact in your community and field of interest.

7. How Do You Handle Stress and Pressure?

You can tackle this prompt by discussing a specific instance where you faced stress or pressure. Also, you can explain the circumstances that contributed to the situation and your initial reactions.

Next, describe the strategies you employed to manage your stress, such as time management techniques, seeking support, or engaging in self-care practices. Make sure to highlight the positive outcomes of these strategies.

Finally, conclude by reflecting on how this experience has prepared you for future challenges, and your ability to handle stress as you pursue your education and career goals.

8. What Legacy Do You Hope to Leave?

Consider the impact you wish to have on others and the world around you when answering this essay prompt. You can begin by articulating your values and the principles that guide your actions. Also, reflect on the ways you’ve already begun to make an impact. This might be through volunteer work, leadership roles, or personal initiatives.

Furthermore, discuss the long-term vision you have for your contributions and the changes you hope to inspire. Highlight how your educational goals align with this vision and how receiving the scholarship will support your efforts.

9. What Challenges Do You See in Your Future Career?

Start by identifying potential challenges you anticipate in your future career path. These could include industry-specific issues, workplace dynamics, or personal obstacles. Then, discuss how you plan to navigate these challenges by summarizing the skills and strategies you will employ.

Additionally, reflect on any experiences you’ve had that have prepared you for overcoming obstacles. Make sure to emphasize your resilience and adaptability by demonstrating your readiness to face future hurdles.

10. Describe a Person Who Has Influenced Your Life

When addressing this scholarship essay prompt, choose a specific individual who has had a significant impact on your life. you’ll want to introduce this person and describe your relationship with them. Then, explain how their actions, values, or advice have influenced your decisions and aspirations.

Additionally, share specific anecdotes that illustrate their impact, whether through mentorship, support, or inspiration. This is a great way to show that you have learned from this individual and how it added to your character.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do i choose a topic for my scholarship essay.

Choosing a topic for your scholarship essay involves reflecting on your unique experiences, values, and aspirations. Therefore, consider writing about a significant challenge, a pivotal moment in your life, or your long-term goals.

Additionally, ensure the topic aligns with the scholarship’s focus and showcases your individuality. You’ll need to avoid generic themes since this will not help you stand out from the many other applicants.

What tone should I use in my scholarship essay?

The tone of your scholarship essay should be professional yet personal. Hence, aim for a conversational style that reflects your voice while maintaining formality. You’ll need to be sincere and authentic in expressing your thoughts and feelings.

Additionally, avoid overly casual language or cliches. Instead, balance enthusiasm for your goals with humility. Also, remember to be respectful and appreciative of the opportunity the scholarship represents.

How long should my scholarship essay be?

Scholarship essays typically range from 250 to 1,000 words, but it’s crucial to check the specific requirements for each scholarship. Make sure to adhere to any word limits provided, since exceeding them may lead to disqualification.

Also, focus on clarity and conciseness while ensuring you cover essential points effectively. If no limit is specified, then aim for a length that allows you to convey your message fully without unnecessary filler.

How do I make my scholarship essay stand out?

To make your scholarship essay stand out, share unique personal stories and insights that reflect your character and experiences. Also, use vivid imagery and specific examples to engage the reader.

You’ll also need to address the scholarship’s specific criteria and demonstrate how you embody those qualities. Make sure to be genuine and passionate about your goals. This ensures you don’t shy away from discussing challenges you’ve faced.

Can I reuse my scholarship essay for multiple applications?

While reusing essays can save time, it’s essential to customize each one for the specific scholarship you’re applying for. That’s because different scholarships have unique prompts and values, so ensure your essay aligns with their goals.

Additionally, tailor your content to highlight relevant experiences and aspirations that resonate with each scholarship’s mission. Generally, personalizing your essay will make a stronger impact and show the reviewers your genuine interest in this opportunity.

Write Your Scholarship Essay With Smodin AI

Increase your chances of getting into a scholarship program and getting financial aid by studying the examples in this article. The scholarship essay samples we shared showcase how you need to include a personal story to create a winning essay.

