how to get my 5th grader to do homework

Ten Homework Motivation Strategies for Children and Teens

Use these 10 strategies to end the homework wars..

Posted September 6, 2015 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan

When it comes to homework, parents get burnt out hearing these hollow and suspicious words: "I did it at school," "They didn't give homework today," "It hardly counts for my grade," "My teacher never looks at my homework anyway," "That assignment was optional." As parents, hearing these words is enough to drive you crazy.

As I write in my book, 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child , parents must not let their emotions get the best of them when their kids are not getting homework done. The strategies below are for helping your child or teen get unstuck:

• Nix the nagging! Pestering creates an adversarial, shaming dynamic that backfires. Instead, try my Calm, Firm, and Non-Controlling approach. Gently empower your child or teen by supportively saying, "I see that you are frustrated. Let's think of ways to help you get back on track with your homework/schoolwork."
• Encourage effort over perfection. Be mindful that kids tend to get intimidated when they have a hard time understanding material. They may get into negative self-talk like, "I can't do this." Even if they're truly thinking this way, parents may instead hear comments like, "I hate this." or "This is stupid." Remind your child or teen that doing his best effort is better than not doing it at all.
• Prioritize. Coach and encourage that the order that homework is done based on urgency, complexity, and workload. At the same time, realize that some students do better by starting with easier tasks and that this can help spark them to tackle more demanding assignments.
• Break it down. Reinforce breaking up homework time into manageable chunks and encourage taking regular breaks. Encourage moving around and walking away for a bit. Remind that an apple really does provide the same effect, and is healthier than an energy drink.
• Think "15 minutes of pain." Have the student set a timer for only 15 minutes. Keep it lighthearted and explain that even if it "hurts" doing the work, she can stop after 15 minutes. Like most things in life, once we push ourselves and get going, it's not so bad.
• Don't be consequence ravenous. Imposing consequences for homework not being done can backfire with defiant behavior. If you use consequences, don't present them with yelling. Keep them reasonable and ask the student to help you be able to move towards rewards (don't go overboard) and minimize consequences. Remember that real, natural consequences are the best motivators.
• Encourage connection. Encourage the student to make or re-establish a connection with his teacher. I have seen hundreds of kids "shoot themselves in the foot" with incomplete homework if they don't have a decent relationship with their teacher.
• Change up the homework/study surroundings. Try putting an inspirational poster by the desk, moving to a different room, or silencing the cell phone. New changes can create more changes.
• Use those study halls. Encourage the use of them as much as possible. Some kids lose sight of that more done at school, means less to do at home.
• Allow for some fun. Notice if your student is racing through the homework just to have fun. Fun time like, TV, phone time, or surfing the web, is welcome, but make sure you put limits on it.

Jeffrey Bernstein, Ph.D. , is a psychologist and the author of seven books, including 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child.

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An Age-By-Age Guide to Helping Kids Manage Homework

Do you ever wonder whether homework is gauging the child’s ability to complete assignments or the parent’s? On one end of the spectrum, a parent might never mention homework and assume it gets done independently; on the other end are the parents who micromanage to be sure every worksheet is absolutely perfect.

Being too laissez faire about homework might deny a child the support they need to develop executive functioning skills, but being too involved could stifle their independence. So how much parent participation in homework is actually appropriate throughout a child’s education?

Basic homework tips

According to Scholastic , you should follow these rules of thumb to support your child during homework (without going overboard):

Stay nearby and available for questions without getting right in the middle of homework.

Avoid the urge to correct mistakes unless your child asks for help.

Instead of nagging, set up a homework routine with a dedicated time and place.

Teach time management for a larger project by helping them break it into chunks.

Child psychologist Dr. Emily W. King recently wrote about rethinking homework in her newsletter. King explains at what ages kids are typically able to do homework independently, but she writes that each child’s ability to concentrate at the end of the day and use executive functioning skills for completing tasks is very individual. I talked to her for more information on how much parental involvement in homework completion is needed, according to a child’s age and grade level.

Kindergarten to second grade

Whether children even need homework this early is a hot debate. Little ones are still developing fine motor skills and their ability to sit still and pay attention at this age.

“If a child is given homework before their brain and body are able to sit and focus independently, then we are relying on the parent or other caregivers to sit with the child to help them focus,” King said. “ Think about when the child is able to sit and focus on non-academic tasks like dinner, art, or music lessons. This will help you tease out executive functioning skills from academic understanding.”

Elementary-age children need time for unstructured play and structured play like music, arts, and sports. They need outside time, free time, and quiet time, King said. For children who are not ready for independent work, nightly reading with another family member is enough “homework,” she said.

Third to fifth grades

Many children will be able to do homework independently in grades 3-5. Even then, their ability to focus and follow through may vary from day to day.

“Most children are ready for practicing independent work between third and fifth grade, but maybe not yet in the after-school hours when they are tired and want to rest or play. We need to begin exposing children to organization and structure independently in late elementary school to prepare them for more independence in middle school,” King said.

Neurodivergent kids may need more parental support for several years before they work independently.

“Neurodivergent children, many of whom have executive functioning weaknesses, are not ready to work independently in elementary school. Children without executive functioning weaknesses (e.g., the ability to remain seated and attend to a task independently) are able to do this somewhere between third and fifth grade, but it’s very possible they can work independently at school but be too tired to do it later in the afternoon,” King said. “We need to follow the child’s skills and give them practice to work independently when they seem ready. Of course, if a child wants to do extra work after school due to an interest, go for it.”

For students who are not ready to work independently in middle school, it is better to reduce the amount of homework they are expected to complete so they can practice independence and feel successful.

Middle school

In sixth grade and later, kids are really developing executive functioning skills like planning, organizing, paying attention, initiating, shifting focus, and execution. They will still need your encouragement to keep track of assignments, plan their time, and stick to a homework routine.

“Middle school students need lots of organization support and putting systems in place to help them keep track of assignments, due dates, and materials,” King said.

High school

By this point, congratulations: You can probably be pretty hands-off with homework. Remain open and available if your teen needs help negotiating a problem, but executing plans should be up to them now.

“In high school, parents are working to put themselves out of a job and begin stepping back as children take the lead on homework. Parents of high schoolers are ‘homework consultants,’” King said. “We are there to help solve problems, talk through what to say in an email to a teacher, but we are not writing the emails or talking to the teachers for our kids.”

What if homework is not working for them (or you)

There are a number of reasons a child might not be managing homework at the same level as their peers, including academic anxiety and learning disabilities.

If your child is showing emotional distress at homework time, it might be a sign that they have run out of gas from the structure, socialization, and stimulation they have already been through at school that day. One way to support kids is to teach them how to have a healthy balance of work and play time.

“When we ask students to keep working after school when their tank is on empty, we likely damage their love of learning and fill them with dread for tomorrow,” King wrote in her newsletter.

King said in her experience as a child psychologist, the amount of homework support a child needs is determined by their individual abilities and skills more than their age or grade level.

“All of these steps vary for a neurodivergent child and we are not following these guidelines by age or grade but rather by their level of skills development to become more independent,” she said. “In order to independently complete homework, a child must be able to have attended to the directions in class, brought the materials home, remember to get the materials out at home, remember to begin the task, understand the task, remain seated and attention long enough to complete the task, be able to complete the task, return the work to their backpack, and return the work to the teacher. If any of these skills are weak or the child is not able to do these independently, there will be a breakdown in the system of homework. You can see why young students and neurodivergent students would struggle with this process.”

If you and your child have trouble meeting homework expectations, talk to their teacher about what could be contributing to the problem and how to modify expectations for them.

“Get curious about your child’s skill level at that time of day,” King said. “Are they able to work independently at school but not at home? Are they not able to work independently any time of day? Are they struggling with this concept at school, too? When are they successful?”

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Parents Point of View #105: How to Help My Struggling 5th Grader

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In many schools, fifth grade is the last school year of elementary school. It is also a time when kids’ homework gets more complicated, and their learning struggles, especially in math, writing, and reading comprehension, become more profound. At kids on the Yard, we are determined to help your child keep up and excel in fifth-grade learning. That is why our educational team of experts took the time to answer some of the top questions from fifth-grade parents.

“ Why does my ADHD hate reading? “ Concern parent, TX

“H ow can I get my fifth grader excited about reading? “ Concern parent, OH

“How can I tell if my 5 th grader needs math help?” Concern parent, FL

“How do I help my 5th grader who is struggling in math??” Concern parent, TX

“How can I get my fifth grader excited about reading?” Concern parent, CA

Why does my 5 th grader struggle so much with writing? Concern parent, OR

If you are a fifth-grade parent who is helplessly watching your child struggle in READING comprehension, WRITING, and MATH questions comprehension , we got you! In this article, our team of educators provides answers to the most asked questions on the above-mentioned struggles.

Contact us if your question is not answered in this category, or you need further clarification

Why does my ADHD hate reading?

It is most probable that your child does not hate reading but rather hates the idea of quietly reading or sitting down for long without an exciting activity. What your child needs is a reading session that is characterized by multisensory stimulation and action.

How can my fifth grader be a fluent reader?

Be a model of fluent reading by reading fluently to your child or playing audios that have fluent and engaging reading. Please help them to read complex phrases often to improve their familiarity with hard words. You can also help your child practice fluency through timed reading. Engage them in reading games and activities.

How can I get my fifth grader excited about reading?

Learn your child’s interest and allow them to read what they love. Stock your bookshelves with books about their interests. Set a time for reading to formulate a reading culture. Read the same book with your child and later share and discuss its content. Keep bringing new books on diverse subjects to heighten their curiosity.

My fifth grader is dyslexic. How do I improve her reading abilities?

Let her listen to audiobooks as a way of improving their comprehension of content written in books. Allow them to type on a tablet or computer as an alternative to writing. Using learning apps that help them understand decoding in a fun way. Your child can also use a ruler to read in a straight line successfully.

My 5th grader enjoys writing. How can I make him a better writer?

Provide them with daily writing instructions to facilitate more practice. Provide them a good writing space and all the necessary writing tools. Take them to writing conferences and give them opportunities to meet their writing mentors. Provide them with many reading materials to get enough reference materials. Realize that poor writing mechanics does not mean your child is a bad writer: Work more on improving their word choice, transition, opening, and concluding paragraph

My 5th grader writing skills are still very low. Why is that the case?

Your child’s writing struggle could be caused by: poor language skills, poor handwriting and spelling, poor writing struggles, and poor fine motor skills. It could also be caused by limited guidance and instructions, little motivation, insufficient attention and focus, and some form of learning disabilities.

How do I help my 5th grader overcome her writing shortcomings?

Keep encouraging your child to write until it becomes a natural process. Secondly, teach and oversee their work. You can hire a tutor if your schedule is too tight. Praise them for effort and always give helpful feedback without applying negative criticism. Give your child freedom to write what they enjoy and are confident in.

How should a 5th-grade paragraph look?

A 5th grader paragraph should have at least three sentences or more and must not take over half of the page. The section should contain a topic or opening sentence, a detailed sentence\s, and a closing sentence. Fifth graders should also know how to use caps, spell about 90% of words, and effectively use punctuations, among other basic writing rules.

What are the signs of math anxiety in a 5th grader?

A child with math anxiety may have sweaty and clammy hands when doing their homework or tackling a math problem. They may avoid doing math or fail to respond to some questions. You may notice negative talk towards the subject and intense reactions whenever in a math class. Other symptoms may include lightheadedness, increased heart rate, and an upset stomach.

What math milestone should I expect from my fifth grader?

Fifth graders should apply some of the math concepts in real life and use more than one method to solve a math problem. They should be able to use the ‘greater than’ and ‘lower than’ symbols. Fifth graders should also understand fractions and decimals better and successfully arrange them in a descending or ascending order. They should successfully round-off numbers and divide large numbers, with or without decimals.

How can I tell if my 5th grader needs math help?

• Cannot add two-digit and two-digit numbers • Cannot successfully use the multiplication table • They don’t understand the division concept • They become anxious when doing math homework • Performs too poorly in math compared to other subjects • They cannot recognize simple math patterns.

How do I help my 5th grader who is struggling in math?

Use playdoh among others games, to help them understand different math concepts. Please enable them to improve their mental workout by using mental math skills when buying groceries. Use charts, tables, and diagrams to enhance their math understanding. Advice them to read aloud and slowly math word questions to better understand the question. Set small and achievable math goals, and reward every milestone. Get help if you suspect your child has a math learning disability.

Here at Kids on the Yard, we are determined to assess your child and build their strength in writing, math, and English comprehension, among other areas.

Fifth grade is important in every student’s life because they cement all the skills they have learned in the upper grades. It is also a time they get to lay a foundation for further learning. This makes it crucial to practice, grow, and refine their skills.

You can trust our team of experts to build a strong academic foundation for your child.

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How to Get Kids to Do Their Homework and Raise Self-Starters

Homework is one of the best opportunities for kids to practice being self-starters. But how can parents encourage this self-reliance in their kids and avoid fighting over homework?

It had been nearly an hour since my eight-year-old had begun her vocabulary homework. With four pages still to go, she was on the verge of tears and sleepiness as we approached bedtime.

She was overwhelmed and in over her head.

The issue wasn’t an exorbitant amount of homework, but rather that she had left this assignment for the last minute. With a week to complete a unit in her workbook, she hadn’t planned carefully enough, and now was scrambling to get it done the evening before it was due.

This was the first year my oldest had received homework. Wanting to give her a sense of ownership over this responsibility, I had generally let her determine when and how to complete her work .

But as I sat beside her and saw her struggle, I wondered if I had done too little to coach her in time management. Not wanting to become a dreaded helicopter parent, I had probably overcompensated in the opposite direction.

The RIGHT way to get kids to do homework, according to experts

After this experience, I felt a little lost – wondering how much checking in with kids about their homework was too much and how much was too little. Where was the balance?

Searching for answers, I decided to dig into this topic. After identifying three experts in this field, I reached out to them and arranged interviews. Here’s what they told me:

In the early years, actively coach kids on organization and time management

The first thing I learned, not surprisingly, is that my approach to letting my daughter figure out time management on her own was all wrong.

The experts I spoke to pointed out that few young kids have executive functioning skills or the ability to plan ahead when they first begin receiving homework – often in early elementary school. This lack of organizational understanding can be a barrier to getting homework done.

