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Make a good first impression: Expert tips for showing up at your best
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First impressions matter: here’s why
9 tips for making a great first impression, dos and don’ts of first impressions, how to recover from making a bad first impression.
Did you know that a single glance at a person's face is enough to form a first impression? Research shows that it takes between just 33–100 milliseconds for someone to form judgments about your character .
Such a short amount of time is clearly not enough to accurately gauge a person’s character. But it’s only natural for us to make assumptions about someone when we first meet them.
We also get attached to our initial impressions of others and find it difficult to change our opinion. Even when presented with contrasting evidence.
As the old saying goes, you never get a second chance to make a great first impression.
Read on to learn why first impressions are so powerful and how to make a good first impression that will last.
What are first impressions?
We form a not-always-accurate opinion about many of a person’s qualities when we first meet them. Some of the qualities we try to gauge include a person’s friendliness, honesty, trustworthiness , and competence .
A first impression becomes a filter that we use for all future interactions with that person. It can be very difficult to change someone’s first impression of us.
First impressions last. Whether they are accurate or not, it normally takes a long time and concerted effort to change a first impression.
Because they are largely subconscious, first impressions are very persistent. Even in the face of contrary evidence. Because of our implicit biases and cognitive biases , we see the world and other people through our own set of filters and make decisions based on them.
All of your relationships are affected by the first impression that you make.
If people’s first impression of you is that you are friendly, competent, and trustworthy , they are more likely to feel comfortable around you. They are then more likely to consider you a friend and open up to you.
People you meet are also more likely to remember you and recommend you to their friends and coworkers . Because of this, making a good first impression impacts your networking .
This kind of social capital can have far-reaching effects on both your personal and professional life. Other people will spread their good opinions about you.
If the first impression that you create includes competency, this will instill confidence in others of your abilities and skills. They are more likely to trust that you can perform the tasks assigned to you and achieve the goals that have been set .
This can provide you with greater latitude in how you perform your tasks and achieve your goals .
On their own, each of the above is a good example of why first impressions matter. When you combine their effects, a good first impression becomes even more important. Creating a good first impression can generate a lot of personal power.
A good first impression also tends to provide opportunities. Potential customers would be more likely to become actual customers. Referrals through networking can result in new job offers.
And a good first impression can improve our chances of promotion when you’re evenly matched on skills and experience with other applicants.
Now that we’ve covered why first impressions are so important, here are some tips to nail that first meeting.
1. Make eye contact
Eye contact is a nonverbal form of communication . Making eye contact is taken as a show of honesty and as a way of showing respect to the person that you are talking to. Maintaining eye contact also shows that you’re paying attention to the other person and listening to what they are saying .
Try to make eye contact before you start talking, and maintain regular eye contact during your conversation . You do, however, need to know the difference between eye contact and staring someone down.
In her book, How To Talk To Anyone , Leil Lowndes recommends a 60/40 mix , with 60% eye contact being the ideal goal to indicate paying attention without aggression.
A sincere smile puts people at ease and makes people feel welcome.
A genuine smile reaches your eyes and creates an impression of trust and sincerity . If your smile reaches your eyes, it will be seen even if you are wearing a mask.
If you feel a tightening of the muscles around your eyes, you know that your smile shows in your eyes.
3. Dress for the occasion
What you wear greatly contributes to your first impression. Caroline Dunn and Lucette Charette of The National Research Council of Canada found that “ People are affected by your appearance, whether or not they realize it , and whether or not they think appearance is important.”
In short, what you wear has consequences.
Make sure that your clothing is appropriate for the situation. Dressing too casually for a job interview is likely to create the impression that you aren’t serious about the job.
4. Be authentic
People can be remarkably quick to pick up on insincerity, so it pays to be yourself .
Constant worry about whether you are saying or doing the right thing often comes across as insincerity as well.
Being authentic means knowing your strengths and weaknesses and communicating them in a considerate way .
5. Be a good communicator
A good communicator listens more than they talk . A good guideline for this is to talk only a third as much as you listen.
Listening more shows that you are being attentive and lets the other person feel heard.
As founder of First Impressions Ann Demarais points out, people always remember how you made them feel . If you communicate clearly and listen well , people will enjoy their interactions with you.
6. Use positive body language
Body language is a large part of communication. Some basic guidelines for positive body language are:
- Stand or sit up straight, and hold your head up. You will present yourself as comfortable and confident.
- Avoid crossing your arms or legs. This subconsciously closes you off from the other person.
- Offer your hand for a good, firm handshake that is confident but not crushing.
7. Be empathetic
Pay attention to the emotional well-being of the person that you are talking to.
Empathizing with someone can contribute to a strong connection. It demonstrates that you understand them emotionally.
8. Do your research and come prepared
Doing some basic research can help you understand the context and environment that you will be in.
It can help you dress appropriately and guide you to the formality of language that will be suitable. You may also discover information about other people you can use to start a conversation with them.
Preparing beforehand will make you feel more at ease and will also show that you are interested and focused .
9. Act confidently
Acting confident, even if you don’t feel brave , will create an impression of confidence. This appearance of self-assurance will contribute to a better first impression.
Here are some general customs to follow for a first meeting to ensure you make a good impression.
- Be overbearing. This is often the result of talking too much and not listening enough. This creates the impression that you aren’t interested in the other person or what they have to say.
- Interrupt when others talk. In many cultures, interrupting someone comes across as very rude. Not only does it communicate that you aren’t really listening, it often upsets the interrupted person.
It also creates the impression that you are more interested in hearing yourself speak and value your own opinion more than that of others.
- Be constantly on your phone. Once in a while, we should all take a digital detox to overcome our device dependence. If you are constantly on your phone, you create the impression that you aren’t paying attention. It also communicates that you aren’t interested in the other person.
- Try too hard. Trying too hard is often obvious and makes you seem insincere. It can create the sense that you are prepared to do almost anything to create a good impression, even if that means overstating your abilities.
- Read the room. Taking a moment to read a room gives you time to gather yourself. It can also guide your behavior by providing contextual information about levels of formality and language style.
- Use different types of listening. Understanding and using the different types of listening enable you to communicate more effectively.
Other people will pick up on whether you are an effective listener or not. This will contribute to their impression of you.
- Be optimistic. Being optimistic will contribute to a positive atmosphere. People enjoy being around optimists. A sense of cheerfulness will have a positive effect on the impression that you create.
- Ask open and closed questions. Asking open questions shows that you’re interested and attentive. Asking closed questions shows that you focus on what’s important.
Here are some ideas for questions you can ask:
- What led you to this career?
- What’s the most exciting part of your job and why?
- What’s one professional skill you’re currently working on?
- Who inspires you?
- Where did you work before this position?
- Do you have any hobbies?
- What’s your favorite thing to do on the weekends?
- What’s something you’re proud of?
By asking a mix of open and closed questions, you show others that you have these skills, which builds a positive first impression.
Overcoming a bad first impression can sometimes seem like an almost impossible task.
It just takes consistent effort and time. Below are some guidelines to get you started in overcoming a bad first impression.
Accept the bad first impression and identify where you went wrong
Only by accepting the bad first impression can you begin to identify where you went wrong.
Self-awareness will help you identify what you need to do differently and why. Once you have identified where you went wrong (or what went wrong), you can take corrective action.
Admit your mistake and apologize if necessary
Admitting your mistake to yourself can often be the hardest part. But after that, admitting your error to others is easier.
Important to remember is that just because you made a bad first impression, it doesn’t mean it was always you or your fault. What is important is being able to identify what went wrong, not beat yourself up over it.
Apologizing for your mistake (if necessary) shows that you are aware and interested in improving the person’s first impression of you. An apology can go a long way to overcoming a bad first impression.
Focus on the future
Don’t dwell on the bad first impression. Once you have accepted and admitted it, focus on the actions you are going to take to improve the first impression.
Dwelling on the bad first impression will only make it harder for you to recover from it.
Be consistent with your positive actions
It’s important to be consistent with your positive actions. Your consistency will show sincerity.
You also need to be consistent because, unfortunately, any lapse in your positive actions will reinforce the bad first impression.
Make your first impression count
A good first impression can provide many benefits. It offers you advantages, both short and long term, in your personal and professional life.
The guidelines above can set you on the path to mastering the art of creating a good first impression. With attention to detail and practice, you can create an impression that lasts. For all the right reasons.
For assistance and support in developing these and other skills, talk to our coaches at BetterUp . We’re here to help you excel.
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Elizabeth Perry, ACC
Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.
Learn how to introduce yourself: examples to make a good impression
Send an email before your first day of work to make a good impression, phone screen interviews: what to do before, during, and after, how to answer “what are your weaknesses” with ease, 6 networking tips to help you make a lasting impression, 11 interview tips to boost your confidence, eye contact is important (crucial really) in communication, 15 questions to ask at the end of an interview to impress recruiters, 25 unique email sign-offs to make a good impression, impression management: developing your self-presentation skills, video interviews are here to stay: how to adapt on camera, how to ace your first meeting with a new team, the unspoken language of business casual clothing, ace your first day on the job with 15 confidence-building tips, how to carry a conversation — the art of making connections, make the connection: 10 effective ways to connect with people, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..
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10 Ways to Make a Positive First Impression during Presentations
first impressions
presentation tips
Sep 11, 2014
We’re often told not to judge a book by its cover.
But as science has proven time and again, first impressions count for a lot more than we’re ready to admit.
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While it’s not ideal, we all form initial opinions based on the most arbitrary things. Researchers even found that it only takes us a few seconds to judge someone we just met.
As the old saying goes, you won’t get a second chance to make a first impression. Here are 10 ways to make sure your presentations start off right:
Arrive early
Time is valuable, so make sure you don’t make anyone wait. The people in your audience took a few moments from their busy schedules to listen to your presentation. Respect that and always be the first one to arrive at the venue.
Look your best
According to the University of Hertfordshire’s Professor Karen Pine and her colleagues, first impressions are largely based on physical appearance , so you have to look your best. Make sure you’re wearing clothes that are appropriate for the occasion. The general rule is to always dress a little bit better than the audience would.
Mind your body language and non-verbal cues
As we’ve established previously , you can say a lot without saying anything at all. When facing an audience, it’s important to keep in mind the non-verbal cues you’re giving off. Avoid gestures that look closed off or defensive. Strengthen your connection with the audience by maintaining constant eye-contact.
Shake off your nerves
It’s hard to project confidence if presentations makes you feel anxious. Before taking the stage, take a moment to calm yourself by doing breathing exercises. You can also try to pump yourself up by listening to your own power music .
Of course, there’s no better way to show off a positive attitude than through a sincere smile. Don’t forget to flash a big smile the moment you step up to face your audience.
Start strong
Create an emotional connection with your audience as soon as you begin your presentation. To capture their attention, try to come up with a creative way to open your speech. Sims Wyeth of INC.com made a list of a few techniques that you can try.
Know your presentation well
Aside from a positive attitude, it’s also important to exude a feeling of trustworthiness. To do that, you need to know your presentation well. Prepare everything you need long before you’re scheduled to present. Most importantly, take the time to rehearse your presentation as much as you can.
Handle interruptions and difficult questions with grace
They say that we tend to reveal our “true self” during high-stress situations. During a presentation, you could end up facing a situation you didn’t prepare for . Whether it’s a heckler trying to get a rise out of you or a question you don’t have an answer for, always remain calm and keep your composure.
Avoid presentation clichés
Sometimes, first impressions are also formed based on previous experiences. Set yourself apart from all those bad presentations that people continue to see. Avoid committing common presentation mistakes such as bad PowerPoint decks and reading directly from your slides.
Be genuine and enjoy your time on stage
It’s important to put your best foot forward during a presentation. But it’s also crucial to be yourself and enjoy your time on stage. Sincerity comes easier when you’re not putting up a front. Be yourself, enjoy, and give your best as you present.
After a few conversations, you’ll be able to get to know one another on a deeper and more personal level. Unfortunately, this won’t be the case when you have to face an audience and deliver a presentation. Especially for big events, your audience will mostly be made up of people you’ve never met before.
That could be about 50 different individuals hastily judging the way you look, speak, and even stand. How can you make your message count if the audience has already decided that you’re sloppy, untrustworthy, and unprofessional?
References:
Rowh, Mark. “ First Impressions Count .” American Psychological Association . Accessed September 11, 2014. Pine, Karen J., Fletcher Howett, and Neil Howett. “ The Effect of Appearance on First Impressions .” Karen Pine . Accessed September 11, 2014.
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Featured Image: anthony kelly via Flickr
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