Furthermore, pay attention to the top things to avoid section, since this can lead to common writing mistakes that reduce your chances of successful scholarship applications. Scholarship essays stand out when they are not full of obvious mistakes you can avoid.

Do you want to improve the quality of your scholarship essay? Then use the Smodin AI Essay Writer to increase your odds of getting the financial aid you need. Our innovative AI tool allows you to generate winning scholarship essays for any prompt you receive. This will save you time when applying to many scholarships at once.

Use Smodin AI to craft your scholarship essay today!

What are your chances of acceptance?

Calculate for all schools, your chance of acceptance.

Your chancing factors

Extracurriculars.

How to Write a Personal Statement for a Scholarship + Examples

What’s covered:, what is the purpose of the scholarship personal statement, what to include in your personal statement, personal statement example: breakdown + analysis, how to make sure your writing is effective.

Either before or after you’ve gotten into your dream school, you’ll have to figure out how to pay for it. For most students, this involves a combination of financial aid, parent contributions, self-contributions, student loans, and scholarships/grants. Because scholarships are money out of someone else’s pocket that you never have to pay back, they are a great place to start!

Scholarships come in two forms: merit-based and need-based. Need-based scholarships are also often called grants. These designations tell you whether an organization looks at your financial situation when deciding about your scholarship.

Additionally, different scholarships fall under different categories based on the mission of the organization or person providing the scholarship’s financing. These missions typically emphasize different things like academic achievement, specific career goals, community service, leadership, family background, skill in the arts, or having overcome hardship. As you select scholarships to apply for and complete your applications, you should keep these missions in mind.

No matter what type of scholarship you are applying for, you will be asked to provide the review committee with standard materials. This includes your transcript, GPA, and resume/extracurriculars, but also, importantly, your personal statement. A scholarship personal statement is a bit different from your normal college essay, so we’ve put together this guide and some examples to help you get started!

The purpose of your personal statement is to help a review committee learn more about your personality, values, goals, and what makes you special. Ultimately, like with your college essays, you are trying to humanize your profile beyond your transcript, GPA, and test scores.

College essays all have one goal in mind (which is why you can apply to multiple schools at once through applications like the Common App or Coalition App): convince admissions officers that you would be a valuable addition to the university environment. The goal of your scholarship personal statement is different and differs more from one scholarship to the next. Rather than convincing various review committees that you are a generally good candidate for extra funding for college, you need to convince each review committee that your values have historically aligned with their organization’s mission and will continue to align with their organization’s mission.

Common missions amongst those who give scholarships include:

• Providing opportunities for students with career ambitions in a particular field
• Helping students who have experienced unexpected hardship
• Supporting students who show outstanding academic achievement
• Funding the arts through investing in young artists with strong technical skill
• Supporting the development of civic-minded community service leaders of the future
• Providing opportunities for historically underrepresented ethnic communities 

If a specific mission like this is outlined on an organization’s website or in the promotional material for its scholarship, the purpose of your personal statement is to show how you exemplify that mission.

Some scholarships ask for your personal statement to be guided by a prompt, while others leave things open for interpretation. When you are provided a prompt, it is obvious what you must do: answer the prompt. When you are not provided a prompt, you want to write a personal statement that is essentially a small-scale autobiography where you position yourself as a good investment. In either case, you should identify a focus or theme for what you are trying to say about yourself so that your application does not get lost in the shuffle.

Prompts include questions like:

• Why do you deserve this scholarship?
• How have you shown your commitment to (leadership/community service/diversity) in your community?
• When did you overcome adversity?
• Why is attending college important to you?

If you are provided a prompt, develop a theme for your response that showcases both your values and your achievements. This will help your essay feel focused and will subsequently help the review committee to remember which candidate you were as they deliberate.

Themes include things like:

• I deserve this community service scholarship because my compassion for intergenerational trauma has inspired me to volunteer with a local after-school program. I didn’t just sympathize. I did something about my sympathy because that’s the type of person I am. Within the program, I have identified avenues for improvement and worked alongside full-time staff to develop new strategies for increasing attendance.
• I overcame adversity when my mother had to have a major surgery two months after giving birth to my younger brother. I was just a kid but was thrown into a situation where I had to raise another kid. It was hard, but I’m the kind of person who tries to grow from hard times and, through my experience taking care of a baby, I learned the importance of listening to body language and nonverbal cues to understand the needs of others (baby and nonbaby, alike).