Here’s what they suggest parents do to help their kids develop these skills:

• Set up a specific place for kids to do homework: Betsy Brown Braun , a child development and behavior specialist, believes that kids should have a special place where homework is completed other than the dining room table or kitchen counter. “Kids should have a place of their own – like a desk,” she says. “We want to set them up to respect homework.” This creates a physical place kids associate with doing work, and later with planning for doing work.
• Have a homework routine : Kids benefit from knowing there’s a certain time every day set aside for doing homework, according to Ann Dolin, owner of Educational Connections , a tutoring company in the metropolitan D.C. area. The hour doesn’t have to be the same every day – especially if afterschool activities vary each afternoon. But kids should have a general sense of when homework time takes place. And Braun suggests that parents should involve their children in deciding when this time should be: “Because that shows his responsibility in it,” she says. Knowing there’s a specific time to do homework gets kids in the habit of setting aside time each day to complete their work.
• Ask kids if they need a reminder: Braun suggests asking your child if they want a reminder when the agreed-upon homework time approaches. Ask if they’d like for you to set an alarm or simply tell them when it’s time. By taking ownership of being aware of when it’s time for homework, they’ll start to move towards taking ownership of managing their workload.
• Help kids get started – and then walk away: At this young age, some kids might feel overwhelmed by the idea of simply getting started with their work. Parents can help by making sure their kids understand the directions. But after kids have completed a few problems in an assignment, both Dolin and Braun agree that parents should then walk away and let kids independently complete the work on their own. Completing each assignment independently is, again, a stepping stone towards independently managing the flow of homework assignments.
• Make a rule that homework isn’t considered complete until it’s in your child’s backpack: A good habit to form early on is to make sure homework goes right into kids backpacks as soon as it’s done, Dolin says. This avoids any assignments being turned in late.
• Make sure kids have some downtime: After a long day of school and activities, kids need a bit of downtime before digging into homework. “Most kids need at least a half hour to unwind,” Dolin suggests. This downtime helps kids recharge and increases their ability to focus. Braun also emphasizes that parents need to watch out for overscheduling after-school activities and making sure these don’t supersede homework.

Help kids plan their homework with this weekly homework planner. Click on the link below to access the planner. In addition to receiving the planner, you’ll also be signed up for my weekly-ish newsletter with tips on how to raise independent, self-reliant kids:

Eventually, kids can independently manage homework on their own

Every child is different. But after a year or two of getting help from parents on these intermediary steps towards better time-management, most kids are ready to take on independently the full responsibility of homework management.

But how can parents know if their child is ready? “By asking a lot of questions”, Dolin says.

“How might you organize this? How long are you going to spend on this? Depending on their answers to these questions you can tell if they can be independent,” she says.

Questions about organization and time management also help kids begin problem-solving on their own. And once you’ve seen a consistent pattern of kids having a well-thought-out plan for completing their homework, you can begin to step back and let kids manage their own time.

Ready to teach your child life skills? These cards can help! Each card in this eighty-one deck contains a skill your child can begin practicing with you or on their own. Click here or the image below to learn more.

Ways parents sabotage their kids’ self-reliance with homework

Often without even knowing it, parents get in the way of their kids’ independence with homework and other responsibilities. Here are a few things to avoid in order to raise kids who are homework self-starters:

Don’t focus too heavily on the quality of the work: It’s natural for parents to want their kids to do their best school work. But leave the quality of the work up to the teacher, Dolin says. “I hear of so many fights about the quality of work between parents and students,” she says. “And then kids will start to avoid homework. The goal of homework – especially when kids are younger – is to practice skills and learn independence and responsibility.”

Braun agrees: “I don’t believe that parents should correct their kids’ homework. The quality of the homework is between the child and teacher. How else will the teacher know what the kid needs help on?” She also notes that parents often think they are helping their kids by getting involved in their homework, or not letting them fail. But parents don’t realize the message they’re sending – that their child is not capable or good enough.

Don’t create your own consequences for incomplete homework: Again, let that be between the student and the teacher. If a student doesn’t finish his homework, “he must deal with his teacher,” Dr. Frances Walfish , a family and relationship psychotherapist, says. “Don’t bail him out, criticise, or chastise him,” she continues. Let the teacher decide what the consequence will be and eventually he should begin to realize that it’s easier to get homework done the night before.

If a child declares that she won’t do her homework on a particular evening, parents can state – in a non-threatening way – that they ‘ ll write the child’s teacher and make them aware of her decision, Braun suggests. But she warns that parents still need to be alert to tiredness, an uneasiness about getting started or other reasons why kids might resisting doing their homework – and address those reasons first.

Don’t do homework with your kids :  “Don’t get in the habit of doing homework with your child too much. Parents get in the habit of doing the homework with the child and when it’s time for kids to do their homework on their own they haven’t had the experience of doing it alone,” Braun says. This gets back to the notion of making sure kids understand what they need to accomplish and then walking away to let them work on their own. “A seven or eight-year-old should be able to get his homework done on his own.” she says.

Don’t send the general message that your child isn’t capable: By constantly correcting kids – not letting them try and fail – and doing things for them that they’re capable of doing on their own, we are sending the message to kids that they aren’t capable, Braun says.  But by “working to cultivate self-reliance early on you are putting kids in a position to make them self-starters in everything including homework.”

Coaching while also letting go

After that fateful evening of disappointment and frustration, I changed my tactic in helping my daughter plan her time.

“Let’s sit down and decide when you will have an opportunity to work on your vocabulary homework for this week.” I began to ask her every Monday evening. Play practice was on Thursdays, basketball on Wednesdays. That left Monday and Tuesday as the best evenings for her to work on her assignment.

Writing out the days of the week, we determined on which evening she would have more time to get her work done.

As the weeks progressed, she became more aware of how much time was needed and how long an assignment would take. Sure, there were a few hiccups along the way, but by the end of the year, she was just about ready to tackle homework on her own.

And now that’s she’s in fifth grade, that work has paid off. While every now and then she still discovers she hasn’t allowed enough time to finish a math assignment or didn’t read her book report book quite as quickly as she had hoped, on most weeks her homework is complete – and she gets to bed on time.  

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See related:

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How to Raise Responsible Kids – Not Just Obedient Ones

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1. subscribe to self-sufficient kids’ email list., 2. take one of my quizzes.

Find out if you’re raising a self-sufficient kid ( click here ) or if you’re doing too much for your kids ( click here ). At the end of each quiz, you’ll be asked to provide your email address to see the results.

3. Get your kids started on chores.

Learn how to get your child started on chores (& keep them motivated + avoid power struggles) by enrolling in my Get Your Kids Successfully Started on Chores course. Click here to learn more and sign up.

About Kerry Flatley

Hi! I’m Kerry, the mother of two girls and a certified parent educator. I believe it is possible for parents to have a supportive, loving, and warm relationship with their kids while raising them to be independent and ultimately self-sufficient. Over the years, I’ve read numerous books and articles that support this belief and I’ve put these ideas into practice with my own kids. Read more about me and Self-Sufficient Kids here.

Home / Expert Articles / Child Behavior Problems / School & Homework

“My Child Refuses to Do Homework” — How to Stop the Nightly Struggle Over Schoolwork

By janet lehman, msw.

For many parents, getting their kids to do their homework is a nightly struggle. Some kids refuse to do their homework. Others claim that they don’t have homework, but then the report card comes out, and you realize that their work was not being done.

So why is homework time so difficult? In my opinion, one of the major reasons is that it’s hard for kids to focus at home. Look at it this way: when your child is in school, they’re in a classroom where there aren’t a lot of distractions. The learning is structured and organized, and all the students are focusing on the same thing.

But when your child comes home, their brain clicks over to “free time” mode. In their mind, home is a place to relax, have a snack, listen to music, and play video games. Kids simply don’t view the home as the place to do schoolwork.

If the homework struggles you experience are part of a larger pattern of acting out behavior, then the child is resisting to get power over you. They intend to do what they want to do when they want to do it, and homework just becomes another battlefield. And, as on any other battlefield, parents can use tactics that succeed or tactics that fail.

Regardless of why your child won’t do their homework, know that fighting over it is a losing proposition for both of you. You will end up frustrated, angry, and exhausted, and your child will have found yet another way to push your buttons. And, even worse, they will wind up hating school and hating learning.

A major part of getting your child to do their homework lies in establishing a system so that your child comes to see that homework is just a regular part of home life. Once they accept that, you’ve already won half the battle. Accordingly, my first few tips are around setting up this system. If you get the system right, things tend to fall into place.

Put this system in place with your child at a time when things are calm and going well rather than during the heat of an argument. Tell your child that you’re going to try something different starting next week with homework that will make it go better for everyone. Then explain the system.

You’ll find that this system will make your life easier as a parent, will make you more effective as a parent, and will help your child to get the work done. And when your child gets their work done, they’re more likely to succeed, and nothing drives motivation more than success.

Structure the Evening for Homework

When your kids come home, there should be a structure and a schedule set up each night. I recommend that you write this up and post it on the refrigerator or in some central location in the house. Kids need to know that there is a time to eat, a time to do homework, and also that there is free time. And remember, free time starts after homework is done.

Homework time should be a quiet time in your whole house. Siblings shouldn’t be in the next room watching TV or playing video games. The whole idea is to eliminate distractions. The message to your child is, “You’re not going to do anything anyway, so you might as well do your homework.”

Even if your child doesn’t have homework some nights, homework time should still mean no phone and no electronics. Instead, your child can read a book or a magazine in their room or work on longer-term assignments. Consistently adhering to the homework time structure is important to instill the homework habit.

Start the Evening Homework Habit When Your Kids are Young

If your children are younger and they don’t get homework yet, set aside quiet time each evening where your child can read or do some type of learning. Doing so will help children understand that evening quiet and study time is a part of everyday home life, just like chores. This habit will pay off when the real homework begins.

Use a Public Place for Homework

For a lot of kids, sending them to their rooms to do their homework is a mistake. Many children need your presence to stay focused and disciplined. And they need to be away from the stuff in their rooms that can distract them.

You know your child best. If you think they’re not being productive in their room, then insist they work at the kitchen table or in some other room where you can monitor them and where there will be fewer distractions.

If they do homework in their room, the door to the room should be open, and you should check in from time to time. No text messaging, no fooling around. Take the phone and laptop away and eliminate electronics from the room during study time. In short, you want to get rid of all the temptations and distractions.

Give Breaks During Homework Time

Many kids get tired halfway through homework time, and that’s when they start acting up. If your child is doing an hour of homework, have them take a 5-minute break every half-hour so that they can get up, have a snack, and stretch their legs. But don’t allow electronics during the break—electronics are just too distracting.

Monitor the break and ensure that your child gets back to work promptly.

Be sure to encourage your child when they’re discouraged. It’s okay to say things like:

“I know it’s a drag, but think of this—when you get your work done, the rest of the night is yours.”

“Look, if you do your work all week, you’ll have the whole weekend to do what you want.”

Show your child empathy—how many of us truly enjoyed homework every night? It’s work, pure and simple. But your child will be encouraged when they begin to have success with their work.

Help Your Child Get Started With Their Homework

Some kids have a hard time getting assignments started. They may be overwhelmed or unsure where to begin. Or the work may seem too difficult.

There’s a concept I explain in The Total Transformation® child behavior program called hurdle help . If you have a child who has a hard time getting started, spend the first five minutes with them to get them over the first couple of hurdles. Perhaps help them with the first math problem or make sure they understand the assignment.

For many kids who are slow starters, hurdle help is very effective. This doesn’t mean you are doing their homework for them—this is simply extra help designed to get them going on their own.

Help Your Child Manage Long-Term Assignments

If your child has a big, long-term project, then you want to work with them to estimate how much time it’s going to take. Then your child has to work within that time frame. So if your child has a science project, help them manage and structure their time. For instance, if the project is due in 30 days, ask them:

“How much time are you going to spend on it each night?”

They might say, “15 minutes a night,” and you hold them to that.

Don’t assume that your child knows how to manage their time effectively. As adults, we sometimes take for granted the habits we have spent a lifetime developing and forget that our kids are not there yet.

Make Sunday Night a School Night

The way that I structure the weekend is that Sunday night is a school night, not Friday. So if your child has homework for the weekend, and as long as they’re done all their work for the past week, they get Friday and Saturday night off and can do their homework on Sunday night.

If there’s a project or something big to do over the weekend, then work with your child to budget their time. They may have to put some time in on Saturday or Sunday during the day. But other than that, your child should have the weekend off too, just like adults do.

The Weekend Doesn’t Begin Until Overdue Work Is Done

If your child has overdue homework, their weekend shouldn’t begin until those assignments are done. In other words, Friday night is a homework night if their week’s work is not complete.

Believe me, this is a highly effective consequence for kids because it creates a great incentive to get their work done. Indeed, each minute they’re doing homework is a minute they could be hanging out with friends or playing video games.

If you can hold to this rule once and deal with the complaining, then next week the homework will be done.

By the way, if they say they can’t do their homework because they didn’t bring their school books home, they should be grounded for the weekend. You can say:

“I don’t want to hear that you can’t do it because you don’t have your books. You’d better call around and find a friend who you can borrow them from. Otherwise, you’ll be staying in this weekend.”

Make Homework a Higher Priority Than Activities

Kids are involved in a lot of after school activities these days. I understand that. But my priority has always been “homework comes first.”

In my opinion, if the homework isn’t done on Monday, then your child shouldn’t go to football on Tuesday. It’s fine if he misses a practice or two. You can say:

“Here’s the deal. We’re not going to football today. You need to get your work done first.”

If your child says, “Well, if I miss a practice, I’m going to get thrown off the team,” You can say:

“Well, then make sure your work is complete. Otherwise, you’re not going to practice. That’s all there is to it.”

I personally don’t put football, soccer, or any other extracurricular activities above homework and home responsibilities. I don’t believe parents should be going from soccer to karate to basketball with their kids while homework and school responsibilities are being neglected.

Use Rewards for Schoolwork, Not Bribes

Most kids get personal satisfaction out of getting good grades and completing their work, and that’s what we’re aiming for. Nevertheless, it’s important to reinforce positive behavior, and that may mean offering an incentive for getting good grades. For instance, my son knew that he would get a certain reward for his performance if he got all B’s or above. The reward was an incentive to do well.

One of the shortcuts we take as parents is to bribe our kids rather than rewarding them for performance. It can be a subtle difference. A reward is something that is given after an achievement. A bribe is something you give your child after negotiating with them over something that is already a responsibility.

If you bribe your child to do their homework or to do anything else that is an expected responsibility, then your child will come to expect something extra just for behaving appropriately. Bribes undermine your parental authority as kids learn that they can get things from you by threatening bad behavior. Bribes put your child in charge of you.

The appropriate parental response to not meeting a responsibility is a consequence, not a bribe. A bribe says, “If you do your homework, I will extend your curfew by an hour.” In contrast, a consequence says, “If you don’t do your homework, you’re grounded until it’s finished.” Never bribe your kids to do what they’re expected to do.

Use Effective Consequences

When giving consequences, be sure they’re effective consequences. What makes an effective consequence? An effective consequence motivates your child to good behavior. They put you back in control and teach your child how to problem-solve, giving your child the skills needed to be successful.

An effective consequence looks like this:

“If you fall below a B average, then you can no longer study in your room and must study at the kitchen table until you get your average back to a B.”

For the child who prefers to study in their room, this is an effective consequence.

Another effective consequence would be the following:

“If you choose not to study during the scheduled time, you will lose your electronics for the night. Tomorrow, you’ll get another chance to use them.”

And the next day, your child gets to try again to earn the privilege of electronics. Short-term consequences like this are very effective. Just don’t take away this privilege for more than a day as your child will have no incentive to do better the next time.

For more on consequences, read the article on how to give effective consequences to your child .

Be Prepared to Let Your Child Fail

Failure should be an option, and sometimes you just have to let your child fail . Parents often do their kids a disservice when they shield them from the consequences of their actions. If your child chooses not to study enough and they get a failing grade, that’s the natural consequence for their behavior. And they should experience the discomfort that results from their behavior.

Let me be clear. If you interfere and try to get your child’s teacher to change their grade, your child will learn the wrong lesson. Your child will learn that if they screw up enough, Mom and Dad will take care of them. And they don’t learn their math or science or whatever it is they failed.

To be sure, failing is a hard lesson, but it’s the right lesson when your child fails. And it’s not the end of the world. In fact, for many kids, it’s what turns them around.

Don’t Fight with Your Child Over Homework

Don’t get sucked into arguments with your child about homework. Make it very clear that if they don’t do their homework, then the next part of their night does not begin. Keep discussions simple. Say to your child:

“Right now is homework time. The sooner you get it done, the sooner you can have free time.”

Say this in a supportive way with a smile on your face. Again, it’s important not to get sucked into fights with your child. Remember, you don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to. If your child refuses to do his or her work, then calmly give the consequence that you established for not doing homework.

Also, trying to convince your child that grades are important is a losing battle. You can’t make your child take school as seriously as you do. The truth is, they don’t typically think that way. To get your child to do homework, focus on their behavior, not their motivation. Rather than giving a lecture, just maintain the system that enables them to get their work done. Often, the motivation comes after the child has had a taste of success, and this system sets them up for that success.

Stay Calm When Helping Your Child With Their Homework

It’s important to be calm when helping your child with their homework. Don’t argue about the right answer for the math problem or the right way to do the geography quiz. If you get frustrated and start yelling and screaming at your child, this sets a negative tone and won’t help them get the work done. It’s better to walk away than it is to engage in an argument, even when you’re just trying to be helpful.

For couples, it may be that one of you is more patient and acceptable to your child. Let that person take on the homework monitoring responsibilities. And don’t take it personally if it isn’t you.

Remember, if you can’t stay calm when helping your child, or if you find that your help is making the situation worse, then it’s better not to help at all. Find someone else or talk to the teacher about how your child can get the help they need. And try not to blame your child for the frustration that you feel.

It’s Your Child’s Homework, Not Yours

Remember that your child is doing the homework as a school assignment. The teacher will ultimately be the judge of how good or bad, correct or incorrect the work is. You’re not responsible for the work itself; your job is to guide your child. You can always make suggestions, but ultimately it’s your child’s job to do their assignments. And it’s the teacher’s job to grade them.

Know the Teachers and the Assignments

Build good relationships with your child’s teachers. Meet with the teachers at the beginning of the school year and stay in touch as the year progresses. Your relationships with your child’s teachers will pay off if your child begins to have problems.

And if your child does have problems, then communicate with their teachers weekly. If they’re not handing in their work on time, ask the teachers to send you any assignments that they didn’t get done each week. Many schools have assignments available online, which is a big help for parents. Just don’t rely on your child to give you accurate information. Find out for yourself.

The bottom line is that you want to hold your child accountable for doing their work, and you can only do that if you know what the work is. If you keep yourself informed, then you won’t be surprised when report cards come out.

Work with your child on a system to keep track of assignments. I recommend an old-fashioned paper calendar simply because we already have too many distracting electronics in our lives—experiment and use what works best for your child.

Finally, try to see your child’s teachers as your allies. In my experience, most teachers are dedicated and caring, but I realize that this isn’t always the case. So, for your child’s sake, do your best to find a way to work with their teachers.

If You Think Your Child Might Have a Learning Disability

Kids are expected to do some difficult work, and your child may struggle. If your child is having an especially hard time, talk with their teacher. Ask if it’s typical for your child to be struggling in this area.

In some cases, the teacher may recommend testing to see if your child has a learning disability. While this can be hard to hear as a parent, it’s important to find out so that you can make the necessary adjustments.

If it turns out that your child does have a learning disability, then you want to get an Individualized Educational Plan (IEP) set up with the school.

Most kids don’t enjoy homework, and for some, it will always be a struggle. Our children all have different strengths and abilities, and while some may never be excellent students, they might be great workers, talented artists, or thoughtful builders.

I have to admit that dealing with my son’s homework was one of my least favorite experiences as a parent. It was overwhelming at times. Often, I just wasn’t equipped to offer the help he needed.

Our son struggled with a learning disability, which made the work feel unending at times. My husband James was much better at helping him, so he took on this responsibility. But even with this division of labor, we had to make adjustments to our schedules, our lives, and our expectations to make sure our son did his homework as expected.

Life would be easier if all children were self-motivated students who came home, sat down, and dug into their homework without being asked. This is hardly the case, though. Therefore, you need to set up a system that is right for your child, and it’s going to be easier for some kids than for others.

We’re trying to raise our kids to be responsible and accountable for their homework. And we’re trying to avoid fighting with them over it every night. When I had parents in my office, I would take these concepts and show them how they could make it work for their families in their own homes. The families I worked with were able to turn the nightly homework struggle around successfully time and time again.

Related content: The Homework Battle: How to Get Children to Do Homework

Empowering Parents Podcast: Apple, Spotify

About Janet Lehman, MSW

Janet Lehman, MSW, has worked with troubled children and teens for over 30 years. A veteran social worker, she specializes in child behavior issues — ranging from anger management and oppositional defiance to more serious criminal behavior in teens. She is co-creator of The Total Transformation® Program , The Complete Guide To Consequences™ , Getting Through To Your Child™ , and Two Parents One Plan™ .

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Hello, my grandson recently moved with me from another state. He is currently in 8th grade (but should be in 9th). He basically failed the last 2 years and was promoted. I would say he is at a 6th grade level. It's a daily fight with him to do his homework. He won't even try. I know a lot of this is because no one has ever made him do his homework before. I thought he would just have to get in a routine of doing it. He's been in school for a month now and its a fight every single day after school. I have lost all the patience I had. I am tired of being a broken record and being the "bad guy". I don't want to give up on him and send him back to his mom, where I know he will never graduate. I have made so many sacrifices to get him here, but I am literally at my wits end with this. I knew it wasn't going to be easy but I didn't think it was going to be this hard.

My rule is homework after school. If he comes home and does his homework after school, it was easier for him to complete. That lasted a week and a half. Now, he just sits there and does nothing. Does anyone have any suggestions? I couldn't live with myself if I sent him back and he became nothing but a drop out. I know I am not one to have patience, and I am trying but at the same time, I am almost over it. I don't like going to bed crying and knowing that he is crying too. I am open to all suggestions. Please and thank you.

I'm so sorry you are facing these struggles with your grandson. We here from many caregivers in similar situations, so you're not alone in your frustration. We have several articles that offer helpful tips for managing these homework struggles, which can be found here: https://www.empoweringparents.com/article-categories/child-behavior-problems/school-homework/

We appreciate you reaching out and wish you all the best moving forward. Be sure to check back and let us know how things are going.

Jessicar Thank you for this article and strategies. I echo many of the frustrations expressed by other parents here, including my opinion (as an educator) that homework should not exist. I agree that teachers and parents are in a struggle about which adult is responsible for supporting the child in getting More homework done. The best thing for my son was a free "homework club" in fourth and fifth grade where a teacher monitored completion of homework. He has nothing like this in middle school so far. Where I really disagree with the article is about extracurricular activities. Kids need physical activity through sports! They need enrichment beyond academics through the arts, theater, music. Many families send their children to religious, language, and/or cultural programs after school. If I sat in school all day, I'd want to move my body and interact with others too. The solution is not removing extracurricular activities that are healthy or motivating or valued. The solution is for schools to limit homework. Given that there is still homework as a reality--I'd like advice on when to have child do homework AFTER sports or extracurricular activity. When is the best time for homework if the goal is to go to bed on time (in my house in bed around 9 pm)? Between extracurricular and dinner--when the kid is tired? After dinner? My child is in 7th grade and I still can't figure it out. What do others do/think?

I found school to be extremely boring, as a teen. Looking back I realize that I hadn't found the work challenging enough. Personally, I struggled with this all through high school. I was completely disinterested in school, as a result.

I noticed that there wasn't a section addressing situations where children, who are motivated by challenges, do poorly as a result of boredom.

I enjoy reading many of the articles; even those which don't necessarily apply to my current situations with my child. One never knows what obstacles or challenges one may come across. Thank you

Here's what I know. Correcting our children when their behavior is displeasing is what most parents focus on. Without a lot of explanation I'm going to try to get you to change your focus. All children have 4 emotional needs:

1. A sense of belonging

2. A sense of personal power

3. To be heard and understood

4. Limits and boundaries

Rather than focus on your child's behavior, focus on meeting these needs. Meet the needs, change the behavior. There a 25 ways to meet these needs. One of the most effective is to spend regular one-on-one time with your child doing what your child wants to do. How do you spell love? T-I-M-E. It seems counter-intuitive, but just try it for a week. Do this for 1/2 hour every day for a week. See what happens.

Frustrated Confused Parent, I went through similar challenges with my son when he was in high school. As a grade school student his grades were always B and higher. The changes began when his mother and I separated; my son was 12yo. Prior to our separation I was the one who maintained, and enforced the habit of completing his assignments before extracurricular activities could be enjoyed. His mother never felt she had the patience or intelligence to assist him with his homework assignments and upon our separation she completely ignored his school work. Although he continued to follow the structure I had established through grade school, he soon began to realize that no one was showing interest any longer and, thus, began shirking school related responsibilities. My son and I were, and still are, close. I am certain that the separation likely had some affect on him, but it was more than that. He was reaching his teens and becoming more self-aware. Friends began to play a more integral and influential part in his life. Unfortunately my son's grades began slipping as he reached his early teens. For me, this was extremely frustrating since I was aware of how intelligent he was and of what he was capable. After many aggravating, lengthy, heated, and unyielding conversations with his mother about maintaining the structure established through grade school, it became clear she was incapable or simply unwilling. Essentially, he was on his own. Of course I would do whatever I could to help. For starters, I facilitated a transfer to a Charter School, realizing that he needed more individualized attention than that which a public school could provide. It seemed as though he was getting 'lost in the shuffle'.

Unfortunately the damage had already been done. After two years under his mother's lack of tutelage my son had developed some poor habits.

He struggled with maintaining good grades throughout his high school career. By 'maintaining good grades' I mean that he would take a grading of 45 in math and bring it to a 70 within three weeks of the end of a marking period. He ALWAYS passed, though. He would somehow get his grades to or even above passing by the end of the period. As I began to see this, I began to have more faith knowing that when the going got tough he would step up and take charge. It also indicated that he did well with what might perceive as an impossible goal. So, I started to have faith that he'd find his way.

He has since graduated, he has a good-paying job, and he is beginning school to become an electrician within the next month or so. In two weeks he moves into his own apartment, also. He's never done drugs, never drank alcohol, and never started smoking cigarettes. All of which I have done as a teen and well into my adult years. I am in recovery. My son is aware of my own struggles. Most importantly, I believe, is that he has a complete understanding that we all struggle in our own ways. Working through the difficulties, challenges, and obstacles are what makes us stronger and it's our compassion for others, and ourselves, which help us grow into decent adults.

I came to realize that the 'grades' he received in school had nothing to do with the amazing adult he's become; it was literally everything else.

NanaRound2 My 6 year old grandson has just taken 2 hours to write a list and write 3 sentences. He thinks if the words were shorter it wouldn't take so long. Already went through this with his dad. I celebrated more than he did when he graduated. Can't drag More another kid through school. Losing my mind and like the previous comment have tried EVERYTHING.

Yeah -been there, done that. Doesn't work. At least not for my child. I've read every *actual* parenting book out there ( You know, the books publishes by Harvard & Stanford professors who've been studying parenting and child psychology for the past 30 years?) ... and you're all missing something - because I've tried it all.

My kid DGAF. This was almost painful to read. "oh, yup - tried that one. That one too. Oh, hey - I've tried that as well."

This is so frustrating; tell me something I haven't already tried 50 times.

Psych Fan I'm with you my sophomore son DGAF . I tried so much stuff even set time stuff and he just doesn't go get his work out. He's 5'9 so I am 5'1 and I can't move him to do stuff . All he does is debate with me that More Grades really don't matter that he's like I'm just going to get D's because I'm not going to care to do better because I do not like school. He doesn't understand why I don't approve of D grades because I know he has better potential but he's like D grades I will pass and get my diploma .

The first thing on the list is to try and stay calm. While doing homework with my children I'm usually very calm. When I do get frustrated I'll leave the room for a moment, wash my face, and take a few deep breaths until I calm down. Or I'll make hot chocolate to help calm my nerves. It's not a perfect system, but what is?

Number two is to set clear expectations around homework time and responsibilities. We have a standard homework time at our house, with a timer and everything. If our kids meet the homework time goal they'll be rewarded later in the evening with family time. Each of our kids know their roles and responsibilities in the house whether the work gets done before dinner or not.