Without a prompt, clarity can be harder to achieve. That said, it is of the utmost importance that you find a focus. First, think about both your goals and your values.

Types of goals include:

• Career goals
• Goals for personal growth
• The type of friend you want to be
• The change you want to make in the world

Values could include:

• Authenticity
• And many more!

After you write out your goals/values, write out your achievements to see what goals/values you have “proof” of your commitment to. Your essay will ultimately be an exploration of your goal/value, what you have done about your goal/value in the past, and what you aspire to in the future.

You might be tempted to reflect on areas for improvement, but scholarships care about you living out your values. It is not enough to aspire to be exemplary in leadership, community service, or your academic field. For scholarships, you have to already be exemplary.

Finally, keep in mind that the review committee likely already has a copy of your extracurricular activities and involvement. Pick one or two accomplishments, then strive for depth, not breadth as you explore them.

My interest in the field of neuroscience began at a young age.  When I was twelve years old, my sister developed a condition called Pseudotumor Cerebri following multiple concussions during a basketball game.  It took the doctors over six months to make a proper diagnosis, followed by three years of treatment before she recovered.  During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions.  Later, my love of neuroscience was amplified when my mother began to suffer from brain-related health issues.  My mother had been a practicing attorney in Dallas for over twenty years.  She was a determined litigator who relentlessly tried difficult cases that changed people’s lives.  Now, she suffers from a cognitive impairment and is no longer able to practice law.  Oftentimes, she has headaches, she gets “cloudy,” her executive functioning slows down, she feels overwhelmed, and she forgets things.  My mother has gone from being the strong, confident, emotional and financial caretaker of our family to needing significant help on a daily basis. Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.

Due to my experiences with my mother and sister when I was in middle school, I knew that I wanted to make a difference in the field of neuroscience.  I also knew that, to obtain this goal, I needed to maintain superior grades in school while also pursuing opportunities outside of school to further my education.  In school, I was able to maintain superior grades to the point where I am currently valedictorian in a class of 567 students.  In addition, in school, I challenged myself by taking 16 Advanced Placement classes and 19 Honors classes.  Two of the most beneficial classes were AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research.  AP Capstone Seminar and AP Capstone Research are research-oriented classes where students are given the opportunity to pursue whatever track their research takes them down.  As a junior in AP Capstone Seminar, I researched the effects of harmful pesticide use on the prevalence of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) in children.  This year, as a senior in AP Capstone Research, I am learning about the effects of medical marijuana on the treatment of Multiple Sclerosis (MS).  

Outside of school, I furthered my education through taking advantage of the Duke TiP summer program. Duke TiP is a summer program run by Duke University where students who score extremely well on the SAT as middle schoolers are able to take college classes at different universities throughout the summers of their middle school and high school years.  I took advantage of this opportunity twice.  First, I went to Trinity University in San Antonio to expand my horizons and learn more about debate.  However, once I was done exploring, I decided I wanted to go into neuroscience.  This led me to take an Abnormal Psychology class at Duke University’s West Campus.  This class opened my eyes to the interaction between neuroscience and mental health, mental illness, and personality.  Years later, I am currently continuing my education outside of school as an intern at the University of Texas Dallas Center for Brain Health.  Through this internship, I have been able to see different aspects of neuroscience including brain pattern testing, virtual reality therapy, and longitudinal research studies.  With this background, I have positioned myself to be accepted by top neuroscience programs throughout the nation.  So far, I have been accepted to the neuroscience department of University of Southern California, the University of Virginia, the University of Texas, and Southern Methodist University, as well as the chemistry department at University of North Carolina–Chapel Hill.  

It is with this passion for neuroscience driven by my family and passion for education driven by internal motivation that I will set out to conquer my career objectives.  My educational aspirations consist of acquiring a bachelor’s degree in a biological or health science that would assist me in pursuing a medical career as a neuroscience researcher.  I decided to attain a career as a researcher since my passion has always been assisting others and trying to improve their quality of life.  After obtaining my Masters and my PhD, I plan to become a professor at a prestigious university and continue performing lab research on cognitive disorders.  I am particularly interested in disorders such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD).  In the lab, I hope to find different therapies and medications to help treat the 3.5 million people around the world suffering from ASD.  Furthermore, I want to contribute back to underserved populations that struggle because they do not have as much access to medical assistance as other privileged groups.  As such, I hope to do a part of my research in less developed or developing Spanish-speaking countries. This will also allow me to pursue my love of Spanish while pursuing my love of neuroscience.  I think that following such a career path will provide me the opportunity to learn about the medical needs of the autistic community and improve their quality of health.  Furthermore, I hope to train a new generation of students to strive to research and make comparable discoveries.  Whether it be through virtual reality labs or new drug discoveries, I believe that research leads to innovation which leads to a brighter future. 

This student does a great job of making themself appear competent and dedicated to the field of neuroscience. This is primarily because they provided tangible evidence of how they have pursued their dedication in the past—through their AP Capstone courses, their Abnormal Psychology class at Duke TiP, and their internship at UTD. There is no doubt in the mind of a reader that this student is high-achieving. 

This student also engages successfully with a past-future trajectory, where they end with a vision of how they will continue to use neuroscience in the future. This helps the review committee see what they are investing in and the ways that their money will go to good use.

This student has two major areas for improvement. As we have said, the purpose of a personal statement is for a student to humanize themself to a review committee. This student struggles to depict themself separately from their academic achievements. A solution to this would be for the student to establish a theme towards the beginning of their essay that relates to both their values as a human and their achievements.

At the beginning of the essay, the student explores how their interest in neuroscience began. They explain their interest through the following sentences: “During this time, my love for neuroscience was sparked as I began to research her condition and, then, other neurocognitive conditions” and “Once again, with this illness came a lot of research on my part — research that encouraged me to pursue my dreams of exploring neuroscience.” The student made the great decision to tell the backstory of their interest, but they described their research in very mundane and redundant terms. Instead, they could have focused on their value of intellectual curiosity as a magnetic force that encouraged them to research their mother and sister’s ailments. Curiosity, then, could serve as a value-related thematic throughline to taking AP Capstone classes, taking college courses during the summer that weren’t required, and interning before even graduating high school.

A second area for improvement would be avoiding statistics. As the student identifies their valedictorian status and the number of AP classes they have taken, they might turn away certain personalities on a review committee by appearing braggy. Even further, these statistics are a waste of space. The review committee already has access to this information. These words distract from the major theme of the essay and would have been better used to humanize the student.

Throughout my academic career, I have been an avid scholar, constantly pushing myself towards ambitious goals. I held and continue to hold myself to a high standard, enrolling myself in rigorous curriculum, including Honors and Advanced Placement courses to stretch my mental potential. During my junior year of high school, I took four AP tests, two on the same day, and earned the AP Scholar with Honor Award. Additionally, I received the Letter of Commendation for the PSAT/NMSQT, and qualified for Rotary Top 100 Students both my freshman and senior year, a sign of my commitment to my studies. However, school has not been all about having the best GPA for me; beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem. I always give each class my best effort and try my hardest on every assignment. My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result. It is a major goal of mine to continue to aspire towards a high level of achievement regarding future educational and occupational endeavors; I plan on continuing this level of dedication throughout my educational career and implementing the skills I have learned and will learn into my college experience and beyond.

This fall, I will begin attending the University of California Los Angeles as an English major. I chose this major because I am fascinated by written language, especially its ability to convey powerful messages and emotions. I also enjoy delving into the works of other authors to analyze specific components of their writing to discover the meaning behind their words. In particular, I cannot wait to begin in-depth literary criticism and learn new stylistic techniques to add more depth to my writing. Furthermore, I recently went to UCLA’s Bruin Day, an event for incoming freshmen, where I was exposed to many different extracurriculars, some of which really piqued my interest. I plan on joining the Writing Success Program, where I can help students receive free writing help, and Mock Trial, where I can debate issues with peers in front of a real judge. The latter, combined with a strong writing background from my undergraduate English studies will be extremely beneficial because I plan to apply to law school after my undergraduate degree. As of now, my career goal is to become a civil rights lawyer, to stand up for those who are discriminated against and protect minority groups to proliferate equality.