Number three is a relationship with the teachers, each of whom e-mail us, some two or three times a day. Contact with them has never been better. They're teachers are all pretty awesome too.

Number Four, play the parental role most useful to your child...I have three kids. One needs no help at all, one needs minor help and advisement, while the third requires constant supervision or their e-mail might 'accidentally' open up. This we've provided through double teaming. One parent works with them until the other gets home, then they switch while the other goes to make dinner.

Five, keep activities similar with all your kids. We all live on the same schedule, if one of them finishes homework early they get the reward of extra quiet reading time-my kids are ALL book worms.

Six, Set up a structured time and place for homework. Done. Homework table with a supplies basket right in the middle of the room. Big enough for all of them to work at and then some, it's an octagonal table which my husband built. I also always have their 'homework snacks' waiting for them when they get home, and I usually try to make it healthy-even if they don't realize it.

Seven, start early. My kids have been doing 'homework' with me since they were babies, and (as I pointed out to them yesterday) they loved it. We'd learn about cooking, dinosaurs, amphibians, insects, math, English, chemistry, even the periodic table came up. We'd do work pages every day and they'd love it.

Eight, hurdle help, works in area's like math, but not so much with history or English when the problems aren't as straight forward. But we do use this method where it applies.

Nine, choose the best person for the job. I'm best at English and my husband at math. When I get stuck on math I know who to go to, and I'll even study in my spare time to get better at it so I can be more useful in case he has to work late. That being said, we both devote a lot of our time to helping our kids with their homework.

Ten, show empathy and support. Done, not only can I relate to my kids, but I've pointed out that not getting their work done will make them feel bad bad enough, and that that's why we should work on getting it done together, so they have something to be proud of.

Use positive reinforcement and incentives. :) There was this one time I sat my son down at a table with a work book about 400 pages long. He was young, not even in school yet. Next to the book I placed a giant bag of M&Ms. I told him for every page he got done, he could have one m&m. About ten minutes later he finished the workbook and grinned up at me. When I found out he'd finished the book, I quickly checked it to see if it was done well, and then pushed the bag of M&M's towards him and told him he could just have it...Now they get rewarded in video games and computer time...

It seems that according to this article I'm doing everything right...So why is my child still struggling with homework/classwork? They've literally just refused to do it. Have seriously just sat in their chair without saying a word and stared at the table, or desk, or screen- as the majority of work is now done on computers...I'll sit with them, ask them if they need help, try to help them with problems. They will tell me the right answer to the questions being asked and then refuse to write it down. I feel like I've done everything I can as a parent to help them, but despite all my efforts, it isn't working. So...when all of these things fail, when a parent has done everything right, and there is nothing more they can do short of taking the pen or pencil into their own hands and doing it themselves, (but that would be cheating their child out of an education) what then should the parents do?

When our kids don't get their homework done before dinner, they're sent down the hall where it's quiet so they can finish it at the desk there, while the other kids have family time. They are told to come and get us if they really need help after that. But at this point it's like ostracizing our child for not doing homework.

I agree with most of what's on this page, and our family lifestyle reflects that, but I will disagree with one thing it said. It is our job to help our kids and be supportive of them yes, to nurture them and help them get the skills they need to take care of themselves and their home when they're older...but it is not our job to do the teachers work for them, they get paid for that. Some days it seems like that's what's expected of parents. Some even send home classwork if the kids don't finish it in class. Which means the child now has even more work to do on top of their homework. Though I understand that the teachers want the child to finish the lesson, and were the homework not a factor I probably wouldn't mind it as much. I don't even mind them sending home study guides to help kids before tests (Which is what homework was originally) but to send home overwhelming piles of work each night for parents to help kids with, (Each child with different homework so that parents need to bounce from history, to math to English) it's unreasonable. When teachers send home homework, they're dictating what the parents can do with the little time they have with their child. Which is wrong. We once had to cancel a trip to a science museum because our child had too much homework to finish and there was no way to make it in time and get their homework done. They could have had an amazing educational experience which would overall help them get excited about learning with new and fun tactile experiences, but their schedule (and therefore our schedule) was being dictated by the teacher while they weren't even in class. Of course I try not to talk bad about homework in front of my children, because that would make it even more difficult to get them to do it. But children NEED family time, they NEED to be kids. To be allowed to get away from their work and be themselves, to go outside and play with their friends, or even go out to dinner once in a while with their parents. Homework has made it difficult to grow a relationship with our children beyond the confines of what the teachers are dictating. It's violating in some ways and frustrating in others. It's grown into this monstrous thing which it was never meant to become, and the funny part about it is that most studies done on it show that schools who don't have homework have higher test scores and graduation rates. Not to mention better mental health rates. Studies also show, that after a child is taught something, they'll only really learn it after a good nights sleep, and that no amount of homework will change that. Sleep is what our bodies need to absorb important information we learn throughout the day, so staying up late with homework might even be harmful to a child's education...

Sorry I guess that turned into a bit of a rant...In the end I was hoping to find something useful in this article, something I hadn't tried that might work, but I've done it all, and will probably continue to do all of it in hopes that consistency might be the key...It's just that even after years of already doing All of this consistently, it's still not working. It's as if my child has made a conscious decision Not to work. He's not unintelligent, he understands it, he's even been tested and found to have an above average ability to learn. He just not doing it..So what now? What more can I do to actually inspire him to do the work?

AshumSmashum Out of all of this, most of which I've read and tried a billion times, your comment hit deeper. My son scores in the 99% on tests but cannot sit down and do the simplest homework. He does have autism and adhd so when he freezes up on homework, despite More knowing it, I'm lost at how to help him get it done. He knows the work so why does he need to show it with 20 math problems after school that take forever to complete one? (whatever honors algebra stuff he's in, I was lucky to learn division lol) He has a high IQ and excels in all subjects and yet is being tutored, so far, in English just to get the work done. I'm so done with the emotional toll it takes on me and him at home. Nobody wants to go to work for 8 hours and come home and do the same for another 5 so why do we think our kids want to come home and do more classwork? I'm so appreciative of your comment!

JC Hi Barb, thank you for bringing this up! My son sounds a lot like you...and he really wants to get good grades and go to an Ivy League school. What could someone do to help an 8th grader in the moment of struggle, while making sure they don't get more More anxious from falling behind for the rest of the year?

Tb Hi Barb, I'm the parent of an 8th grader and I want to thank you for the comment you left here. You helped me look at the deeper issues and I really appreciate that. I'm going to approach the conversation with my son differently, thanks to you. Thank More you!

My 11 year old daughter, Alice, has always helped her 7 year old sister, Chole, with homework. But just recently Alice has been giving Chole the wrong answers. We have been trying to get her to give Chole the correct answers

but she always yells at us. She has a baby sister 2 months named Ray and ever since Ray was born she has been giving Chole wrong answers. I once overheard her and Kevin, my husband, talking about how she felt left out. She came and talked to me and said exactly what she had told Kevin. She also told me she has been getting bad grades and doesn't get her homework. Me and Alice talked and she said "All the cool New York girls get straight A's and ever since I started getting D's and F's they said I wasn't cool anymore." We started having her grandparents come over and she would yell, hit, scream, and talk back to them. She is a great student but she spends all of her time on her phone. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even at school she is on her phone. All I'm asking is that 1. How do I make her stop screaming, yelling, hitting, and back talking? 2. How do I make her feel cool and get A's again?and 3. How do I get her off her phone?

sounds like you have a number of concerns around your daughter’s behavior, and

it certainly can feel overwhelming. We would suggest https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/its-never-too-late-7-ways-to-start-parenting-more-effectively/ and focusing on just one or two of the most serious, to get

started. Behaviors like verbal or physical abuse would be of top priority,

while behaviors like https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/how-to-walk-away-from-a-fight-with-your-child-why-its-harder-than-you-think/ we would recommend ignoring, and not giving it any power or control.

Empowering Parents author Sara Bean offers some great insight into the reason

for poor child behavior in her article, https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/the-surprising-reason-for-bad-child-behavior-i-cant-solve-problems/.It sounds like your daughter is struggling to

find more effective ways to solve the problems she is facing, and the result is

the acting out behavior. Keep in mind, you can’t make your daughter do anything, but what you can do is help her to

learn better tools to solve whatever problems may come her way. Best of luck to

you and your family as you continue to work on this.

Emma Reed Alice also swears at school and she swears to teachers. Please we have tried everything, even her sister at age 18. What have we done wrong?

Being away from loved ones when they are struggling can be

distressing. It may help to know that it’s not unusual to see changes in

behavior as kids move from the tweens into adolescence, as Janet Lehman

explains in the article https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/adolescent-behavior-changes-is-your-child-embarrassed-by-you/. Normally responsible

kids can start to push back against meeting expectations and disrespect towards

parents and other authority figures can become quite common. The behavior you

describe isn’t OK; it is normal though. I can hear how much you want to help

your daughter and granddaughter

work through these challenges. If your daughter is open to it, you could share

some Empowering Parents articles with her, such as the one above and this one, https://www.empoweringparents.com/article/my-childs-behavior-is-so-bad-where-do-i-begin-how-to-coach-your-child-forward/.

We appreciate you writing in. Best of luck to you and your family moving

forward. Take care.

mphyvr Thanks for all these "strategies", they might work for some parents, but quite simplistic and just plain old common sense for more defiant kids... Thanks anyways and hope this article helps many.

Psych Fan I'm a mom of a sophomore he's also a swearing boy and will have quite a tantrum even with consequences of take away all he does is sleep. He doesn't like school says school is a waste of time and that grades won't matter in his adulthood . He says More it over n over about how schooling won't help him in the future as I go it will help you do good on a ACT and SAT he is like getting good scores on those are only good if your going to college. He also is like jobs won't look at my grades . I tell him homework teaches him responsibility once a job sees your amount of effort in school your going to have a heck of time getting hired. I even ask him how is he going to succeed to work real well at a job when he doesn't work hard at school he goes I don't need to work hard at school but I will need to work hard at a job.

dcastillo68 If it was only this simple, but, in reality it is not.  Middle school syndrome is the worst.  Kids don't want to be labeled as nerds so they do everything to try to fail.  I went through that with my first born, and now again with my youngest.  It is More very frustrating when I was the total opposite when I was growing up.  I cared about my grades an I took it for granted thinking they will feel the same way.  Now seeing how they are happy with just getting by is really frustrating to me because I am such an over achiever.  They didn't even get an ounce of this.  Very very frustrating.  And I wish I have never invited video games to this household.  That is all they want to do.  I keep using this an incentive to bring them back on track, but as soon as I give them their games back, they are back to their old habits.  Sorry, but I can't wait until they are finished with school and hopefully moving out of state to hopefully a college career.  I may change my mind later, but at the moment, this is just how I feel.  It is very hard too when you don't get any help.  I find today's teacher to be lazy and pushing on more responsibility to the parents.  Who has time to do a full day's of work, only to do additional work at home?  okay, enough venting.

@frustrated single dad Diane Lewis Hi there - I have a son adopted out of foster care.  He is 6 1/2 and has been in 5 homes.  He is totally the same!  They learn this behavior and are incredibly manipulative.  They are so insanely smart.  I worry about exactly the same thing.  They turn on and off the behavior depending on who they are with and what they want.

We did Parent Child Interactive Therapy (PCIT) at the Mailman Center (Jackson Hospital Miami).  It made a huge difference in the short-term.  They basically taught us to be full-time behavioral therapists with my son.  The effects wore off after a few months as my son adapted and found ways to circumvent the consequences techniques taught to us.  He is like the Borg!  I am going back to get more ideas on how to adapt and change and stay one step ahead of my son.  The gals there are really smart!

So, that being said - we have to be Jean Luc Picard and constantly change and adapt and outsmart them - just like changing the phasers on a laser gun!  It is bloody hard work.  And, harder the older they get -

eg.  He drops like a dead weight - throws his book bag and will not get in the car to go to school - response - next morning I headed it off by calling out to the kids "LAST ONE IN THE CAR IS A ROTTEN EGG!"  This has worked for 2 days now.  

Wont do homework 2 nights ago - response - "ooh I like doing word puzzles - Im going to do them and win" - this worked one night but not the next - he just then just left me to do his work - so I have told his teacher that there will be no school party for Alex next week unless he gets his homework finished - we will see if this works.....

It is totally exhausting and you have to be on your A game all the time.  Im telling you this but - I have to tell myself this too.  We have to stay really fit (like cross fit) and work out like a marine.  We have to be very disciplined with ourselves - a healthy body is a healthy mind - we cannot let up at all.  We have to stay calm at all times (again self discipline).  

Im always looking for concrete reactions to situations with my son.  Like I said - the entire day goes on like this with everything except what he wants to do.  Wont get dressed in the morning - put out his clothes in dining room where there are no distractions or toys - tell him that if he gets dressed and ready for school quickly - he can spend the left over time on the trampoline.  That worked this morning.

STAY STRONG MY BROTHER IN ARMS!!!  If you can get into a PCIT program - do it.

Love to you - R

My child comes home and says he doesn't have homework, does something easy to make it look like he's doing his homework, or says he did it during free time in class.  How do you combat this without going to the school everyday?  Neither my husband nor I can do More this because of work, and the we asked the teacher's if it was possible to send us the assignments via email or let us come pick them up once a week with no cooperation.  He is a very smart kid and gets "A's' on the work he does, but he is failing all of his core classes because he won't do homework.

@atmywitsend  , my child is the same way.  I'm at my wits end.  I feel like I'm a failure as a parent because I thought I taught my smart kid to succeed - and instead she's lying to me.

Psych Fan NinaMays I'm with the same feelings as my son can be above a C student but he choose to go oh I rather just get F's on this work than to actually get at least a B or A on these many assignments.. I ask him why he chooses F's More in many assignments when he could get a grade to bring his grades up and me telling me he's not being his full potential as by making him not do his work how can I truly believe he's going to be successful and he's like I have big brains . Then I'm like why not show me by doing your school work he goes I don't need do that and I show you of my big brains by telling you school isn't important. Telling me I am brainwashed. He is a sophomore in high school.

FRUSTRATED PARENT NinaMays This is my reality too - "relationship" with teachers is difficult when they won't co-operate with homework expectations, or follow up email - the schools complain that kids are on the internet - yet its them providing wifi passwords - so kids are playing in class - lying about More homework - and since I'm not in the class, I have no idea until report cards surface.

Responses to questions posted on EmpoweringParents.com are not intended to replace qualified medical or mental health assessments. We cannot diagnose disorders or offer recommendations on which treatment plan is best for your family. Please seek the support of local resources as needed. If you need immediate assistance, or if you and your family are in crisis, please contact a qualified mental health provider in your area, or contact your statewide crisis hotline.

We value your opinions and encourage you to add your comments to this discussion. We ask that you refrain from discussing topics of a political or religious nature. Unfortunately, it's not possible for us to respond to every question posted on our website.

• 1. The Homework Battle: How to Get Children to Do Homework
• 2. What to Do When Your Child or Teen is Suspended or Expelled From School
• 3. Acting Out in School: When Your Child is the Class Troublemaker
• 4. Young Kids in School: Help for the Top 4 Behavior Problems
• 5. When Your Child Has Problems at School: 6 Tips for Parents
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How to Make a Better Homework Schedule for Your Family

Verywell / Zackary Angeline

Why Homework Schedules Are Effective

• Developing a Schedule

Other Considerations

Do you frequently have homework struggles with your child or teen? Or, does your student procrastinate doing their work? Maybe they even fail to turn in assignments. If any of these scenarios resonate with you, a better homework schedule may help.

A regular homework schedule establishes predictable times when homework is to be completed. Once the homework schedule has been in place for a few weeks, you may even find your child will begin doing their homework without needing to be reminded—although you may still need to monitor their work progress.

If you're struggling with homework completion in your household, or if you're having daily battles about allotting the appropriate amount of time to homework, you're not alone. That's why educators recommend developing a homework schedule—with input from your kids.

Once you set a homework schedule, then there are no questions about when the work will be done. It also communicates clear expectations; having a homework schedule helps kids understand what is required of them. And following the schedule encourages them to develop a good work ethic.

Schedules also help prevent procrastination and instill good habits like completing work on time. Homework routines also improve study skills and encourage kids to plan ahead.

Other benefits include developing your child's work ethic and organizational abilities. By helping your child complete their work at regular intervals, you are modeling how to manage time and projects in the future. When you send them off to college , they will know how to pace their work so they can avoid all-nighters at the end of the semester.

How to Develop a Homework Schedule

To develop a homework schedule, start by talking with your kids. Get their input on how they would like to manage their time and incorporate their homework into their daily routine. A successful homework schedule allows kids to finish their work and also have some free time.

Give Kids an Option

If you ask kids when they want to do their homework, their first answer might be "Never" or "Later." But if you dig a little deeper, your child may tell you what matters to them as they plan their schedule. This information will help you avoid scheduling homework during their favorite television program or when they usually get online to play games with friends.

When you include your child in the decision-making process, you also will get more buy-in from them because they know that their concerns were heard. You don't have to give them their way, but at least considering what they have to say will let them feel included. After all, this homework schedule is about them completing their homework.

Allow for Free Time

Some kids can step through the front door and buckle down on their homework right away. When this happens, they reap the reward of getting their work done early and having the rest of the evening to do what they want. But most kids need to eat and decompress a bit before tackling their assignments.

As you develop your homework schedule, keep in mind your child has already spent at least six hours in class. And this time doesn't include getting to and from school or participation in extracurricular programs . Allow kids some free time before beginning their homework if that's what they need to unwind.

Establish a Timeline

Generally, you can expect about 10 minutes of homework per grade level of school. This means that a third-grade student will need about 30 minutes to complete homework. However, the amount of time needed can vary dramatically between students, teachers, and schools.

Find out how much time your child's teacher expects homework to take each evening. If your child takes a lot of time to complete their work or struggles with homework , talk with the teacher. Your child may need extra instruction on a task or tutoring assistance—or fewer homework assignments.

Pick a Homework Spot

Designate a comfortable and efficient spot for your kids to do their homework. This workspace should be well-lit, stocked with supplies , and quiet. The workspace should allow you to provide some supervision. 

If you have multiple kids trying to complete their homework at one time, you may want to find a separate location for each child. Sometimes kids can complete their homework together at the kitchen table, but other times having siblings around can be distracting. Do what works best for your family.

Put It All Together

Now that you know what your child's needs and concerns are for finding a time to do homework, you need to come up with the actual plan. Creating a homework routine is really just one piece of creating a daily school year routine .

For the homework time itself, get it down on paper so you can see exactly what they will be doing and when they will be doing it. Do this for each day of the week if you have different activities on different weekdays. Students who are assigned larger projects will need to review their homework plans regularly to make adjustments as needed.

Expect your child to work consistently throughout the assigned time. Avoid having multiple homework sessions, such as one before dinner and a second one after dinner. Starting and stopping may mean children may spend more time getting into what they are doing than working continuously.

Be Consistent

Once you have decided on a time to do homework, stick to the plan! It usually takes about three weeks for most children to really get into the habit of their new schedule.

If your child or teen has difficulty maintaining concentration for the length of time that their homework should take, then you may want to carefully consider breaking up the work to take advantage of the time when your child can focus.

This added step is especially important for children and teens with depression or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). They may benefit from multiple smaller work sessions and more frequent breaks.

Even though the idea behind creating a homework schedule is to get your child to work consistently and independently, you may need to look over their work when they are done. This is especially important for younger children.

Make sure they understand their assignments and that they completed a reasonable amount of work during the homework session. If you find your child is having trouble actually working during their homework time, troubleshoot to find out what might be the issue. Sometimes kids need extra help and other times they simply need more motivation to get their work done.

If you find that your child continues to struggle with homework even with a schedule in place, you might need to dig a little deeper. Consider discussing your child's issues with their teacher or pediatrician.

Sometimes kids are reluctant to complete their homework because of undiagnosed learning disabilities. It could be that your child struggles with reading comprehension or has a processing disorder. Or it could be that your child is struggling with a mental health issue like anxiety .

A Word From Verywell

Establishing a homework schedule allows children to build some important life skills that will help them as they navigate high school, college, and eventually the workforce. Practice is important when kids are learning new skills. So, having a nightly homework routine enhances your child's learning. Just be sure you aren't requiring homework time at the expense of being a kid. Having time to play is just as important to a child's development as learning new material.

National Institute of Mental Health. Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder .

By Lisa Linnell-Olsen Lisa Linnell-Olsen has worked as a support staff educator, and is well-versed in issues of education policy and parenting issues.

5th Graders and Homework

• Marlene Gundlach
• Categories : Parenting grade school aged kids
• Tags : Teaching grades pre k to 5

The 5th Grader

As a student enters 5th grade, they already have about 5 years of homework behind them. But, as they approach middle school, the amount of homework increases and the level of independence required increases as well. They are entering those pre-teen years and begin to think they know it all, but still need the guidance of their teachers and parents. Fifth grade is an important year as students prepare for the increased responsibilities that accompany middle school and this 5th grade homework help can be a useful tool. Often they are presented with more long-term projects that require time management skills, math becomes more complex, and writing assignments cover more advanced concepts. Reading and science may also become more analytical. Teachers no longer check that homework is written down; the level of academic responsibility in 6th grade is greater. This can be a make-it or break-it year as students prepare students for these changes.

Organizational Skills

The first part of helping your fifth grader with homework is to be sure he is organized. My children have an agenda that is provided to them by their school for recording their daily homework. If your child’s school does not provide this, purchase a planner or small notebook where he can write down assignments. My middle schooler is able to access a classroom portal where the teacher posts homework assignments. We try not to rely on it because it does not teach him to be responsible for his assignments, but it is a nice back up. It is also useful when he misses school and we can check to see what he is missing. If your child falls behind on assignments, then when test-time comes, it will be even more difficult to be prepared.

Also be sure you keep a calendar with dates for practices, games, recitals, and other family activities at the ready. If there is a huge science project due on a Monday and you know you will be out of town the entire weekend before it’s due, make sure it is done early. This will save you some late nights. There will be plenty of those in college, no need to do them now!

Now, once the work is written down, it has to make it home. Depending on what your school requires, you need to purchase some type of binder or accordion for keeping papers. We like to use something that has sections for each subject and one for homework. It provides a straight-forward way of organizing school work.

Study Skills

As students enter 5th grade and work their way to middle school, they are taking more tests that require studying. Some students do not need to spend a tremendous amount of time studying ….they’re the lucky ones. If your child has a study guide for a test, be sure

he completes it. These are an easy way to gauge what will be covered on a test and what concepts still need to be reinforced by your child. Everyone studies differently. There are several methods to choose from when studying for a test:

• Make flash cards : Use index cards and write down vocabulary or concepts to be covered. My son even has an ap on his iTouch that is called flash cards. He uses it to study vocabulary words.
• Oral quiz : Use the study guide or notes to ask your child questions. If you ask open ended questions where he has to just give up the information he will be more prepared. The more he has to put information into his own words, the more you can be sure he understands the information.
• Copy the study guide : There’s a reason it is called a study guide, it’s meant to guide you with what you have to study. If you can plan ahead, copy the study guide before your child fills it in. You can then give to him to fill out without the use of notes as a quiz.
• Go over notes : Take a look at the notes your child takes. You may be able to offer suggestions if they are hard to follow or understand. If his notes are not usable, then he is in for an uphill battle. Note-taking is a critical skill as students move toward middle and high school.
• Difficult information : If you find that your child is struggling with a fact or two, look for a few tricks to help with their memory. Make up a rhyme or acronym that will help remember the fact.

One critical component of homework is the atmosphere in which you child works. Set up a study environment that will breed success. Their table or desk should be clutter free, have adequate light, and all of the materials should be near by. Some kids can work with a little background music, some can not. You have to gauge what works for your child. My kids are okay with usually saving their homework for a little later after school, some may need to get to it immediately after school. You have to tinker with what works in your home with your child. Just because the neighbor makes their kids hit the books as soon as they walk off the bus doesn’t meant that will work in your home.

Homeschooling 5th Grade [Complete Guide+Competency Checklist]

Suggested School Supplies

• Pencil sharpener
• Lined paper, spiral notebooks and/or composition notebooks
• Binders (if needed)
• Colored pencils
• Highlighters
• Paints (tempera and watercolor)
• Paintbrushes
• Paper for painting
• Construction paper
• Dry erase markers
• Children’s scissors (sharp-pointed)
• Glue sticks
• Math manipulatives
• Sight word flashcards
• Math flashcards (ex. multiplication tables)
• Bookmarks (for longer books)
• Wall maps of the world and the United States
• Library card

Fifth Grade Milestones by Subject

Fifth Grade Language Arts Homeschool

• Decodes unknown words using phonics and context clues.
• Able to read independently and silently.
• Determines the main idea of a story.
• Identifies basic parts of a story (setting, characters, plot, etc…).
• Connects texts she reads to her life, other books, and the world.
• Able to summarize a story orally or in writing.
• Able to identify genre (realistic fiction, historical fiction, fantasy, non-fiction, etc…).
• Easily identifies parts of speech.
• Spells frequently used words and 5th-grade spelling words correctly.

Writing for 5th Graders

• Writes legibly in print and cursive.
• Organizes three-paragraph pieces (non-fiction or fiction) with a beginning, middle, and end.
• Writes to express feelings, tell stories, and summarize information.
• Responds to comprehension questions using complete sentences.
• Able to vary sentence structure.
• Able to identify the parts of speech.
• Spells frequently used words and 5th-grade spelling/vocabulary words correctly.
• Writes for different purposes and is becoming familiar with different forms of writing. (expository, descriptive, persuasive, and narrative).

History and Social Studies for 5th Graders

• Understands the principles of the U.S. free enterprise system.
• Able to quote the first line of the Declaration of Independence and the Preamble to the United States Constitution.
• Understands the cause and effects of European colonization and recognizes important figures.
• Understands the events that led up to the American Revolution including the Boston Tea Party, French and Indian War and important figures.
• Able to identify our Founding Fathers and Patriot heroes.
• Understands political, economic, and social changes that occurred in the United States during the 19th century.
• Applies geographic tools to construct and interpret maps as well as translate data into a variety of formats. Tools used include grid systems, legends, symbols, scales, and compass roses.
• Understands the different political, population, and economic regions in the U.S.
• Able to locate major political and physical features on a map such as the 50 states and their capitals, regions such as the Southwest and the Northeast; and the Rocky Mountains and Mississippi River.
• Understands the main ideas in the Declaration of Independence, the U.S. Constitution, and the Bill of Rights.
• Compares the differences and responsibilities of national and state governments.

5th Grade Math

Http://ritter.tea.state.tx.us/rules/tac/chapter111/ch111a.html#111.6.

• Understands relationships as related to place value of the digit in decimals through the thousandths.
• Able to compare and order two decimals to thousandths and represent comparisons using the symbols >, <, or =.
• Able to round decimals to tenths or hundredths.
• Adds, subtracts, multiplies, and divides multi-digit numbers accurately.
• Able to add and subtract decimals.
• Multiplies three-digit numbers by two-digit numbers accurately and with ease.
• Solves quotients of up to a four-digit dividend by a two-digit divisor.
• Introduces algebraic reasoning and is able to represent and solve multi-step problems involving the four operations with whole numbers using equations with a letter standing for the unknown quantity.
• Determines the volume of cubes and rectangular prisms.
• Understands with fluency how to graph an ordered pair, such as (2,5).
• Collects and organizes data.
• Knowledgeable in financial resources to sustain lifetime financial security.
• Able to explain the difference between gross income and net income; and income tax, payroll tax, sales tax and property tax.
• Understands the advantages and disadvantages of different methods of payment, including checks, credit cards, debit cards and electronic payments.
• Develops a system for keeping and using financial records and is able to balance a simple budget.
• Able to describe actions that might be taken to balance a budget when expenses exceed income.

Science for 5th Graders

• Able to differentiate between inherited traits and learned behaviors.
• Knows the differences between renewable and nonrenewable resources.
• Able to organize, examine and evaluate data using current technology and tools.
• Collects, records, and analyzes information using tools and materials to support observations of habitats or organisms such as terrariums and aquariums.
• Understands that the Earth’s surface is constantly changing and recognizes how landforms such as deltas, canyons, and sand dunes are the result of changes to the Earth’s surface by wind, water, or ice.
• Able to differentiate between weather and climate.
• Easily identifies and explains the different characteristics of the Sun, Earth, and Moon.
• Able to explain how the Sun and our oceans interact in the water cycle.
• Identifies that the Earth rotates on its axis causing a day/night cycle every 24 hours.
• Knows that organisms have structures and behaviors that help them live and survive within their environments such as hooves on prairie animals or webbed feet in aquatic animals.

Good Citizenship for 5th Graders

• Become involved in events and initiatives such as Capitol Days sponsored by THSC.
• Learn about the electoral process in local, state, and national elections.
• Register to vote and vote! Take your child with you to see the process. Children under the age of 18 are allowed to go with you and even go inside the booth with you in every state in the United States.
• Write a letter to your elected officials in support or against legislation affecting lives within your community. Start a letter-writing campaign to get others involved!
• Attend city council meetings and discover the workings of your town.
• Learn about local and national non-profit organizations and how each serves your community such as the United Way or the Boys and Girls Clubs of America. Discuss as a family if you’d like to volunteer at a non-profit in your community.
• Attend rallies of causes you believe in as a family.
• How is your town significant in Texas history? Find out! Visit the library or chat with a local historian.
• Learn the words to “Texas, Our Texas” and discover the meaning and history of the Pledge to the Texas Flag and the Pledge of Allegiance.
• Discover how each of us affects the environment from how much water we use to how much trash we produce. Then, discuss and implement ways you as a family can lessen your footprint.
• Learn about recycling and where and how you recycle items in your community.
• Keep our state clean by picking up litter everywhere you go.
• Do you know the mayor of your town or your state representatives? Identify leaders in state, local and national governments as a family, including our governor, local members of the Texas Legislature, U.S. senators, local U.S. representatives, your town’s mayor, and Texans who have been president of the United States

Developmental Milestones for Ten-Year-Olds

Gross motor skills.

• Increased physical endurance makes longer walks or bike rides easier.
• Shows increased body awareness and signs of a growing, maturing body.
• Able to adjust speed, force, and direction depending on the situation.
• May complain of growing pains or muscle cramps.

Fine Motor Skills

• Manual dexterity continues to increase.
• Writes legibly in cursive and print.
• Able to type on a keyboard at a minimum of 10 words per minute.
• Uses table utensils properly; able to cut food with a knife and fork independently.

Talking and Understanding

• Has a deeper understanding of how relationships with others can include more than just common interests.
• Begins to understand the points of view of others.
• More aware of others’ perceptions.
• May be uncertain about changes happening in their bodies with puberty.
• May face strong peer pressure and find it hard to resist if they struggle with self-esteem.
• Has a first crush or pretends to have crushes to fit in with peers.
• Able to resolve social problems, like fights with friends and siblings.
• Sense of what is important is influenced more by friends.
• Enjoys being part of a team, group, or club.
• Are kind, silly, and curious, but also can be self-involved, moody, and disrespectful.
• May test out new attitudes, clothing styles, and mannerisms while figuring out where/how to fit in.
• Delivers messages clearly and confidently.
• Asks relevant questions.
• Uses complex sentences and different types of sentences to express ideas clearly.
• Ready for oral presentations in front of an audience.

10 Great Books or Series for Homeschooling 5th Graders

• Frindle by Andrew Clements. When Nick Allen learns some interesting facts about how words are created, he starts a phenomenon as his new word for pen, frindle, takes over his classroom, the city and then goes nationwide!
• Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfery. introduces us to Artemis Fowl–millionaire 12-year-old genius and criminal mastermind. When Artemis kidnaps the leader of the fairies, he meets his match when he discovers that these fairies aren’t the sweet ones from bedtime stories. These fairies are armed and dangerous.
• The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. In this seven-book series by C.S. Lewis, readers learn about the characters that have fascinated fans for 70 years. Selected as one of America’s Top 100 Most-Loved Novels by PBS’s The Great American Read, readers join in epic battles against good and evil, discover forever friendships and horrible betrayals and meet the fantastic creatures that encompass Narnia.
• Hero Tales by Dave and Neta Jackson. In this beautifully illustrated treasury, Dave and Neta Jackson present the true-life stories of fifteen key Christian heroes. Each hero is profiled in a short biography and three educational yet exciting and thought-provoking anecdotes from his or her life.
• The Incredible Journey by Sheila Burnford. This beloved classic that inspired the movie Homeward Bound has captured the hearts of generations of readers. The lengths to which these three animals will go for each other and for their owner make for a thrilling and thoroughly unforgettable tale.
• On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness (The Wingfeather Saga) by Andrew Peterson. Full of characters rich in heart, smarts, and courage, On the Edge of the Dark Sea of Darkness is a tale children of all ages will cherish, families can read aloud, and readers’ groups are sure to enjoy discussing for its many layers of meaning.
• Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie. The classic tale of mischievous Peter Pan, swashbuckling pirates, budding romance, and all sorts of adventures on Neverland. The book explores the conflict between the innocence of childhood and the responsibility of adulthood in a charming and witty way.
• Stuart Little by E.B. White. The classic story by E. B. White, author of the Newbery Honor Book Charlotte’s Web and The Trumpet of the Swan , is about one small mouse on a very big adventure. Stuart Little is no ordinary mouse. Born to a family of humans, he lives in New York City with his parents, his older brother George, and Snowbell the cat. Though he’s shy and thoughtful, he’s also a true lover of adventure.

10 Awesome Field Trips for Homeschooling 5th Graders

• First Responder Appreciation: Police, fire, and EMS stations are located throughout most cities. Locate the one closest to your house and make a connection. Tour a fire station, talk to a police officer or reach out to an emergency medical technician and find out what it truly means to be a first responder.
• Government: THSC Capitol Days are one-day, hands-on events that allow homeschooling families to fully participate in the state legislative process. These events give the opportunity to defend the rights of homeschool families in Texas, meet representatives and staff and actually help pass a law. A free grade-specific tour is available at our Texas state capitol , which includes history, architecture and the legislative process.
• Job Fair: Has your child shown an interest in an activity or profession? Ask around! Many professionals are quick to assist. Discover the ins and outs of what makes their jobs unique while helping guide an eager learner into a possible career choice.
• Historical Sites: Enjoy the freedom of homeschooling by bringing your homeschool studies to life. Visit the places you are learning about each day! Tour places close to home or go on a trip through Texas and learn along the way.
• Museums: Name it and Texas has it as a museum! From Fair Park in downtown Dallas with its “only intact and unaltered pre-1950s world fair site in the United States,” to the Battle for Texas – The Experience in San Antonio revealing the daily lives of early Texas settlers and the tensions leading up to the Texas Revolution, our museums are abundant and unsurpassed.
• Sports: Have you visited the Heart of Texas and gone to the Texas Sports Hall of Fame ? Offering educational tours for groups from 15 to 30, the field trips focus on physical fitness and health as well as drug awareness and Major League Math. If you are going in smaller groups, don’t worry. The museum is open to the public and offers a collection of memorabilia and history perfect for any sport’s enthusiast. Check ahead before your visit! The museum is closed on Baylor University’s game days.
• Libraries: Libraries throughout our state offer summer programs, spring break activities, and clubs and events throughout the year for all ages. Take advantage of free programs and educational opportunities and make new friends while you’re there.
• Theater/Music/Art: In March 2018, scientists at the National Institutes of Health Kennedy Center Workshop on Music and the Brain concluded that music promotes language development and has a positive impact on cognitive functions including attention, visual-spatial perception, and executive function (childdevelopmentinfo.com). Music, art, and theater will open your child’s mind to other worlds and possibilities. Opportunities to view the arts are available everywhere! Grab a blanket and head to a free outdoor concert, stroll through a sculpture garden or grab those tickets to the latest must-see show.
• Get Outside: There’s no better place to learn about ecosystems than in your own backyard. Search for insects, nests and other furry habitats. Simply walking around noticing nature opens up a world of insights and conversations.
• Living History: Nothing solidifies new knowledge like hands-on learning. Museums and special events throughout Texas offer presentations and workshops that keep the craftsmanship, allure, and heirloom skills of our past available for your family to learn today. Do you have a state park nearby? Check their schedules at https://tpwd.texas.gov/state-parks/ to see what fun, heritage events they have planned, especially around the holidays!

Science Experiments for 5th Graders

• Quick Sand – Nature’s Trap of Solids and Liquids
• Sounds Wave – All You Need Is a Spoon and Some String
• Supplement – How Fast Does Sound Travel worksheet
• Endothermic Reactions – Let’s Bake a Cake!
• Discover Terrariums with Dionaea muscipula, Our Favorite Insectivorous !

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About the author: dawn michelle michals.

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Thank you for the guide, it help me learn to teach my 5th grader (John) get in to school.

I’m glad this was helpful. Blessings, Customer Relations

How many hours a day do most people homeschool? Do you think 70+ year-old grandparents can successfully homeschool one 5th grader? I’m exploring the possibility because of COVID.

Dear Elaine,

That depends on the state in which you live. In Texas, there are no required reporting hours. Many families homeschool 3-5 hours per day, for a child in the 5th grade. That can vary based on the child’s abilities. In Texas, a grandparent can homeschool for a parent, as long as the parent oversees the homeschool, or a grandparent with custody and the right to educate, can homeschool the child.

Check your state requirements and learn more at https://homeeducator.com/getting-started/state-requirements/

Blessings, Ashley – Customer Relations

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Homework Help for Kids: Supporting Your Learner

Help your child finish homework with confidence using these simple guidelines..

Homework help should, of course, be age-dependent, decreasing in intensity as your children get older. Your 1st grader may need you to sit down with her each day in order to make sure she understands her assignment and has the materials necessary to complete it, while your 5th grader should be able to work independently. But children of any age can feel overwhelmed or confused by homework from time to time. Assist by reviewing directions and helping to set priorities.

The 10-Minute Rule Part of the issue, say many teachers and education experts, is that children are often being given too much homework too soon. The National Education Association (among other organizations) recommends no more than 10 minutes of homework per grade level per night. In other words, a 2nd grader should be spending about 20 minutes a day on homework, and a 5th grader no more than an hour. If you find that this 10-minute rule is greatly being exceeded, that assignments are going unfinished, or that exhaustion and frustration levels running high — it's time to talk to the teacher. She may need to modify the type or amount of work, or your child may need some extra help in certain areas.

Every Child Is Different Another landmine in the field of homework involves parental expectations. Dealing with siblings with such vastly divergent styles can be challenging. "Know thy child" is the most important commandment for parents, according to clinical psychologist Ruth Peters, Ph.D. Pay attention to each child's personal study habits. For example, don't hover over a self-starter, but do let a wildly energetic kid ride her bike for 15 minutes after school before settling down to do homework.

Tips for Easing Angst Whether the kitchen table is Homework Central or your child works better in the quiet of his own room, there are several things you can do to ensure that assignments are completed with maximum efficiency and minimum angst:

• Understand your child's physical needs, and make sure they are met before homework starts. Most kids will need a healthy snack, and many will need to blow off some steam with physical exercise. Let them run — but set a time limit.
• Set a regular homework schedule. With myriad extracurricular activities and sports schedules, it may not always be possible for your child to do homework at the same time every day. Still, a regular routine works best, whether it's right after school or immediately after dinner.
• Have your child track daily assignments in a notebook or planner.  Stay organized ! Many schools provide a homework "agenda book" or something similar. If not, buy your own.
• Designate a homework area , and make sure your child has all the supplies she needs. Small, clear, plastic stacking boxes are perfect for holding — and keeping visible — sharpened pencils, markers, staplers, paper clips, rulers, calculators, etc.
• Come up with a system to ensure that homework is not only completed, but turned in. Peters recommends using two clear pocket folders, one marked "homework to be done" and the other "completed homework." If the completed homework is visible in the same place every day, it's more likely to end up in the backpack the next morning.

Because differences are our greatest strength

Homework anxiety: Why it happens and how to help

By Gail Belsky

Expert reviewed by Jerome Schultz, PhD

Quick tips to help kids with homework anxiety

Quick tip 1, try self-calming strategies..

Try some deep breathing, gentle stretching, or a short walk before starting homework. These strategies can help reset the mind and relieve anxiety. 

Quick tip 2

Set a time limit..

Give kids a set amount of time for homework to help it feel more manageable. Try using the “10-minute rule” that many schools use — that’s 10 minutes of homework per grade level. And let kids know it’s OK to stop working for the night.

Quick tip 3

Cut out distractions..

Have kids do homework in a quiet area. Turn off the TV, silence cell phones, and, if possible, limit people coming and going in the room or around the space.

Quick tip 4

Start with the easiest task..

Try having kids do the easiest, quickest assignments first. That way, they’ll feel good about getting a task done — and may be less anxious about the rest of the homework.

Quick tip 5

Use a calm voice..

When kids feel anxious about homework, they might get angry, yell, or cry. Avoid matching their tone of voice. Take a deep breath and keep your voice steady and calm. Let them know you’re there for them. 

Sometimes kids just don’t want to do homework. They complain, procrastinate, or rush through the work so they can do something fun. But for other kids, it’s not so simple. Homework may actually give them anxiety.

It’s not always easy to know when kids have homework anxiety. Some kids may share what they’re feeling when you ask. But others can’t yet identify what they’re feeling, or they're not willing to talk about it.

Homework anxiety often starts in early grade school. It can affect any child. But it’s an especially big issue for kids who are struggling in school. They may think they can’t do the work. Or they may not have the right support to get it done. 

Keep in mind that some kids may seem anxious about homework but are actually anxious about something else. That’s why it’s important to keep track of when kids get anxious and what they were doing right before. The more you notice what’s happening, the better you can help.

Dive deeper

What homework anxiety looks like.

Kids with homework anxiety might:

Find excuses to avoid homework

Lie about homework being done

Get consistently angry about homework

Be moody or grumpy after school

Complain about not feeling well after school or before homework time

Cry easily or seem overly sensitive

Be afraid of making even small mistakes

Shut down and not want to talk after school

Say “I can’t do it!” before even trying

Learn about other homework challenges kids might be facing . 

Why kids get homework anxiety

Kids with homework anxiety are often struggling with a specific skill. They might worry about falling behind their classmates. But there are other factors that cause homework anxiety: 

Test prep: Homework that helps kids prepare for a test makes it sound very important. This can raise stress levels.

Perfectionism: Some kids who do really well in a subject may worry that their work “won’t be good enough.”

Trouble managing emotions: For kids who easily get flooded by emotions, homework can be a trigger for anxiety. 

Too much homework: Sometimes kids are anxious because they have more work than they can handle.

Use this list to see if kids might have too much homework .

When kids are having homework anxiety, families, educators, and health care providers should work together to understand what’s happening. Start by sharing notes on what you’re seeing and look for patterns . By working together, you’ll develop a clearer sense of what’s going on and how to help.

Parents and caregivers: Start by asking questions to get your child to open up about school . But if kids are struggling with the work itself, they may not want to tell you. You’ll need to talk with your child’s teacher to get insight into what’s happening in school and find out if your child needs help in a specific area.

Explore related topics

clock This article was published more than  10 years ago

Five tips to get kids to focus on homework

When my daughter began the routines of first grade and its attendant homework assignments last fall, my husband and I girded ourselves for this new thing to work into our scrambled evenings. Assigned on Monday, due back on Friday, supposed to be completed by doing 10 minutes a night. Reasonable enough, right?

We celebrated her efforts and her commitment to homework, for, after all, she’s being raised in the era of “ NurtureShock .” But as the weeks went on, I was feeling increasingly inept at steering her back on track when she started doodling or lying down on her chair. When sitting still was the last thing she wanted to do after a day cooped up inside. When her little sister was noisily, happily, inviting her to build a fort.

There had to be a better way than this tug-of-war that frustrated everyone. So I talked with a few teachers, study-skills educators and a school counselor, and I asked them how to get an elementary school-age kid to focus on her homework (and maybe her piano practice, too). Here’s what they said:

1) Talk to the teacher . Huh? My daughter was getting her homework done, so why bug the teacher, I thought. However, if things are always turned in on time and correct, the teacher won’t know how long it really takes and how challenging it is for kids, says Amy McCready, the founder of  PositiveParentingSolutions.com . Ask teachers: How long should homework take? (And let them know how long it’s taking your child.) What is the goal of homework? Is it “completion, learning, grading, a hoop to jump through?” asks Mark Wallace, who teaches third through fifth graders at Highlands Elementary in Edina, Minn. Is it okay for parents to check homework so that kids can fix any mistakes before turning it in, or do teachers want to see those mistakes so they can get an accurate sense of how well kids are understanding the lesson? If your above-grade-level kid breezes through five math problems, does she really need to do all of them? Finally, be clear with the teacher that in your house …

2) … Your kid’s homework is her responsibility, not the parents’ responsibility . This one took me a little bit to buy into. It’s a big leap of faith to let kids choose how to manage their time, and to allow them to face the consequences if they don’t. The corollary is establishing the new ground rules for how you help up front so you can support them while letting them work independently. McCready coached me through making this change: “Sit down ahead of time and talk about the assignment: ‘How do you think you’ll go about answering these questions?’ Then you can say, ‘Sounds like you’re on the right track,’” leave them to work uninterrupted and then check their work when they’re done. McCready also recommends being clear about your boundaries, for example, “I am available to help you after dinner from 6:30 to 8 p.m.. After that, the help desk is closed,” and reminding them that help desk hours and bedtime don’t get extended just because they didn’t get their work done yet. If getting started is the biggest hurdle, “start out by giving them a choice,” suggests Susan Kruger, the president of SOAR Learning , a study skills company based in Lake Orion, Mich. “‘Would you like to do it now or in 10 minutes from now?’… It puts them in a position of feeling they have some say, and that goes a long way of getting cooperation with homework.”

3) Set a timer … and take a break. Time management is hard, especially for kids who are just learning to tell time. Many of the experts I spoke with encouraged using timers. McCready likes ones that help kids visualize how much time is left, such as Timetimer . You can use timers for the scenario Kruger describes. “When you work in small increments — uninterrupted focused time, with breaks in between — you’re able to get more done,” says Zac Stowell, a fifth grade teacher at Northgate Elementary in Seattle. Breaks might include a snack, but ones with physical activity are good, too: a set of jumping jacks, a walk up the street, running up and down the stairs. And if the break is dragging on too long, Stowell says, “you let them know, ‘The more we extend it, the less time we have to do other fun stuff.’”

4) It’s okay to fail. Homework anxiety affects kids and parents, and so does this mantra. “Early elementary school, that’s a really safe time to fail,” says Wallace. If kids don’t get their homework done, he says, “I’d like them to walk in and say, ‘Here’s my plan for finishing it, and here’s my plan for next week.’” There may be all kinds of things you’d like kids to improve upon when you’re looking at their homework, from not bringing it home all crumpled to using capital letters, punctuation and proper spelling, he says. “I always tell parents, ‘Pick one thing that you’re going to go after that night.’” When kids feel overwhelmed by criticism, they tend to shut down, just like adults. To boost their spirits when they get into the “I’ll never get it/I’m no good/It’s too hard” doldrums, point out all the things they used to find hard that are now easy, such as tying their shoes, says Gerry Rice, a Suzuki violin and viola teacher in Haddonfield, N.J.

5) Get help. If homework is still a struggle or taking longer than the teacher expects, get an outside perspective and find out what’s going on. “You can get a neighbor kid who’s four or more years older who can sit down with them to do homework” or swap kids with a neighbor, Kruger says. In other cases, she says, consider a tutor or other professional to uncover what’s behind some learning challenges. Kids are all different, and so are their optimal learning styles and study environments, and parents can help by shaping homework settings to meet their needs. As you’re feeling your way, remember, “we want our students to make mistakes,” Kruger says. “It’s the only way they’re going to be able to innovate and adapt to the world and the way the world changes.”

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What’s the right amount of homework for my students?

Sara Austin May 25, 2022

Whether in their K-12 experience or in college, most teachers can remember a time when they felt overwhelmed by the amount of homework they were asked to do. Homework has been a staple of the school experience since the early days of formal education. Over the years, however, research has shown that more is not always better when it comes to homework. Some students, such as primary students, see no benefit from homework, while high school students see only limited benefits.

The truth is that homework is a controversial subject, even among school teachers. Every student is different — some are self-motivated and independent, while others need constant supervision in order to succeed. These differences can lead to disagreement regarding the optimal amount of homework that should be assigned. As a result, the question of how much homework to assign can be difficult to answer.

Too much homework can negatively impact students in ways you might not expect. Understanding these impacts will make you a better, more effective, and more empathetic teacher to your students. Let’s begin by looking at some of the ways that homework can negatively impact students. Then, we’ll look at recommendations for how much homework is appropriate at different grade levels.

School work can worsen the impacts of lack of access for vulnerable students

One of the lessons learned during the pandemic is that access to resources among students varied widely. The underlying inequities facing students meant that some students could continue their education remotely while others fell behind.

According to a study from Pew Research , one in five teens struggle to complete their homework because they don’t have access to the internet or a home computer. Even with the best intentions, homework poses an unequal burden on students, depending on their socioeconomic status. Students of lower socioeconomic status are less likely to have the resources that help them do homework, such as a computer or a quiet place to work. They’re more likely than their wealthier peers to live in noisy neighborhoods and work after a school day.

While some students may have access to computers, they may not have free access to the internet at home. These factors make it harder for disadvantaged students to complete assignments at home effectively — and this means it’s harder for them to get the same kind of education that their advantaged peers are getting.

The pandemic revealed at least two areas where inequity impacted student success.

The resource accessibility gap

Some students simply don’t have access to resources that make it possible to do their school work. Kids from middle- to high-income families often have computers, access to the internet, and a quiet place to study with no distractions. In contrast, low-income kids may live in a noisy home shared by many people or are sent to an unsafe neighborhood library where they can be at risk of being approached by strangers. Some students may live in places where there is no internet at all.

The pandemic also revealed inequities in the amount of assistance students would receive from their parents or guardians. Many low-income students were home alone all day as their parents worked in essential jobs such as the service industry. Without anyone at home to help with their schoolwork or to help kids stay on track, these kids suffered massive learning losses that will take years to recover from.

The learning accessibility gap

Some students learn more effectively from an interactive teacher than from a textbook or online video, and they need help understanding the material gained through homework assignments. Having additional time with a teacher (in class, after school, or over the phone) can be helpful for these students. Wealthy parents can pay for tutors and extra classes — low-income parents cannot afford such luxuries.

These disparities, which are not always obvious to teachers, can have long-lasting effects on the academic success of low-income and minority students.

Homework can lead to greater stress and conflict in the home

Homework can have negative impacts on students’ home lives since it can be a catalyst for family conflicts. For example, a child with hours of homework may come home from school and have to spend hours completing it, leaving little time to eat dinner before going to bed. With too much homework, family time is replaced by homework time, especially when parents have to help their children with their work. In this scenario, parents spend their time in the afternoons and evenings policing schoolwork rather than nurturing family bonds in important ways.

The education level of parents also plays a role. Parents with a college degree tend to have more confidence in helping their children with homework, but many parents do not have a college degree. In these households, homework is a significant stressor. These parents do not feel comfortable helping with school work and expect their children to have learned everything they need to know in order to complete their homework. Without parental support or assistance, these children can fall even further behind.

School work can also take time away from their hobbies and other interests, leading to poor mental health. In addition, the pressure of homework takes away children’s freedom, as they cannot spend time exploring other interests or building relationships with family and friends.

Homework can even have negative impacts on students’ academic performance

Many studies have shown that homework offers no benefit in elementary school and, due to the impacts of academic stress and inequity, can even be detrimental. Feelings of stress and fear can lead to resentment and a generally negative outlook on the entire educational experience, for both students and their parents. These feelings then color the child’s perception of school, leading some to hate it.

It’s also worth asking if homework is really necessary. Research has found little evidence of a correlation between how much time kids spend on math and reading homework and how well they perform in these subjects once they’re back in class.

Assigning the right amount of homework

So how can we be sure to assign the right amount of homework? While there is some debate on this, the answer is actually quite simple: it depends. Fortunately, research has been done in this area that provides some clarity. The right amount of homework depends on the age and ability of students and the subject matter.  

Homework by grade level

The National Education Association offers a simple guideline to help you determine how much homework is appropriate at each grade level. This framework is also endorsed by the National Parent Teacher Association National Parent Teachers Association .

According to this rule, time spent on homework each night should not exceed:

• 30 minutes in 3 rd grade
• 40 minutes in 4 th grade
• 50 minutes in 5 th grade
• 60 minutes in 6 th grade
• 70 minutes in 7 th grade
• 80 minutes in 8 th grade

Worried that you might be assigning too much? Talk to your students about how long they spend on homework and adjust accordingly. Remember that the point of homework is to support learning and not to cause undue stress. Students need to be able to complete their assignments in order to learn, but they also shouldn’t be overwhelmed with too many tasks.

Homework by subject matter

The homework you assign should also differ based on the subject. For example, while your fifth grader may benefit from nightly math worksheets, your third grader’s homework should include more reading exercises than daily arithmetic assignments.

Remember that the amount of help that students get from parents at home can vary a great deal. For this reason, the homework you assign should be work students can complete on their own, without the need for parental help.

The Homework Debate

Many schools are doing away with homework all together. This is because, after decades of research, there is still no evidence of any academic benefit of take-home work in grades K-8 and very little to support it in high school either. 

The main thing to remember is this: simply increasing the amount of homework that a child has will not make them more successful. On the contrary, assigning too much homework — or the wrong kind — could actually harm their development.

Keep in mind what you are trying to accomplish with homework. Is the homework intended to give the student practice in completing a task? Is it to improve test scores? Research has actually shown that students who do more than 90 minutes of homework tend to have lower test scores than those who do less . As you consider homework for your students, remember that many of the factors influencing homework performance are not visible to you, and that you should always prioritize quality over quantity.

Photo Credit: Google Education

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How To Motivate Child To Do Homework (7 Practical Tips)

Kid is on almost every parent’s mind right now.

Getting kids to do homework is not always painful.

In fact, it can be outright fun!

In this article, I will share the secret on motivating your child to not only do homework but also love homework.

Yes, you read it right.

It is possible to love doing school work.

No yelling, screaming, threatening or crying required.

Table of Contents

Why Do Kids Hate Homework

Let’s start with kindergarteners.

For many children, kindergarten is their first formal experience in school.

Kindergarten has changed a lot over the last decade.

Once a place for socialization and play, kindergartens now emphasize the importance of learning to read, to count, to sit still and to listen to the teachers.

Going from playing all day at home to behaving or sitting still in a structured environment for hours at a time is a tough transition.

To add to that, many kindergartens also assign homework to these little children, further reducing their available play time.

It’s no wonder that some kindergarteners are not motivated to do homework.

Homework Motivation

Remember when your child was still a toddler, he/she would get into anything and everything?

They were curious and they were eager to learn about everything around them.

They were passionate learners .

Children naturally love learning, if we provide the right environment and motivate them appropriately.

Here’s the problem…

When you hear the word “motivate”, what do you think of it?

If you’re thinking about toys, money, iPad time, points, stickers, etc., you’re not alone.

Rewards (and sometimes punishments) are many parents’ go-to motivators.

Parents love them because they work almost instantly.

You present the prize and the child complies to get it. Problem solved.

Simple and effective.

But very soon, you will notice some unintended results.

Here is an example.

Some years ago, after a lecture, Professor Mark Lepper was approached by a couple who told him about a system of rewards they had set up for their son, which had produced much improved behavior at the dinner table. “He sits up straight and eats his peas and the Brussels sprouts and he is really very well behaved,” they reported. Until, that is, the first time the family dined at a nice restaurant. The child looked around, picked up a crystal glass from the table and asked, “How many points not to drop this?” A fine example, says Dr. Lepper, of the detrimental effects of over-reliance on rewards to shape children’s behavior. Mark Lepper: Intrinsic Motivation, Extrinsic Motivation and the Process of Learning By Christine VanDeVelde Luskin, Bing Nursery School at Stanford University

This example is far from rare.

In fact, it is very common when a child is motivated purely by an external reward.

Once the reward is removed, the child will no longer be interested in continuing the behavior.

What’s the right way to motivate children ?

The answer is intrinsic motivation.

Intrinsic motivation for kids refers to engaging in an activity for its pure enjoyment.

This enjoyment comes from within an individual and is a psychological satisfaction derived from performing the task, not from an extrinsic outcome.

In other words, to get your kid to do homework, first help them enjoy doing it .

It is not as crazy as it sounds.

It’s unfortunate that homework is called “work”.

We like to separate work from play.

So naturally, we feel that homework is drudgery.

But it doesn’t have to be.

Homework is a tool for children to learn and get familiar with the knowledge taught in class.

To enjoy homework, the child has to enjoy learning .

How To Motivate a Child To Do Homework

To motivate kids, we first change our mindset, from a working mindset to a learning mindset .

The goal of going to school is not about getting into college, finding a good job, earning a stable income, etc.

Of course, all of those are wonderful, but that’s a working mindset – you’re doing all that work for reasons other than enjoying the learning itself.

Going to school is about learning , acquiring knowledge, exploring new subjects and growing as a person.

In the US, the average expected years of schooling is 16.7 years ​1​ .

If a child doesn’t like school, that will be 16.7 years of misery.

You don’t want that for your child.

But here’s the good news.

If you can intervene early, like in kindergarten or even before kindergarten, your child will be getting off to a good start.

So, convince yourself to change from the working mindset to the learning mindset.

It sounds abstract, but here are 7 tangible steps for moving toward that goal.

1. Stop referring to kid doing homework as your child’s “job”

When you call it a “job”, you are implying that it will be all work and no fun.

Doing that is setting up a child to feel bad even when it’s not.

2. Don’t tell your child, “you cannot play until you finish your homework”

Again, by putting homework in a category separate from play, you are saying that it cannot be enjoyable.

The importance of play cannot be overstated. So make it count ​2​ .

Tell your child that they can do both (of course, only healthy physical play like basketball or biking, but not watching iPad).

They can decide the order of doing them as long as they do both by the end of the day.

You’d be surprised – giving a child autonomy over their homework schedule is one of the biggest motivators.

3. Don’t use “no homework” as rewards

I once heard that some teachers would give students with good behavior “no homework tonight” as a reward.

I was horrified.

Homework is for practicing what we’ve learned in school.

It helps us understand and remember better.

It’s not a punishment or torture that you need a “break” to feel better.

Don’t give your child the impression that homework is something you want to get away from.

4. Do not nag, bribe or force

Do not nag and do not force your kid to do homework, whether through rewards or punishment.

“But then, how to make kids do homework?” parents wonder.

Don’t make your child do homework. Period.

Forcing or bribing will only backfire and reduce your child’s intrinsic motivation ​3​ .

The motivation to do homework needs to come from within the child themselves.

5. Let your child face the natural consequences

“But what to do when my child refuses to do homework?” many frustrated parents ask.

When your child refuses to do school work, let them… after you explain why doing homework is important for learning and what may happen in school if they don’t.

Walk them through the natural consequences for not doing homework – they won’t retain the information well and they will need to accept whatever natural consequences in school.

They will have to explain to the teacher why the homework was not done and they may lose some recess time, etc (but first confirm that the school doesn’t use corporal or other types of cruel punishment).

Wait… What?!

You think I should let my child fail?

Well, not doing homework in lower grades is not the end of your child’s academic career.

Think about this, you cannot force or bribe your child through college.

Help them understand the purpose of learning and doing homework now .

You’re helping them make the right decision by letting them understand and face the natural consequences sooner rather than later.

6. Do homework with your child

Don’t tell your kid that homework is important, show them through your action.

Do the homework with them.

You are telling your child you value this so much that you are willing to take the time to do it together. Besides, parental involvement is associated with better school performance ​4​ .

7. Make doing homework fun and positive

There are many ways to make homework for kids fun.

Let’s take a look at two methods I’ve used and the results.

You can try them or invent your own.

Method 1: Use doing homework as a “reward” (younger kids like kindergarteners)

Wait, you said that using rewards wasn’t good a moment ago.

Now you say, “use homework as a reward”?

Well, I said rewards were bad because you would be implying the activity you’re trying to motivate your child to do was not as good as the reward.

But here, I am using homework as a reward.

I am signaling to my child that doing homework is so good that she needs to “earn it”.

How to earn it?

You can try different things.

We used “If you behave, you can do homework with me. If you don’t behave, you can’t do homework.”

We started at preschool and it worked very well.

Parents who have tried this report good results in motivating their children to do homework, too.

But some of them have concerns…

Some parents are uncomfortable with this idea because it feels manipulative.

That’s because these parents do not believe in the idea that homework can be fun.

So they feel like they’re lying to the child.

But I genuinely like homework! (Yes, I’m officially a nerd)

So I have no problem helping my child learn to love homework like me.

If you are not convinced yourself, you may not want to try this method.

Or if your child is older and already hates homework, it won’t work.

However, although I don’t agree with using manipulative measures in general, I don’t see this particular one harmful to children even if the parents do not like homework themselves.

Method 2: Turn doing homework into a game and a bonding activity

When my daughter was in preschool, I bought colorful homework books and we did them together.

Sometimes we took turns – she did one problem and I did the next and so on.

Sometimes we raced to see who would finish the page faster.

Sometimes I did them wrong intentionally so that my daughter could point out the wrong answers.

It was actually very empowering and satisfying for her to be able to catch Mom’s mistakes!

We celebrated when we both finished or got the right answers.

It was a lot of fun and my kid enjoyed doing that so much.

By the time she started kindergarten, she already loved homework.

In kindergarten, I couldn’t do her homework because, well, that’s her homework.

So I bought homework books that were similar to the ones she brought from school. Then, I did problems alongside her as she did hers.

We still raced, celebrated, and had fun doing it.

The result?

At the beginning of her kindergarten year, my daughter was given two homework books to take home.

The teacher would assign homework from the books every week.

They were supposed to be used for the entire school year.

But my kindergartener liked doing homework so much that she finished it all in one month!

No yelling, screaming, threatening, or crying is required.

Final Word On Motivating Your Kid To Do Homework

Getting your kid to do homework is only the first step in building a good learning habit.

Finishing homework or getting good grades is not the purpose of going to school.

Instill the love of learning in your child early on and your child will benefit for life.

• 1. et al. xpected duration of education for all students: Countries Compared. NationMaster. https://www.nationmaster.com/country-info/stats/Education/Expected-duration-of-education-for-all-students
• 2. Ginsburg KR. The Importance of Play in Promoting Healthy Child Development and Maintaining Strong Parent-Child Bonds. PEDIATRICS . Published online January 1, 2007:182-191. doi: 10.1542/peds.2006-2697
• 3. Lepper MR, Greene D. Turning play into work: Effects of adult surveillance and extrinsic rewards on children’s intrinsic motivation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology . Published online 1975:479-486. doi: 10.1037/h0076484
• 4. Nye C, Turner H, Schwartz J. Approaches to Parent Involvement for Improving the Academic Performance of Elementary School Age Children. Campbell Systematic Reviews . Published online 2006:1-49. doi: 10.4073/csr.2006.4

• Grades 6-12
• School Leaders

100 Last-Day-of-School Activities Your Students Will Love!

35 Unique Fifth Grade Art Projects To Tap Into Kids’ Creativity

Inside every kid lies the heart of an artist.

Fifth grade art students are starting to master more advanced skills and techniques, and the work they create is really something to be proud of. These project ideas will expose them to new artists and concepts and help them find the creative artist within!

1. Illustrate your name

This is a perfect project to kick off the school year. Kids illustrate their names with items that fit their style and personality. It will help you get to know them and assess their art skills at the same time.

Learn more: Fifth Grade Name Illustrations

2. Take inspiration from Andy Warhol

Warhol’s pop art is so much fun to explore and emulate. Your fifth grade art students can pick any object they like for this colorful activity.

Learn more: Andy Warhol–Inspired Pop Art

3. Craft LEGO minifig portraits

We all know kids (and adults!) love LEGO. That’s what makes these portraits so cool! Kids draw themselves as minifigs, starting with basic shapes and adding details as they go.

Learn more: LEGO Self-Portraits

4. Design Jasper Johns numbers

This is one of those activities with such impressive results that you’ll be amazed it can be done by fifth grade art students! Take a look at Jasper Johns’ number paintings, then use stencils and rulers to create your own incredible designs.

Learn more: Jasper Johns Number Project

5. Hang 3D color wheels

The color wheel is a basic art concept your students have probably mastered by now, so take things a step further by crafting 3D color wheel spheres instead. This is an easy project that requires nothing more than paper plates, paint, and paper clips.

Learn more: 3D Color Wheels

6. Assemble Picasso relief portraits

Picasso’s mind-bending works stimulate students to look at the world in a whole new way. This cardboard relief portrait is all about deconstructing and reassembling to find a new perspective.

Learn more: Picasso Relief Portraits

7. Create pretty paper lanterns

Hokusai’s woodblock prints are the inspiration for these paper lanterns. Use watercolors to create soft images, then fold the paper into lanterns to hang from the ceiling.

Learn more: 5th Grade Asian Lanterns

8. Sketch 3D cone drawings

It may look complicated, but this fifth grade art idea starts with basic concentric curved lines that any student can draw. The magic comes when you fill in with Sharpies, then shade with colored pencils.

Learn more: 3D Paper Cone Drawings

9. Illustrate onomatopoeia words

Calling all comic book lovers! Students will get a real kick out of illustrating action words inspired by Roy Lichtenstein.

Learn more: Roy Lichtenstein Pop Art Words

10. Fold origami dragon eyes

Teach students to illustrate an eye, then fold a simple origami shape and add dragon scales for a paper craft that’s like no other.

Learn more: Origami Dragon Eyes

11. Fashion clay coils

The coiling method of ceramics is really accessible for everyone. Though it’s often used to make pots, we love how it works for these colorful coil sculptures too.

Learn more: Clay Coil Design

12. Piece together positive-negative collages

Explore the concepts of positive and negative space with this cool paper craft. Kids will have to be very careful as they cut so their reflections will be exact.

Learn more: Positive-Negative Collages

13. Paint snowy pastel mountains

The watercolor resist method is an eternal art room favorite. It’s terrific for creating a snowy winter scene with dreamy watercolors and stark bare trees.

Learn more: Fifth Grade Snowy Mountains

14. Draw Zentangle initials

Zentangles have become popular in recent years as a way to relax and de-stress. Teach students how they work, building designs around the negative space of their initial.

Learn more: Zentangle Initials

15. Create 3D paper name sculptures

This sculpture project requires your fifth grade art students to tap into their engineering skills too. They’ll have to figure out how to balance their letters in a way that’s pleasing to the eye but also stable enough to stay in place.

Learn more: 3D Name Sculptures

16. Parody American Gothic

Grant Wood’s  American Gothic is one of those iconic paintings everyone knows. That’s what makes this parody project a real hoot! Kids re-create the painting with a new pair of main characters, showing that art definitely has room for humor.

Learn more: Grant Wood Parodies

17. Construct mixed-media bird nests

There are so many details in these cool bird nests that you’ll just want to stare at them for hours. Start with a painting, then add 3D elements like twigs and clay bird eggs.

Learn more: Mixed-Media Birds Nests

18. Try direct drawing with Jim Dine paintbrushes

This pop art project starts with a directed drawing lesson, as kids learn to create the various paintbrushes. Then they add color and paint speckles to bring the piece to life.

Learn more: Jim Dine–Inspired Paintbrushes

19. Study form and paint lighthouses

Review terms like horizon and background with these soft lighthouse landscapes. Use white crayon on black construction paper to add depth to the lighthouse itself.

Learn more: Fifth Grade Lighthouses

20. Shade spheres to make planets

Chalk pastels are wonderful for helping students work on blending and shading. Use photographs of planets to inspire their work.

Learn more: Oil Pastel Planets

21. Blend oil pastels into sunflowers

Here’s another awesome blending activity, this time with oil pastels. Kids can draw sunflowers with true-to-life colors or use their imaginations to create any color scheme they like.

Learn more: Wilting Colorful Sunflowers

22. Layer a window scene

Build this piece from the background up, layering window frame and sill over the landscape and finishing with a cat enjoying the view.

Learn more: Layered Art

23. Weave paste-paper patterns

Start by mixing paint and paste to create a thick mixture to spread on paper. Then create patterns with your fingers, a fork, or any other object. Finish by cutting one page into strips and weaving it into the other.

Learn more: Paste-Paper Masterpieces

24. Explore one subject in three styles

Combine multiple art styles in one awesome project. In the center, students draw their subject realistically. On either side, they draw the same object in abstract and non-objective forms.

Learn more: Three Styles of Art

25. Sculpt Georgia O’Keeffe flowers

Georgia O’Keeffe’s huge brilliant flower paintings seem to practically leap off the page, so they’re ideal as inspiration for this fun clay project.

Learn more: Georgia O’Keeffe Clay Flowers

26. Use a grid to help you draw

For kids who feel overwhelmed by drawing, try the grid method. Break a drawing into grid sections, copying each section one at a time. It makes a big project seem much more manageable.

Learn more: Grid Drawing

27. Write “All About Me” squash books

This is part fifth grade art project, part writing project. Kids fold paper using a bookmaking technique called “squash books,” then write and illustrate the sections to tell all about themselves.

Learn more: Foldable Squash Books

28. Reflect beautiful banyan trees

Banyan trees are works of art in themselves, so they’re sure to inspire your students to create beautiful pieces. They can show the trailing roots reflected in water or imagine them underground.

Learn more: Beautiful Banyan Trees

29. Color graffiti break dancers

Keith Haring’s vivid graffiti style is instantly appealing to kids, so they’ll enjoy creating their own breakdancing scenes. All you really need is paper and markers for this quick project.

Learn more: Keith Haring Art Project

30. Dot Kusama–style pumpkins

Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama made incredible art using only dots of different sizes. Challenge your students to do the same with these clever pumpkin prints mounted on stencil-rolled backgrounds.

Learn more: Kusama Dot Pumpkins

31. Illustrate an Elements of Art poster

Elements of art are stylistic features that are included within an art piece to help the artist communicate. This creative project demonstrates all seven.

Learn more: Danielle Frid via YouTube

32. Whirl up some spin art for your walls

Borrow a supply of salad spinners, add paint, and voilà! Super-cool, colorful art for your walls.

Learn more: Spin Art for Your Walls

33. Fold up an origami squirrel sculpture

Although there are many steps, each fold is clearly illustrated with this easy-to-follow tutorial.

Learn more: Origami Squirrel

34. Get abstract with ink blot painting

It’s amazing what beautiful images come from a simple fold of the paper.

Learn more: Ink Blot Painting

35. Freehand-doodle a few houses

Inspired by the folk art of Jeanette Carlstrom , these doodle houses are fueled by your students’ creative juices.

Learn more: Doodle Houses

Now that you’ve sparked their creativity, keep things going with these Fifth Grade Creative Writing Prompts .

Plus,  sign up for our newsletters to get all the latest teaching tips and ideas straight to your inbox..

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