As a lawyer, I wish to utilize legislation to ameliorate the plight of the millions of Americans who feel prejudice and help them receive equity in the workplace, society, and so on. Though this seems a daunting task, I feel that my work ethic and past experience will give me the jumpstart I need to establish myself as a successful lawyer and give a voice to those who are often unheard in today’s legal system. I have been a Girl Scout for over a decade and continually participate in community service for the homeless, elderly, veterans, and more. My most recent project was the Gold Award, which I conducted in the Fullerton School District. I facilitated over ten workshops where junior high students taught elementary pupils STEM principles such as density and aerodynamics via creative activities like building aluminum boats and paper airplanes. I also work at Kumon, a tutoring center, where I teach students to advance their academic success. I love my job, and helping students from local schools reach their potential fills me with much pride.

Both being a Girl Scout and working at Kumon have inspired me to help those in need, contributing significantly to my desire to become a lawyer and aid others. My extracurriculars have allowed me to gain a new perspective on both learning and teaching, and have solidified my will to help the less fortunate. In college, I hope to continue to gain knowledge and further develop my leadership skills, amassing qualities that will help me assist others. I plan to join multiple community service clubs, such as UCLA’s local outreach programs that directly aid residents of Los Angeles. I want to help my fellow pupils as well, and plan on volunteering at peer tutoring and peer editing programs on campus. After college, during my career, I want to use legal tactics to assist the underdog and take a chance on those who are often overlooked for opportunities. I wish to represent those that are scared to seek out help or cannot afford it. Rather than battling conflict with additional conflict, I want to implement peaceful but strong, efficient tactics that will help make my state, country, and eventually the world more welcoming to people of all ethnic and socioeconomic backgrounds. These goals are close to my heart and therefore I will be as diligent as I am passionate about them. My perseverance and love for learning and community service drive my ambition in both education and life as a whole, and the drive to make the world a better place is one that I will carry with me for my entire life.

This student emphasizes two values in this essay: hard work and community service. These are values that go together nicely, and definitely make sense with this student’s end goal of becoming a civil rights lawyer! That said, some changes could be made to the way the student presents their values that would make their personal statement more convincing and engaging.

Structurally, instead of using a past-future trajectory, this student starts by explaining their academic achievements, then explains their career goals, then explains their history of community service, then explains their future desires for community service. This structure loses the reader. Instead, the student should have started with either the past or the future. 

This could look like 1) identifying their career goals, 2) explaining that hard work and a commitment to community service are necessary to get there, and 3) explaining that they aren’t worried because of their past commitment to hard work and community service. Or it could look like 1) providing examples of their hard work and community service in the past, then 2) explaining how those values will help them achieve their career goals.

Additionally, like with our other example, this student shows a heavy investment in statistics and spouting off accomplishments. This can be unappealing. Unfortunately, even when the student recognizes that they are doing this, writing “beyond the numbers, I have a deep drive to learn which motivates me to do well academically. I truly enjoy learning new things, whether it be a new essay style or a math theorem,” they continue on to cite their achievements, writing “My teachers have noticed this as well, and I have received school Lancer Awards and Student of the Month recognitions as a result.” They say they are going beyond the numbers, but they don’t go beyond the awards. They don’t look inward. One way to fix this would be to make community service the theme around which the essay operates, supplementing with statistics in ways that advance the image of the student as dedicated to community service.

Finally, this student would be more successful if they varied their sentence structure. While a small-scale autobiography can be good, if organized, every sentence should not begin with ‘I.’ The essay still needs to be engaging or the review committee might stop reading.

Feedback is ultimately any writer’s best source of improvement! To get your personal statement edited for free, use our Peer Review Essay Tool . With this tool, other students can tell you if your scholarship essay is effective and help you improve your essay so that you can have the best chances of gaining those extra funds!

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts