funny wedding speech from groom

50 Funny Groom Speech Jokes to Win Over Wedding Guests

Updated on: August 28, 2023

Jessica Amlee

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The groom speech: that time-honored tradition where the groom grabs a microphone, clears his throat nervously, and tries not to humiliate himself in front of family, friends, and that one weird uncle everyone warned him about. It’s the verbal equivalent of a high-wire act. Too sappy, and you’ll hear groans. Too short, and people will think you didn’t even try. This is not just another toast; it’s the emotional climax of the wedding reception. If movies have taught us anything, it’s that a groom’s speech should be written by an Oscar-winning screenwriter, delivered like Denzel, and revered like the halftime pep talk in every sports movie ever.

That’s where Groom Speech Jokes come in! Because let’s be honest, weddings can be long affairs. By the time you stand up to speak, folks have been through appetizers, entrées, and maybe even a slide show set to a Kenny G soundtrack. People need a pick-me-up. And nothing wakes up a room faster than a well-timed joke. These groom speech jokes include everyone – from you and your bride’s sisters, brother, and parents to the rest of the lot including the best man and the bridesmaids.

Humor adds sparkle to your words and keeps the audience on their toes. You don’t want your love story to sound like a quarterly report on dishwasher sales, do you? So, toss in a joke or three. Make ’em laugh. Trust us, it’s the best way to ensure that your wedding day will be remembered for all the right reasons—and not because Uncle Bob dozed off and snored through your declarations of eternal love.

Best Groom Jokes for Speech

Add these one-liners and puns in your groom speech to woo your wedding guest:

• I remember the first time I met [Father of the Bride’s Name], he took me aside and gave me some advice. He said, ‘Son, marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade.’ Don’t worry, sir, I got the message—loud and clear!”
• Let’s give it up for our ushers! Those are the guys you saw on your way in, showing you to your seats—kind of like the flight attendants of the wedding world, but without the peanuts and tiny cans of soda.
• The first time I ever set eyes on the [Bride’s Name], I was awestruck by her looks – to me she was ‘drop dead gorgeous’, I said to her ‘you’re gorgeous’, she said ‘drop dead!’
• I learned very early on just how close [Bride’s Name] and her mother are. During one of our first dates, she told me to hold on because she had to call her mom. I thought she was joking. Three hours later, they’re still talking, and I’ve memorized the entire menu of the restaurant. Thank you, [Mother of the Bride’s Name], for finally hanging up so I could learn if I was getting a second date!”
• [Bride’s Name] says she loves me more every day. I told her that at this rate, she’ll soon reach a point where she can’t stand to be without me for even a second. She said she’s already there but will give me five minutes today to talk to my buddies.
• I want to thank my parents, who have been married for [number of years] years and have set an incredible example. I asked them for their secret to a long-lasting marriage. They handed me earplugs and a blindfold. Love you, Mom and Dad.
• [Younger Brother’s Name] has been so welcoming since day one. He gave me the most heartfelt advice on joining the family. He said, ‘Bro, you’re cool and all, but if you make my sister cry, I have a black belt in remote control throwing.’ Duly noted, my man, duly noted.
• I want to thank everyone for coming to what I like to call ‘The Sequel.’ You know, sequels are always a bit controversial—some people think they can never be as good as the original, but others think they’re a chance to correct the mistakes of the first one. I’m just glad there’s no option for a reboot!
• They say practice makes perfect, and after last night’s rehearsal dinner, I can confidently say we’ve mastered the art of pretending to know how to cut a wedding cake.
• Now, I want to give a shoutout to my Best Man, [Best Man’s Name]. He’s been my confidant, my wingman, and my therapist. And after tonight, he will also be my debt collector because have you seen the bar tab?
• I know the bridesmaids have put in a lot of effort into looking good today, but I’m here to tell you, ladies, it was all in vain. Nobody could ever outshine my beautiful bride. But hey, second place is still good
• If I’ve learned anything from being with [Bride’s Name], it’s that she’s always right. Even when she’s wrong, she’s ’emotionally right,’ which I’ve learned is a completely different category of being right that men know nothing about.
• Let’s not forget [Older Sister’s Name], the original role model for [Bride’s Name]. She taught her so many important life skills—like how to expertly dodge chores and blame it on the sibling. Thanks to her, I now have a wife who can ‘disappear’ every time the garbage needs taking out.
• To my friends who couldn’t make it, thanks for sending your well wishes and apologies. By the way, your portions of the cake will be mailed to you. Expect a very squished box in 5-7 business days.
• My parents are incredible people. They’ve always been there for me. Literally. They even followed me on my first date with [Bride’s Name]. We thought we were being tailed by the FBI, but it was just Mom and Dad in oversized sunglasses and a baseball cap.
• I have to thank [Younger Sister’s Name] for helping me survive my first ‘Meet the Parents’ dinner. She sent me a text under the table that read: ‘If you want to impress them, mention your 401(k) and pretend you like dad’s jokes.’ Worked like a charm.
• Getting to know [Bride’s Name] meant getting to know [Twin Brother’s Name] too. It’s like studying for two exams at once. The good news is, I think I’ve passed. The bad news is, I still can’t tell their childhood photos apart. I just nod and say, ‘Wow, you both look so cute!’
• They say that bridesmaids are like the GPS of the wedding—always there to point you in the right direction, especially when it comes to avoiding disastrous hairstyle choices and horrific dance moves. Thanks for keeping us all on the right track.
• Dad taught me some valuable lessons about love. For instance, the words ‘Yes, Dear’ are the key to marital bliss. And if you forget your anniversary, the doghouse isn’t as uncomfortable as you’d think.
• I’ve got to say, the wedding feels a little different the second time around. The first time, I was nervous about the little things, like tripping over my vows. This time, I’m just glad I remembered where the church is!

Recommended : Best Man Speech Jokes

• I owe a lot to my Best Man. In fact, if it weren’t for [Best Man’s Name], I might not be standing here today. He’s the one who taught me the secret to a happy relationship: Always have the last word, and make sure that last word is ‘Sorry.’
• [Bride’s Name] is so punctual; she’s never late for anything. She even starts worrying about being late while she’s still early. I think our future is going to be meticulously planned and extremely punctual. Our first child will probably be born saying, ‘Am I late?’
• If the wedding is anything like the rehearsal dinner, we’re in for a good time. The food, the drinks, the awkward speeches—it’s like a family holiday, but with better table settings.
• “Let’s all give it up for [Elder Brother’s Name], the original ‘Gatekeeper.’ I had to answer three riddles and beat him at arm wrestling just to be granted an audience with his sister. Thankfully, he didn’t ask me to climb a tower or slay a dragon—those are in the advanced tests, I hear.
• [Father of the Bride’s Name], you’ve been like a second father to me. Or rather, a financial advisor, mechanic, DIY expert, and occasional golf buddy all rolled into one. So, if I make any mistakes, just remember—you’re partially to blame!
• Some of our dearest friends couldn’t be here tonight, but they sent their love and some truly unforgettable text messages—most of which are better read when not standing next to my new in-laws.
• Ladies and gentlemen, it’s been a very emotional day. Even the cake’s in tiers…!
• [Bride’s Name] is a firm believer in ‘retail therapy.’ And by that, I mean she goes to therapy, finds out it’s my fault, and then goes shopping to feel better.”
• [Younger Sister’s Name] has been practicing for months to catch the bouquet tonight. So, ladies, consider this your fair warning: you’re competing against someone who’s been doing wrist exercises and has studied the aerodynamics of flower-throwing. May the odds be ever in your favor.
• The bridesmaids have been like the secret service agents of this wedding. They’ve guarded [Bride’s Name] from stress, shielded her from bad advice, and screened all her calls. I’m considering hiring you all full-time.
• When we first started dating, [Bride’s Name] told me that communication is key. So now, we have a very open dialogue about how I’m always wrong. It’s quite enlightening.
• I want to thank [Mother of the Bride’s Name] for raising such a wonderful daughter. She taught her everything: how to be kind, how to be thoughtful, and how to be patient. And let’s not forget, how to dissect every single word a man says. I’m pretty sure that when I said ‘I do,’ [Bride’s Name] heard ‘I do… promise to never leave my socks on the floor, take out the trash without being asked, and always, always agree that your mother is right.’
• [Best Man’s Name] is so trustworthy, I even let him plan my bachelor party. Of course, that was before I found out it would involve bungee jumping and a petting zoo. Let’s just say it was a wild ride in more ways than one.
• A big shout-out to [Older Sister’s Name]. She’s the one who’s been vetting me from day one. Our first meeting felt like a job interview. There were background checks, personality quizzes, and a lie detector test—or at least it felt that way. Happy to report, I got the job!
• [Bride’s Name] is great with directions; she can find her way anywhere. Except for the laundry room—somehow, that place remains a mystery to her.
• A big thank you to all the bridesmaids for planning such a memorable bachelorette party for [Bride’s Name]. I wasn’t there, of course, but I did see some interesting props lying around the house. I’m looking forward to the explanation.
• They say that when you marry someone, you marry their family too. Well, if that’s the case, I hit the jackpot twice. I got a beautiful, loving wife and in-laws who are already showing me how to up my BBQ game and Pinterest-worthy home decor. What more could a guy ask for?
• When I asked [Elder Brother’s Name] for his sister’s hand in marriage, he said, ‘Are you sure you can handle her?’ I thought it was a cautionary statement until he handed me a survival kit with earplugs and a bottle of aspirin. So far, so good!
• I asked [Bride’s Name] what her dream destination was for our honeymoon. She said, ‘Anywhere, as long as you’re there.’ I told her that’s sweet because my dream destination is anywhere with free Wi-Fi. We’re still negotiating.
• When [Younger Brother’s Name] found out his sister was getting married, he had only one concern: ‘Does this mean I get her room?’ Well, buddy, you might have to negotiate that with your parents, but if it helps, you can have all my old baseball cards.
• Let’s hear it for [Twin Brother’s Name], the man who knows [Bride’s Name] so well, they literally shared a womb. I’ve been told they even had a secret language as kids. I’ve tried learning it, but it turns out, ‘Don’t mess this up, bro,’ sounds the same in every language.
• I learned very quickly that ‘Do you want to watch a romantic comedy?’ is [Bride’s Name]’s code for ‘We are watching a romantic comedy.’ Now, I not only know who Hugh Grant is, but I also have strong opinions on his best roles.
• You know you’re part of the family when the older sister starts asking you for tech support. [Older Sister’s Name], I promise to keep helping you with your computer problems, as long as you promise to keep telling [Bride’s Name] how amazing her choice in husband is. Deal?!
• [Younger Sister’s Name] told me the quickest way to her sister’s heart was through her stomach. So, I tried cooking dinner for [Bride’s Name] one night. After that culinary disaster, [Younger Sister’s Name] handed me a stack of takeout menus and said, ‘Let’s keep this our little secret.’
• [Bride’s Name] once said that marriage is all about compromise. For instance, she wanted a cat, and I wanted a dog. So we compromised, and now we have a cat.
• I’ll never forget the time [Twin Sister’s Name] and [Bride’s Name] decided to switch places to test if I could tell the difference. I panicked and accidentally said, ‘Wow, honey, you look different today, did you do something new with your hair?’ Never making that mistake again!
• They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. [Bride’s Name] took that literally and first won me over with her amazing ability to order the best thing on any takeout menu. It’s a talent, really.
• [Bride’s Mom’s Name] and [Bride’s Dad’s Name], you’ve raised a wonderful daughter, and for that, I owe you everything. Literally. Have you seen the cost of weddings these days? I think we’ll be paying this off until our golden anniversary!
• I asked [Bride’s Name] what she loved most about me. She said, ‘Your ability to listen.’ I’m not sure what she said after that; I was too busy celebrating the compliment.
• Our ushers have done a great job seating everyone today. And don’t worry, they’ll also be available after the ceremony to help you find your cars. No, seriously, they’ve got maps and everything.

Do you have a funny Groom Speech Joke? Write down your own Groom jokes for speech in the comment section below!

Jessica Amlee, born in 1996 in Laughlin, Nevada, is a delightful humorist and joke writer with a penchant for puns. She studied at Emerson College, earning a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Comedy. Jessica's comedic style combines snappy one-liners and observational humor, making her a rising star in the world of comedy.

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30 Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

Handy one-liners to make the guests lol.

If you've read our post on how to make a great best man speech , you'll know that we recommend starting with a joke , and here, we're sharing 30 foolproof examples of funny opening lines for wedding speeches! The beauty of this list is that it works for any wedding speech, whether you're a groom , bride, best man , bridesmaid , groomsman, bridesman, groomsmaid, father of the bride, father of the groom, mother of the bride, mother of the groom, granny or grandad, or just a close pal with a knack for public speaking!

Boasting everything from eye roll-worthy classics to offbeat gags, our round-up of funny opening lines for wedding speeches is sure to have something to suit your personal style, and many of them can be customised to pack an even bigger punch on the day. Kick off with one of these gems, and you'll not only put the audience at ease, you'll set yourself up for a terrific wedding speech!

Note: [Name] can indicate yourself, the bride/groom, the couple as a whole, or another member of the bridal party!

1. “Gosh, what an emotional day it’s been. Even the cake is in tiers!”

2. “Hi everyone! I’m [Name] and it’s time for me to give the speech I frantically scribbled down 15 minutes ago!”

3. "The couple have requested that I don't share any embarrassing stories... so that's it from me! Thanks for listening!"

4. "[Name], I love you so much, and I really hope you'll feel the same about me after you hear my speech."

5. "I just want to start by congratulating [previous speaker's Name] on their wonderful speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right, I couldn't follow a word of it."

6. "The couple actually had a bit of trouble finding someone to make a speech today. They started by asking their funniest friend, and they said no. Then they asked their most charming friend, and they said no. After that, they asked their best-looking friend and, again, they said no. Then they asked me, and, after already turning them down three times, I couldn't refuse again."

7. "Ladies and gentlemen, today we witnessed a unique event in history - it's the first and presumably last time anyone has trusted me to give a speech!"

8. "[Name] and I share the same sense of humour, so if you don't like my jokes, you can blame them!"

9. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate something truly magical. Something so rare and fortuitous and wonderful that it simply must be celebrated. I am, of course, talking about the open bar/donut wall/photo booth/[Name] wearing a tie ."

10. "Where do I start with [Name]? They're kind, intelligent, gorgeous, charming... [directed at them] sorry, I'm having trouble reading your writing, you'll have to tell me the rest later."

11. "I think we can all agree that it's been a fantastic day. But unfortunately that ends right here with my speech."

12. "Loyal. Kind. Honest. Generous... That's enough about me, I'm here to talk about [Name]!"

13. "I'd like to begin my speech by giving the happy couple some relationship advice, but unfortunately I'm single and spend most of my time trying to coax my cat into little outfits/browsing Doctor Who fan sites/playing Rock Paper Scissors with Alexa."

14. "A few months ago, [Name] called me up and asked, 'What are your feelings on marriage?' I had to tell them that, while I was very flattered, I wasn't ready to settle down just yet."

15. "Can everyone hear me OK? If you can't hear me in the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you're not missing anything."

16. "Hello everyone! I'm [Name]. I'm sure you all know me as (Name's best friend/sister/mum/dad), but if you don't, well done on sneaking into the wedding unnoticed!"

17. "Before I begin, I must explain that, this morning, [Name] asked me to remove anything resembling innuendo from my speech. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to go through it again, but if I come across anything risqué, I'll whip it out immediately."

18. "[Name] knows that I'm a bit nervous about this speech, and they gave me some great advice. They said 'Don't try to be too charming, witty or intellectual... just be yourself!'"

19. "All of us gathered together in this room, we've got something really important in common - none of us have got a clue what I'm going to say next!"

20. "I was told that the secret to a good speech is to start with something that's relevant to everyone in the audience. So here it goes - all of your cars have been stolen."

21. "I want to start by saying that, of all the weddings I've attended over the years, this one is, by far, the most recent."

22. "I'd like to start by congratulating [Name] on their excellent taste... in speakers."

23. "Before we start, can everybody do me a favour and get up off their seats? Now can everyone take one step backward, please? Now can everyone move one step to the right? And now can everyone move one step left? Thank you. Someone told me that the key to giving a good speech was to move people, but I think they must have been having me on, because this is going terribly!"

24. "I'm so happy to be overseeing the only five minutes of today that [bride or groom's Name] didn't plan. Only joking, they went over my speech with me at the bar half an hour ago. [Pulls extra page out of pocket] But I did manage to hide one page!"

25. Guys, before I start, just some housekeeping notes, the venue has asked that you don't stand on any of the chairs and tables for my standing ovation."

26 . I sincerely hope that each day of [Insert names] marriage is better than the the one before, the only thing is that also means they'll look back on today, their wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of their lives.

27. I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. You'll be glad to hear, that last night I slept like a baby. I woke up every two hours, bawling my eyes out.

28. Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom/bride drink alone, could I?

29. Just some last messages here to read out: one from [NAME’S] football team for [PARTNER] " Apologies we couldn’t all be there today, good luck with [NAME], we found him/her to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight ."

30. Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments of silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 250 chickens, and the many, many carnations, roses and wedding coordinators who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.

Loved these opening lines for wedding speeches? We also have a handy checklist of people you need to remember to thank !

Image credits

Marc lawson photography, via one fab day, see more in:.

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110 Inspirational & Funny Wedding Toast Quotes to Make Your Speech a Hit

Rachael Pace inspires with motivational articles on loving partnerships. She encourages making room for love and facing challenges together.

In This Article

As a part of the wedding party, you know it’s your job to plan the bridal shower , show the groom an awesome last night as a bachelor , and give a few words of wisdom.

Everyone loves funny wedding toast quotes, and funny wedding speeches. Excellent wedding toasts have love, romance, and a witty element braided into them. 

What is the purpose of a wedding toast?

Wedding toasts are reserved for the wedding party.

The purpose of a wedding toast is to wish and bless the couple for the new life together. It is a personalised wish meant for the newlyweds. It surely makes the wedding memorable. In the end, the guests raise their glasses and drink for the health, wealth and prosperity. 

What do you say at a wedding toast?

A wedding toast should be personalized and unique. While planning a wedding toast, ensure to follow these steps:

• Congratulate the couple
• Introduce yourself and your relationship with the couple/ bride/ groom
• Tell a story by using examples
• Raise your glass for the toast

Funny wedding toast quotes

The moment you get married, your freedom, sex life, and happiness are over! Or is it? This is the message that most funny wedding jokes have in common. 

If you are looking for best man speech openers or maid of honor speech quotes, consider including some funny marriage quotes. Here are some of the best inspirational and funny wedding toasts examples or funny wedding toasts one liners you can use to make your wedding speech memorable. 

Read our selection of cute and funny wedding toasts or funny lines for maid of honor speech to include in your wedding.

• “Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell
• “Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight” – Phyllis Diller
• “It’s no good pretending that any relationship has a future if your record collections disagree violently or if your favorite films wouldn’t even speak to each other if they met at a party” – Nick Hornby
• “All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” – Charles Schulz
• “Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.”– Henry Kissinger
• “The best way to get most husbands to do something is to suggest that perhaps they’re too old to do it.” – Ann Bancroft
• “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.” –George Burns
• “An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her” – Agatha Christie
• “True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure’ and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part.”– Mindy Kaling
• “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner
• “Love: a temporary insanity curable by marriage.” – Ambrose Bierce
• “There’s only one way to have a happy marriage , and as soon as I learn what it is, I’ll get married again.” – Clint Eastwood
• “A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband.” – Michel de Montaigne
• “Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.” – Johnny Carson
• “May you both live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live.”
• “We are gathered here today to honor something so truly magical, so truly unique and wonderful, that it simply had to be celebrated. I am, of course, talking about the doughnut wall.”

Inspirational wedding quotes

The best funny maid of honor speeches have an element of whimsical and romantic in them. When in search of wedding toast ideas, take a look at some of the inspirational wedding quotes to warm the hearts of the audience. 

 “You don’t need to be on the same wavelength to succeed in marriage. You just need to be able to ride each other’s waves.” —Toni Sciarra Poynter

• “To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you are the world.” – Bill Wilson
• “Love doesn’t make the world go round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” – Elizabeth Barrett Browning
• “Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery
• “True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” – Anonymous
• “But let there be spaces in your togetherness and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.” – Khalil Gibran
• “Let the wife make the husband glad to come home and let him make her sorry to see him leave.” – Martin Luther
• “Marriage must incessantly contend with a monster that devours everything: familiarity.” – Honore de Balzac
• “It is a full-time job being honest one moment at a time, remembering to love, to honor, to respect. It is a practice, a discipline, worthy of every moment.” – Jasmine Guy
• “Every good relationship, especially marriage, is based on respect . If it’s not based on respect, nothing that appears to be goodwill lasts very long.” – Amy Grant
• “When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls. Her husband entrusting his heart to her has an unfailing prize.” —Proverbs 31:10-11
• “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” —1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Wedding quotes on love and life

To make a good impression, you need both funny quotes to start a speech and poetic quotes to wrap it up. Consider adding some quotes on love and marriage into the wedding toast.

• “To keep your marriage brimming with love in the wedding cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.” —Ogden Nash
• “If it is true that there are as many minds as there are heads, then there are as many kinds of love as there are hearts.” – Leo Tolstoy
• “Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved.” – Barbara Johnson
• “Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition.” – Alexander Smith
• “Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature, and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning, and unquenchable.” – Bruce Lee
• “A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other…Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever.” – Dave Matthews
• “To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to love and be loved, that’s everything.” – Themis Tolis
• “We are shaped and fashioned by what we love.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
• “I think one reason for a successful marriage is laughter. I think laughter gets you through the rough moments in a marriage.” – Bob Newhart
• “The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person . You know they’re right if you love to be with them all the time.” – Julia Child
• “ But the key to our marriage is the capacity to give each other a break. And to realize that it’s not how our similarities work together; it’s how our differences work together.” – Michael J. Fox

Good marriage wedding quotes

Funny wedding toast quotes are a great way to start the speech or to end it. Wedding speeches need to be amusing. Also, they need to be motivational and bold. To make an impression include both romantic and funny quotes about marriage.

 “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” – Mignon McLaughlin

• “Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.” – Joyce Brothers
• “Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.” – Amy Bloom
• “To get the full value of joy, you must have someone to divide it with.” – Mark Twain
• “But to sustain a marriage for 50 years, you have to get real a little bit and find someone who is understanding and who you can grow with. My mom always says, ‘Marry the man who loves you a millimeter more.” – Ali Larter
• “It doesn’t matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other.” – Good Will Hunting
• “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with a person, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” – When Harry Met Sally
• “Only one is a wanderer. Two together are always going somewhere.” – Vertigo
• “Equal partnerships are not made in heaven—they are made on earth, one choice at a time, one conversation at a time, one threshold crossing at a time.” ~ Bruce C. Hafen
• “Happy is the man who finds a true friend, and far happier is he who finds that true friend in his wife.” – Franz Schubert
• “Marriage, like everything else in the world, is holy or unholy depending on the purpose the mind ascribes to it.” – Marianne Williamson
• “Don’t marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can’t live without.” – James Dobson
• “When a marriage works, nothing on earth can take its place.” – Helen Gahagan
• “Experts on romance say for a happy marriage, there has to be more than a passionate love . For a lasting union, they insist, there must be a genuine liking for each other. Which, in my book, is a good definition of friendship.” – Marilyn Monroe
• “Marriage is a risk; I think it’s a great and glorious risk, as long as you embark on the adventure in the same spirit.” – Cate Blanchett

Funny marriage quotes

Funny wedding speeches are unforgettable and create great wedding memories if done properly and with moderation. Funny wedding toast quotes can make a real splash, so be careful not to let any negativity spill onto the couple’s big day. Consider adding some of the funny wedding speech quotes listed here. 

• “A man is incomplete until he’s married. After that, he’s finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
• “If love means never having to say you’re sorry, then Marriage means always having to say everything twice.” – Estelle Getty
• “Love is blind — marriage is the eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason
• “A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.” – Anonymous
• “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” – Phyllis Diller
• “A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.” – Terry Pratchett
• “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henny Youngman
• “Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing anyone who comes between them.” – Sydney Smith
• “Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can’t sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can’t sleep with the window open.” – George Bernard Shaw
• “Some people ask the secret of our long marriage . We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music, and dancing. She goes Tuesdays; I go Fridays.” – Henny Youngman
• “Before marriage, many couples are very much like people rushing to catch an airplane; once aboard, they turn into passengers. They just sit there.” – J. Paul Getty
• “Every marriage is a mystery to me, even the one I’m in. So I’m no expert on it.” – Hillary Clinton

Check out this hilarious wedding speech by the brother and take some cues:

Witty wedding quotes

Wedding toasts need some witty wedding quotes to be complete. A short wedding toast could make up for funny wedding toasts, but witty wedding quotes make up for a playful and catchy wedding speech. 

 “Always remember to fight with two words, ‘Yes Dear.’” – Anonymous

• “People are weird. When we find someone with weirdness that is compatible with ours, we team up and call it love.” – Dr. Seuss
• “Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.” – Rita Rudner
• “Love is a present, so open it happily.” – Sepatu Usang
• “A good husband makes a good wife.” – John Florio
• “Whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.” – Ogden Nash
• “If you would be loved, love, and be lovable.” – Benjamin Franklin
• “Any fool can have a trophy wife. It takes a real man to have a trophy marriage.” – Allan K. Chalmers
• “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.” – Socrates
• “I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.” – Lyndon B. Johnson
• “Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.” – Ogden Nash
• “Husbands are like fires – they go out when they’re left unattended.” – Cher
• “An ideal wife is any woman who has an ideal husband.” – Booth Tarkington
• “Remember that creating a successful marriage is like farming: you have to start over again every morning.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
• “Marriage – a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.” – Beverley Nichols
• “Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted the whole day.” —Mickey Rooney

Wedding toast about happiness

To conclude your search for wedding speech quotes, we have selected a list of wedding toast quotes about happiness. Funny wedding toast quotes accompanied by some awesome wedding toasts on happiness will undoubtedly fortify your position as the best man or maid of honor. 

• “Marriage is the most natural state of man and the state in which you will find solid happiness.” – Benjamin Franklin
• “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” – Robert A. Heinlein
• “Marriage is the highest state of friendship. If happy, it lessens our care by dividing them, at the same time that it doubles our pleasures by mutual participation.” – Samuel Richardson
• “The secret to a happy marriage is if you can be at peace with someone within four walls, if you are content because the one you love is near to you, either upstairs or downstairs, or in the same room, and you feel that warmth that you don’t find very often, then that is what love is all about.” – Bruce Forsyth
• “Love one another, and you will be happy; it is as simple and as difficult as that.” – Michael Leunig
• “There is only one happiness in life – to love and be loved.” – George Sand
• “Happiness is only real when shared.” – Jon Krakauer
• “They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for.” – Tom Bodett
• “There is no greater happiness for a man than approaching a door at the end of a day, knowing someone on the other side of that door is waiting for the sound of his footsteps.” – Ronald Reagan
• “Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness, of hatred, of jealousy, and, most easily of all, the gate of fear.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

Wedding toasts with blessings

You care about the bride and groom and wish them well. However, you might be puzzled about how to put those good sentiments into your wedding toast. Take a look at these wedding toast quotes with classical blessings, and we are sure you will find something useful. 

• “May your love be like the misty rain, gentle coming in but flooding the river.” – Traditional African Blessing
• “May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind be always at your back, The sunshine warm upon your face, The rain fall soft upon your fields, And until we meet again, May God hold you in the hollow of His hand.”– Irish blessing.
• “May their joys be as deep as the ocean, And their misfortunes as light as the foam.” – Armenian Blessing
• “Let’s drink to love, which is nothing—unless it’s divided by two.” – Irish blessing
• “Try to reason about love, and you will lose your reason.” – French proverb
• “May your love be modern enough to survive the times but old-fashioned enough to last forever.” – Anonymous
• “When love reigns, the impossible may be attained.” – Indian Proverb
• “No road is long with good company.” – Turkish proverb
• “He who treads the path of love walks a thousand meters as if it were only one.” —Japanese proverb
• “A life without love is like a year without summer.” —Lithuanian proverb
• “Do not measure your marriage by how much love you feel today: measure it by how much love you’ve offered today.” – Glennon Doyle Melton
• “Please make sure your glasses are charged and join me in toasting the new Mr and Mrs [NAME]. Ladies and gentlemen, to the bride and groom!”

When looking to make a funny wedding toast, why not incorporate some personal stories about the bride or groom? This is a great way to give the guests a personal insight into the more hilarious aspects of their courtship.

You can leave the anecdotes about crazy ex-boyfriends and girlfriends out of the equation, but feel free to include any adorable or funny moments you have shared or witnessed with the happy couple .

Here are some funny wedding jokes for speech and stories you can use as funny wedding toast quotes.

• “Did you hear about the two spiders who just got engaged? I hear they met on the web.”
• A therapist has a theory that couples who make love once a day are the happiest. So he tests it at a seminar by asking those assembled, “How many people here make love once a day?” Half the people raise their hands, each of them grinning widely. “Once a week?” A third of the audience members raise their hands, their grins a bit less vibrant. “Once a month?” A few hands tepidly go up. Then he asks, “OK, how about once a year?” One man in the back jumps up and down, jubilantly waving his hands. The therapist is shocked—this disproves his theory. “If you make love only once a year,” he asks, “why are you so happy?” The man yells, “Today’s the day!”
• “Did you hear about the two cell phones who got married? The reception was terrific.”
• “It’s been ten years since the invisible man married the invisible woman. Their kids are nothing to look at either.”
• “Don’t be a slow learner! After his husband forgot the wedding anniversary , his wife tells him: ‘You’d better have something in front of the house, tomorrow, which goes from 0 to 100 in 4 seconds.’ The next day, she finds on the road, a bathroom scale.”
• “Did you hear about the notebook who married a pencil? She finally found Mr. Write.”
• “Marriage is like the army. Everyone complains, but you’d be surprised at the large number that re-enlists.”
• My sister Tina was telling her husband, Kay, about a wonderful program she had watched on TV. The show gave a national award to heroic people who put themselves in grave danger to help out someone they hardly knew. Kay replied, “That sounds a lot like getting married.”
• “Do you know why the King of Hearts married the Queen of Hearts? They were perfectly suited to each other.”

Wrapping it up

You want wedding toasts jokes or wedding toasts to be memorable, flattering, or funny toasts for weddings to make the bride or groom laugh, use these funny wedding toast quotes to add life to your speech, but don’t forget this is a celebration of two people coming together in love, so avoid using any quotes, jokes, or stories that will embarrass or disparage the happy couple. 

Remember, funny wedding toast quotes are only a part of the speech, and they have to be introduced with zest and taste. 

Have a look at the video given below to get an idea of how can you deliver a hilarious wedding speech.

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Rachael Pace is a noted relationship writer associated with Marriage.com. She provides inspiration, support, and empowerment in the form of motivational articles and essays. Rachael enjoys studying the evolution of loving partnerships Read more and is passionate about writing on them. She believes that everyone should make room for love in their lives and encourages couples to work on overcoming their challenges together. Read less

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Funny Wedding Speech Examples

Are you getting ready to give the best man or maid of honor speech at your best friend’s wedding reception? Bravo to you! Humor is frequently a fabulous addition to any toast, and we’d go as far as saying that funny wedding toasts, when done right, can put everybody in a great mood. The key is to remember to choose something relevant to your audience, reasonably age-appropriate, and not too abstract or otherwise over-the-top.

Everyone loves a hilarious wedding toast , and the goal is to engage the audience and to honor the couple. It is not the time to do your stand-up routine or embarrass the newlyweds! You want to make everyone chuckle, not wonder who Captain Inappropriate is.

That’s why we’ve pulled together wedding toast quotes we thought achieved both objectives perfectly.

Check out a few wedding toast quotes and speeches to inspire you and help make your toast memorable below!

FUNNY WEDDING TOAST QUOTES

• “Here’s to the bride – may she share everything with her husband…and that includes the housework.”
• “May you live each day like your last, and live each night like your first.”
• “To the groom: Early in your marriage, you will find it difficult to get the last word in any discussion. With time, though, you will learn how to always get the last two words in every discussion — just make sure the words are ‘Yes dear.’”
• “I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner.
• “By all means, marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”—Socrates.
• “Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.”–Henry Kissinger.
• “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.”–Henry Youngman.
• “I’m so glad we all had a night to rehearse getting drunk for the wedding reception.”
• “I hope you get so many wedding gifts that you don’t realize none are from me.”
• “Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.”
• “Two bits of advice to the new bride: One, tell your new husband that you have to have one night a week out with the girls, and, two, don’t waste that night with the girls.”
• “As you slide down the banister of life, may all the marital splinters be pointed in the right direction.”

FUNNY WEDDING SPEECH EXAMPLES

“For those that don’t know me, [Groom] and I go back all the way to middle school. This means we go back to a time when [Groom} looked more like Chunk from The Goonies and less like the suave man sitting before us tricking [Bride] into thinking that watching him do the Truffle Shuffle in the mirror isn’t in her near future.

[Groom] really is the best friend I could have ever asked for. Growing up, we lived across the street from each other, so he was always really more convenient than anything else. The fact that there was an inground pool in his backyard didn’t hurt the relationship either.

But now we sit here [x] years later, [Groom] has grown into a wonderful man, and he’s sure to be a wonderful husband to you [Bride]. As long as you can get past his infatuation with Teletubbies and the fact that he went as Tinky Wink for Halloween in the fourth grade, I think you’ll make it through anything!”

MAID OF HONOR

“Good evening, everyone! My name is [Maid of Honor]. For those that don’t know me, the bride and I go way back. In fact, we literally go all the way back to the sandbox. We met at the park one afternoon. She was drawn to my homemade mullet. I was drawn to the giant chocolate stain on her shirt. “That’s my kind of lady,” I thought. We’ve been best friends ever since.

[Bride] is the absolute best friend I could have ever asked for. She’s also quite the one-a-kind woman. She can burn a bowl of cereal, and she refuses to use a turn signal. She thought tuna was chicken until second grade because that’s what her mom kept telling her, so she’d eat a tuna salad sandwich on a snowflake roll with the family. I watched her debate it with our teacher. We had a lesson on the ocean and the kinds of fish and mammals that live there.  I’m still impressed to this day because eventually, Mr. Marshall threw up his white flag.

But look at her now. Besides the fact that she had the “Chicken of the Sea” debate far before Jessica Simpson, she’s grown into such a stunning, intelligent, and successful woman. [Groom], you’re a lucky, lucky fellow. She will devote the same love and commitment that I’ve felt from her over the years to you, and that is priceless.

Congratulations [Bride] & [Groom], I wish you infinite years of happiness.”

FUNNIEST SISTER OF THE BRIDE SPEECH EXAMPLE – RAP STYLE

This sister of the bride speech is so clever, funny, inspirational and full of love. It’s a sister of the bride speech rapped to Eminem’s song. You have to watch this hilarious sister of the bride toast.

FATHER OF THE BRIDE GIVES FUNNY SPEECH

The father of the bride speech typically makes wedding guests shed a few tears. But this father presented a toast that was heartfelt and funny. If you are looking for father of the bride speeches check this one out!

A FEW KEY WEDDING TOAST TIPS

• When preparing your wedding toast, think about your relationship with the bride or groom. Find a quiet place to write down your history: how you met, favorite memories, what you’ve been through. You’re pretty much guaranteed to find something sweet or funny to talk about.
• Remember to consider the bride and groom’s actual relationship. While your speech is going to mainly be about one of them, it’s still essential to talk about the new spouse.
• Humor is always a good thing. Making people laugh helps them relax, listen to what you’re saying, and like you! If you can, begin your speech with a funny story or joke, just remember to keep it PG!
• Be sincere! As maid of honor or best man, it can be tempting to “dig” at the happy couple, but keep in mind that this is an extraordinary day for them. While humor is important, it shouldn’t override making the couple feel special. Keep this in mind when choosing stories!
• Preparation is just as necessary as inspiration. Write down the entire thing or make notes, but no matter what, don’t wing the darn thing! That only works in movies–in real life, it can lead to disaster.
• Keep it short and sweet. Three minutes is generally ideal, and definitely don’t go longer than five!
• Say thanks. Thank whoever is hosting the occasion, whether it’s the parents, the couple, or someone else

Most of all, remember to relax and have a great time!

Groom Speech Jokes – Make Them Laugh, Not Groan

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(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI .)

‘Humour’ To Avoid

THE OBVIOUS STUFF – Let’s be honest, we all know, recycled jokes aren’t funny. If you watch the same episode of Friends thirty times in a row, it might start off funny but by the thirtieth time Joey eats a whole turkey, you’re no longer laughing.

Now, considering the average adult attends two weddings a year, by the age of 30 most people have sat through a fair few speeches. This means if you think a joke seems vaguely familiar, chances are your guests will too. And once they recognise just one recycled gag they’ll assume the rest are too.

You want people to laugh at your lines, not groan.

THE BAD STUFF – It’s not just the popularity of internet ‘humour’ that’s a problem, it’s the fact the jokes are really BAD. Some of it’s stupidly sexist but most of it is just cringy-comedy; pun-related, dirty, or just a bit pathetic. AVOID.

THE GENERIC STUFF – At Speechy, we have a rule… if a joke could be inserted into another groom’s speech (with just the names changed), then it doesn’t make the cut. It’s simply too generic which makes it meaningless and a waste of everyone’s time.

Jokes like ‘ I’d like to thank my new father-in-law for his kind words. Best £20 I ever spent!’ Sure. Fine. Nothing too offensive, but it’s a cheap and a blatant cop-out.

You only have to read an article like ’36 Groom Speech Jokes’ to know the sort of lines to avoid.

Step-by-Step Guide To Humour

STEP 1 – TELL THE TRUTH

As Homer Simpson wisely said ‘It’s funny ’cause it’s true’.

So take a step back from trying to be funny. Instead, ask yourself some hard-hitting questions and hunt down the truth…

• What makes you two unique? 
• What are your weird quirks? And what about hers? 
• Do you share any guilty pleasures? 
• Who is better at what in your relationship? 
• What have you taught each other over the years? 
• What frustrates you about each other? 

You get the idea.

Try to be as specific. ‘Loves dancing to cheesy 80s music’ is not as funny as ‘forces everyone to reenact Micheal Jackson’s Thriller whenever there’s a hint of a house party or a sniff of Cava’ .

Or ‘manically tidy’ won’t get as much of a laugh as ‘gives nightly lectures about how to load the dishwasher efficiently… Sometimes with accompanying youtube videos to act as scientific proof of her tidying theories. ‘

So have a think about your partner’s passions, hobbies, and eccentricities. Are they far too into Michael Bublé? Able to burp the alphabet? Do they eat burgers with a knife and fork?

Anything which shows their real character will get a much bigger laugh than an impersonal, internet gag.

STEP 2 – GET STORY HUNTING 

Conduct a forensic search of your relationship and find your best stories.

To be clear, your best stories NEVER relate to the proposal (unless it went wrong). Your best stories are the ones you tell down the pub and everyone laughs.

So scroll back through your social media, hunt down your old Tinder profile, and retrace your romantic steps.

The time they spilt wine down their t-shirt on your first date. The embarrassing poolside incident in Crete. How you accidentally lost your ring in a public toilet on the proposal day.

After you’ve done this, ask family and friends for anything else you might have forgotten, or never even knew. By the end of this, you’ll have enough material for six speeches (but, please, for the audience’s sake, keep it to one).

STEP 3 – CREATE A COMEDY CHARACTER 

Every speech needs a focus for the comedy. Your target could be yourself, your partner or you could set up the notion of a traditional double act (e.g. straight bride vs daft husband).

At straight weddings, some people reckon the bride should never be the comedic focus. They seem to think that as soon as a woman puts on a white dress she can only be told she’s beautiful & wonderful; a Beyonce / Mother Teresa hybrid.

We don’t agree. Just because a woman’s wearing her best knickers and has a ring on her finger doesn’t mean she’s lost her sense of humour.

The key is to keep the humour affectionate and loving. Everyone will love you more for pinpointing the quirks of the bride’s personality.

Of course, you should have a proper heartfelt tribute towards the end of your speech but feel free to have a laugh along the way. It also shows you ‘get her’, which in turn, proves you love her.

Marrying a bloke? Well, he’s fair game for a bit of teasing!

Package Up The Punchlines

Next, it’s time to package up your humour into a proper speech.

Like a good, old-fashioned story, your speech needs to have a beginning, a middle, and an end. It also needs a narrative arc so work out which stories and insights can be threaded together so they don’t seem like a random add-on.

At Speechy, we suggest finding a theme for your speech; a narrative that brings all the anecdotes and observation into a coherent form. This will help you filter out your content. Read our general Groom Speech Advice for a better idea of how it works.

Cut out any stories that take too long to set up and explain. Roughly, you’ll want to be aiming for eight minutes or about 1,300 words, so you don’t have room for waffle.

Once you’ve written the first draft of your speech, the next stage is editing it. As Ernest Hemingway said ‘The first draft of anything is shit’ .

Speeches and jokes are better if they’re punchy.

Practise Those Punchlines

Comedians make standing in front of a bunch of people and being funny look easy, don’t they? But in reality, us normal people know… it’s not . But the good news is even the best stand-ups weren’t always as polished and there are ways of making this as pain-free as possible.

STEP 1 – REHEARSE

First of all, it’s more than acceptable to use notes when delivering your speech but it still pays to know your speech really well.

It helps you understand the flow of your speech and know where to leave a pause for laughter or add a suggestive eyebrow raise.

But how do you get your speech stuck in your head?

Well, simple.

• Start by reading it out loud to anyone who’ll listen: your mum, your mate, your cat. Experts say vocalising something gives us up to 10% better memory retention. 
• So does writing your speech down (old school, in pen).
• And reciting it just before you go to bed. (Though be careful not to let your fiancee hear)

STEP 2 – DELIVER LIKE A PRO

On the big day, the most important thing is to take your time. You know the material. You know the speech is funny. The only thing holding you back is nerves.

So adjust your delivery to slightly slower than normal. This makes you sound naturally more confident and also gives all the jokes room to breathe. By the time you’ve got your first laugh, you’ll naturally relax.

Another quick-win is simply smile. It’s proven to be infectious, so make sure you’re beaming ear to ear before you even stand up. It’s impossible to look someone who’s smiling in the eye without mimicking them. FACT.

From then on it’s all about eye-contact and performing to your crowd. Remember, for the next eight minutes, you’re Jerry Seinfeld, so milk it for all it’s worth. And ENJOY!

The Speechwriting Experts

The Speechy team  are TV-trained scriptwriters/comedians by trade & we’ve helped 1,000s of speakers around the world deliver their dream speech.

Our advice has been quoted everywhere from  The New York Times  to  Grazia  and from Forbes to The Observer . Our founder has also featured on the  BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘ The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’ , published by Little, Brown.

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Crafting the Perfect Groom Speech: Tips, Examples, and Inspiration

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Everyone eagerly awaits the groom’s speech at the wedding, making it crucial. While celebrating love is easy, preparing a speech often isn’t, with grooms often procrastinating out of panic. Whether shy or pressed for time, we’ve got you covered. See our Post for the best groom wedding speeches tips and ideas ever.

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Groom Speech Examples

In the groom’s speech at a wedding, he blends humor and sincerity, thanking everyone, including those absent. Special mentions go to his new father-in-law, bridesmaids, maid of honor, bride’s mother, and his groomsmen, especially the best man. He concludes with a heartfelt toast to his beloved, expressing deep love, gratitude, and commitment.

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials and short enough to hold your attention. Apparently, it’s my job to do all the thank you’s, so on behalf of my lovely new wife and I, the biggest thank-you goes to all of you for coming. The day would not have been the same without you and neither would my bank balance! But on a serious note, it is lovely to see so many of you here. Particularly those of you who have had to travel many miles. Amy and I would like to thank our parents for all the love and support both emotional and financial they have given us. And a special thank-you to Vanessa who is responsible for making our fantastic wedding cake. Sharon, Sue, Vanessa, Ray, Steve We’d also like to thank Darren for his services as the best man today and of course our ushers. You’ve all done a grand job. Darren, Mark, Jon, Jim, Adam That brings me onto our bridesmaids. Thank you all for your help and for being there for Amy through the ups and downs of wedding planning! I’m sure everyone will agree that you all look stunning today. Nina, Laura, Charlotte, Kirsty, Fiona, Lillie, Jordan, and Emily. Finally, I would personally like to thank my lovely wife, Amy, for having me as her husband! I read somewhere that “You don’t marry the person you can live with, you marry the person you cannot live without”. Well, we’ve lived together for five years and I know I’ve married the right person. I’m so glad I can at last call you my wife. Now all that remains is for me to say please enjoy the rest of the day…… and mine’s a foster!

………..Good evening ladies, gentlemen, family, and friends. First of all, I must say a big “thank you” to Colin for his kind words. His speech was so good, he’s going to do mine for me too. As many of you will know, I am of the shy retiring type that likes to keep quiet and keep my opinions to myself, therefore you can understand my nervousness at standing up here in front of all of you making a speech. And as many of you will also know, I’m also a compulsive liar, but I am still nervous, that bit is true. I have been fearful of this bit for weeks, and as you can imagine, this isn’t the first time today I have arisen from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hand. I read while researching wedding speeches that a good speech has a good beginning and a good ending. But the best speech of all is one that keeps these close together. So I will try and keep this as short as possible and will try my best not to do a “Gwinny” with my list of thanks. Firstly I would like to thank any Rangers fans for still being here and not walking out at 4.30 as usual. Pause for cheers But then again, I don’t think we’re friends with any of them anyway. I would like to thank my parents, Ian and Margaret for all the help they have given me over the years, if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t be here now. So, Helen, if it doesn’t work out you know who to blame. I would also like to thank Helen’s parents, Colin and Sandra, for making me feel like the son they never wanted, sorry the son they never had, right from day 2. Day 1 was a bit rough, but hey, they’re over it now……….

………….On a serious note, I’d firstly like to say a big thank you to my new Dad Dave. I’m proud to be his son-in-law and hope I can live up to his expectations, which should be easy, compared to his other son Mick! But let us not take this Father, Son thing too seriously, as I’m not into 10-mile runs before breakfast like you were in the Paras. Both Sharon and I would like to say a huge thank you to everyone for coming here today and sharing this special occasion with us. Especially those who brought expensive presents. Its much appreciated! Thank you to Edwin and Elsa, Margaret and Linda and many others who have traveled a long way to be here. It’s certainly a long way from Brighouse! We hope you all enjoy the day, have fun, relax and be merry…………….

Groom Rehearsal Dinner Speech

Congratulations on your upcoming groom speech at the wedding rehearsal dinner! Here are three tips to help you craft a memorable and meaningful speech:

• Keep it concise: Aim for a short and sweet groom speech. Keep it under five minutes to engage your guests without losing their attention.
• Personalize it: Share personal stories and anecdotes about how you met, what you love about your fiancé, and what makes your relationship special. Don’t be afraid to show your emotions.
• Thank your guests: Express your gratitude to those who supported you during the wedding planning. Thank your guests for being a part of your special day.

Here’s an example of a groom rehearsal dinner speech that incorporates these three tips:

Good evening everyone, and thank you for joining us on this special night. I want to start by thanking our parents, who have been there for us every step of the way. Your love and support mean the world to us. I also want to thank our friends and family who have traveled from near and far to be here with us. We feel incredibly blessed to have you in our lives. As we sit here tonight, I can’t help but reflect on how lucky I am to have found my soulmate in [bride’s name]. I knew from the moment I met her that she was the one for me. Her kindness, intelligence, and beauty continue to amaze me every day. [Optional: insert a personal anecdote here] [Optional: insert a joke or humorous story here] As we prepare to start this new chapter of our lives together, I am filled with gratitude and joy. I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us.

The Great Groom Speech Template

Here’s a groom speech at wedding template that will help you create a winning speech with ease.

• Thank the guests Say a heartfelt thanks to the guests for leaving their busy schedules to honor you on your big day. Many of them sacrificed time, money, work, and even their safety to come all the way because they love you. Say thank you, mean it, and crack a joke. This is also the time to distribute little gifts or wedding favors to the guests.
• Say some words about the bride Gush about the woman of the moment. Let the guests feel your joy at getting married to the love of your life. Talk about what attracted you to her, what she means to you, and reiterate your vows. You may also seal this part of your speech with a kiss and watch her blush.
• Share a memorable story Getting to your wedding day was a long journey and there are stories that bind you. Let the guests know the beautiful way you met, and share sweet memories, funny ones, and romantic events. If both of you have a favorite song, pick a line from it and incorporate it into your speech. Avoid near break-up situations, forgiveness for some errors, or unpleasant situations that happened in your relationship.
• Share your impressions about the day Recount something beautiful about your wedding day. Maybe talk about how the sun shined bright because it knows an angel got married today. Talk about the beautiful reception, cake, or decor. Just incorporate something from the present.
• Say some words about the best man Your best man is arguably one of your strongest support systems throughout wedding planning. Give him some accolades in your speech. Talk about how you met and him being your main man through life. Appreciate him sincerely and even take a friendly jab at him.
• Thank your parents There is no better time to tell everyone how awesome your parents are. Talk about the bride’s parents too because you’re family now. Thank both families for being in your corner and promise to always behave. That will get in a few laughs.
• Close with a toast Finish your speech with a toast to your wife, parents, guests, love, and happiness.

Groom Speech Tips

Many grooms often find themselves confused when trying to write their groom speech at the wedding. In the days leading up to the big event, they might go into a fit of panic because they have no idea what to write. When crafting a groom speech, it’s important to focus on the introduction, body, and conclusion. You want to captivate the guests right from the beginning of your groom speech, keep them engaged throughout, and conclude with a memorable and impactful finish.

The speech tips below are simple, concise and will give answers to all your questions.

• Prepare your mind and calm your nerves for the speech.
• Run speech by your best man to sieve out off liners.
• Make eye contact with everyone.
• Address the audience as a couple. Include your wife.
• Do away with vulgar words or jokes.
• Include the decent but minimal amount of humor.
• Don’t forget to thank your parents and in-laws
• Always throw some compliments the way of your wife and make the core of your speech.
• Dedicate some part of your speech to your wife. She is the main focus.
• Make the last toast go to your wife.
• Make your speech heartfelt and let your personality shine through.

What Not to Say in the Groom Speech

kreativwedding via Instagram

A perfect speech will give you unending applause from everyone. But a bad speech? The disasters are too much to mention. You will have in-laws getting pissed at you, the bridesmaids coming for your head. Your best man gunning to have you quartered and your wife preparing to give you hell.

To avoid the later and all other unforeseen ills that could happen with a badly given speech, here are some don’ts to the rescue.

Don’ts

• Don’t build your speech around anyone else but your wife.
• Don’t include vulgar words or insensitive jokes.
• Don’t take too much time making your speech. 5-10 minutes is enough.
• Don’t forget to introduce your best man and compliments the bridesmaids.
• Don’t forget to make your last toast to the bride.

Groom Wedding Speech Jokes

Adding a touch of humor to your groom speech can lighten the mood and make your speech memorable. Well-placed jokes can bring smiles and laughter, creating a warm and joyful atmosphere. Here are five examples of jokes that are perfect for a groom speech at a wedding:

When I proposed, I got down on one knee and almost didn’t get back up. She said yes, probably out of pity for my lack of athleticism!

They say marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one!

On our first date, I was so nervous that I spilled coffee all over myself. I guess I wanted to make a hot impression!

I’d like to thank my new in-laws for raising such an amazing woman. And for not mentioning my tendency to leave the toilet seat up… yet!

Planning this wedding was a lot like cooking for the first time – a bit messy, a lot of trial and error, and in the end, totally worth it!

Groom Wedding Toast Ideas

To the father of the bride

“Let us toast to my father in law for raising and giving me this beautiful woman. For being a wonderful father to her, although I’m taking over. For accepting me as a son……. “

To the best man

“To my right-hand man for being there all the way. For taking time off work to make all things ready for my big day. For all the sacrifices you made from way back until now. For being my best friend in the real sense and too many more years as friends…..a toast to my best man (insert name)”

Toast To the guests

“A toast to you wonderful people. You are all amazing. Thanks for being here today and sharing in our joy. To many more years of celebration and happiness………. “

To the bride

“Whoever thought this angelic beauty seated here will be mine? Let’s all make a toast to my heartthrob, whose smile lightens my world. A toast to you baby, for all you are, for all you’ll be. To us, to life, to our love, to your happiness, too many blissful years with me, to our future, to forever…………”

Frequently Asked Questions

What should the groom say in his speech.

The groom’s speech typically includes gratitude, compliments to the bride, thanks to guests, and a toast.

What should the groom say at the rehearsal dinner?

The groom at the rehearsal dinner can express appreciation to those involved, share anecdotes, and convey excitement for the upcoming wedding.

How Long Should A Groom’s Speech Be?

A groom’s speech typically lasts around 5 to 10 minutes. It should be long enough to express gratitude, share anecdotes, and convey heartfelt sentiments, but short enough to maintain guests’ interest and keep the overall flow of the wedding reception.

Thank you all again for being here tonight. Let’s raise a glass to love, laughter, and happily ever after! The groom’s speech is one of the most anticipated speeches at a wedding. It doesn’t need such long preparation but could flop if you don’t get the hang of it. Give the best groom speech at wedding ever with the tips, ideas, and templates we’ve curated in this post. Speak from the heart, let your love shine, add some humor and you’re home free.

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How to Write The Perfect Groom’s Speech (With Examples)

Author: Hollie Bond

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How to Write a Grooms Speech

Funny groom's speech ideas
, emotional groom's speech ideas, unusual groom's speech ideas
, famous groom's speech ideas.

No idea where to start when it comes to making a speech on your big day? We’ve compiled all the best tips and inspiration to help you write and deliver the best groom’s speech ever.

The groom’s speech is always a highlight at a wedding. It’s a chance for guests to hear all the romantic and heartfelt sentiments that you, as a newlywed, will be experiencing.

It’s also a feel-good part of the day where you get to acknowledge all your guests and thank individuals who have helped you bring this special day together. Everyone in the ‘audience’ will be friends and family, so put any public speaking nerves aside, as everyone will be willing you on to do your best and if you stumble over your words or well up when you’re talking about your new wife or husband – well, they’ll just love you even more!

We’ve rounded up 40 of the best groom’s speech ideas, with inspiration for funny, emotional, and unusual speeches, plus examples from famous grooms, to help you write your own Oscar-worthy speech.

What should the groom say in his speech?

Good news! The groom’s speech is one of the easiest speeches to write and deliver as it is essentially just one big thank you.

A groom’s speech should focus on thanking everyone who has helped make the wedding day special including the mother and father of the bride (or equivalent), the guests, his own parents, the best man, the bridesmaids, ushers, and anyone else who has contributed to the wedding.

The other main focus of the groom’s speech is to lavish praise and compliments on his new wife (or groom) and to tell them how happy he is to be married. Finally, the groom should raise a toast to his new wife or husband.

How long should a groom’s speech be?

Any speech at a wedding, including the groom’s speech, should be no longer than ten minutes. When written down this is approximately 1500 words, but make sure to time yourself before the big day in case you’re a particularly slow or fast speaker.

Ten minutes is the ideal length to get across everything you need to say, but not so long that your guests get bored and start to fidget. If you’re not a confident speaker you can always just say a few lines lasting a couple of minutes.

Less is definitely more when it comes to speeches. That said, if it’s too short you could sound flippant! Anywhere between five and ten minutes and you’re in safe territory.

1. Don’t be too formal

Unless you’re known for your love of a bit of pomp and circumstance then you don’t suddenly have to become the master of all things etiquette and stuffy speech-making just because it’s your wedding day. Your guests will want to hear you speak in your usual way, and as long as you cover the expected formalities like thanking everyone for coming, both sets of parents, the bridal party, and anyone who went above and beyond to help you with something like making a cake, then you don’t have to worry about anything else.

2. Focus on the start

If you can get guests smiling from the very beginning of the speech, then both you and your guests will feel relaxed and enjoy the rest of it. Have a think about something humorous that specifically relates to your guests or wedding situation rather than an obvious/ heard-100-times-before gag. Perhaps you’re known for your non-stop chatter, so you could open with “I know you’re all thinking you should take a loo break before I start talking, but I promise I’ll keep this as short (as I can!)…”

3. Don’t forget the main purpose of the speech

A romantic and heartfelt ode to the person you’ve just married should be the main focus of this speech. Try to avoid just saying empty words that anyone could say like “she/he is wonderful, beautiful, kind” etc. Think of specific things that your other half has done that makes you proud/ really love them/ that makes them unique. Anecdotes and stories that highlight a personal trait are the best way to do this.

4. Be romantic, not cheesy

Try not to fall into the trap of sounding like a compilation of all the lines you might find inside a cheesy Valentine’s Day card. Instead of “I’m so lucky to have found you” think about “My parents always told me nothing good would come of always being late, but I’m so glad to say I proved them wrong. I missed my train (as usual) that fateful day and the best thing ever came out of it… you.” Or a simple list of all the things that you particularly love about your partner, from the way they constantly fiddle with their hair to the way they talk to your dog like it’s a human.

5. Don’t give out gifts

This isn’t prize-giving at school and giving out weddinggifts to bridesmaids and ushers etc. will just take up valuable partying time. Give your bridal party their gifts in the morning when you’re all getting ready as it’ll be more personal in private.

6. Think about timing

A speech around the 7 – 10 minutes mark is considered the perfect amount of time for a groom’s speech (written down that’s about 1200 – 1400 words). Any less and you’ll sound a bit flippant. Any more and guests will start getting bored.

7. Don’t go into massive amounts of detail

We all know someone that tells a story as intricate and descriptive as a Tolstoy novel and how we automatically glaze over as soon as they start speaking. Don’t be that person. Your guests don’t want War and Peace – they want a nice easy to listen to a speech that doesn’t mentally challenge them, especially once they’re a few drinks down.

8. Find the perfect quote

If you’re not a wordsmith, let someone else more qualified sum up your feelings for you. There are plenty of amazing quotes from authors and famous orators out there and one or two of them may be exactly what you need to succinctly put all your feelings about the day and your partner into one neat sentence. Just make sure to acknowledge the original author!

9. Give your partner a promise

A lovely way to be funny and also heartfelt at the same time is to make a promise or two to your partner in front of your guests. Don’t just repeat your vows here, promise something that is unique to her/him. Perhaps she’s an avid rock climber and you’re more of a couch potato? Promise you’ll learn to love her crazy hobby. Maybe you’re not exactly Heston Blumenthal in the kitchen? Promise you’ll learn to cook your partner more than beans on burnt toast. Perhaps she/he is the world’s greatest Swiftie. Promise you’ll learn the lyrics to all their favourite Taylor Swift songs… you get the idea.

10. Prepare the delivery

The biggest mistake you can make is to write a great speech on paper and then not read it out loud before the big day. You need to practice talking slowly and confidently and leaving little pauses after funny bits (for any of the slower guests to get it!). Also, some written sentences don’t sound great when spoken, so reading out loud will help you to iron out any clunky syntax. Plus, you’ll want to know the speech almost by heart so that you don’t have your head in a piece of paper reading word-for-word on the day. Eye contact with your guests is one of the most important parts of delivering a successful speech.

You don’t have to be the next Michael McIntyre, but giving your guests a giggle and making them smile is the quickest way to make both them and you feel at ease with the speech.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you have to pepper your speech with gags and silly one-liners to make it funny. Instead, just focus on things that are unique to you as a couple or for the audience (perhaps the region you’re from for example) and have a bit of fun at your/ their expense. Be careful not to reference something that only a few members of the audience will understand as that will very quickly alienate your other guests.

Here are ten funny speech ideas to take inspiration from:

Focus on your differences

Comparing your differences can be an easy way to make the guests smile. Are you obsessively tidy and your new partner a bit of a slob perhaps? Can you cook like a pro while they can’t even heat soup without burning the place down? Whatever your differences, exaggerate them and make a joke out of them to get guests giggling.

Tell the crowd something they don’t know

Do you know some funny things about your bride/groom’s past that others in the audience might not? Now’s a good time to reveal that she/he did some hilarious hobbies or geeky things as a child. Perhaps they have a funny secret crush or can do a really odd trick.

Exaggerate your weaknesses

Putting yourself down and acknowledging something everyone knows about you can be a good way to make guests smile. E.g. “Would you believe it? The bride/ groom has finally given up holding out for Ryan Gosling and decided a bald, beer-swilling Insurance Broker from Newcastle is a better option instead.”

Here’s a good example of a funny, self-deprecating groom’s speech:

Make a joke about the wedding itself

“Before I begin, please can we ensure that all the aisles and fire exits are kept clear throughout the reception. There’s a medical team waiting outside the building and I’d like them to have a clear run when my in-laws are presented with the final bill.”

“I’d like to thank Mastercard and Visa, without whom this would never have been possible. My wife and I will be forever in their debt.”

Mother-in-law jokes

These always go down well if you actually get on with her! Reference something unique to your mother in law like her shopping obsession or how long she takes to get ready perhaps. Or keep it classic with: “I’ve been told that this is usually one of the only times in a man’s life when he can be around his wife/husband and mother-in-law and not be interrupted – so hang in there, I’m going to take full advantage.”

“In [in-law’s names], I have found the perfect in-laws. I always cringe when I hear jokes about difficult mothers-in-law because my own experience has been far from that stereotype. [Turn to in-laws and whisper audibly] Did I read that right? Please don’t hurt me…”

Tell a story

If your first date, engagement or the time you asked the in-laws if you could marry their daughter/ son has a funny element to it, go ahead and tell the story. Just remember not to kill the humour with too many details.

Talk about your partner’s quirks

Does your wife/ husband have any weird habits? Divulge a few to the guests but make it romantic by saying how much you love her/him even though they… still get drunk after one glass of wine/ still go to bed with a teddy bear at the age of 33/ always get the words to songs wrong/ always have to be the last person on the dance floor even when the lights come up…

Make the thank yous funny

Instead of a boring list of thank yous, try and inject a bit of fun. For example: “I’d like to thank my mother in law for passing on such wonderful traits to her daughter; her kindness, her humour, though unfortunately, an unwavering support for Arsenal has also slipped down the genetic line.”

Trip the guests up

Everyone expects the first line of the groom’s speech to mention his new wife/ husband. Momentarily confuse them with a sentence like this: “My ex-girlfriend/ boyfriend and I would like to thank you all for coming today” – and then pause while they work it out and laugh.

Use props or videos

If there’s a funny prop or a video that you can show during the speech go for it, plus holding something or giving yourself a break in video form can help stop the nerves.

Leave guests guessing

It’s fine to reference the stag do , but don’t tell a long and boring story about something that happened while you were on it. That’ll only be funny to the stags. It’s best to mention something and leave the end of the story untold as a cliff-hanger so that guests can fill in the blanks with all manner of funny thoughts.

As a groom, you have free reign to get emotional and if you’re not normally an emotional person it will really surprise and delight guests as they will realise just how much the day and marrying your loved one means to you.

You don’t want to get too over the top though and make your guests feel uncomfortable. Keep the really mushy stuff for your bride or groom on your honeymoon and instead focus on the sort of emotional sentiments that will make guests smile.

Here are some ideas for how to make your groom’s speech just the right amount of emotional:

Look guests in the eye

The quickest way to get guests to buy into what you’re saying and to feel the raw emotion of your words is by looking them in the eyes as you deliver each sentence. If you’ve had a difficult time in the run-up to the wedding and are really grateful for the support they’ve all shown, say so while looking sincerely at the guests you really want to show your gratitude to.

Put your heart into the thank yous

If you don’t want to make the thank yous funny or witty, how about making them emotional by not just thanking the person for what they did, but by explaining how much it meant to you.

Mention absent friends

If a member of your family or a friend isn’t at your wedding and is greatly missed then make sure to raise a toast to their memory. You don’t want to be morbid, but a few words about how much the person/ people meant to you both and how much you miss them, followed by inviting all guests to raise a toast to them is a lovely emotional gesture.

Let yourself feel the emotion

If you feel yourself welling up don’t stop the emotion – guests won’t mind if your voice breaks a bit or if you have to take a deep breath. In fact, it just shows how much the words actually mean to you.

Be creative when it comes to describing your partner

If you want to inject emotion into your speech, don’t just say sentences that could describe any bride/ groom. Think specifically about your partner and be poetic when you talk about them and it will be much more sincere than just saying: “My new wide is beautiful” or “My husband is kind”. Here’s a lovely example from a groom’s speech about how to reference your new spouse:

Want to make sure your speech is unforgettable? Make it unusual and unique with some of these stand-out suggestions…

Rap the speech

Got a hidden talent for rapping (or if you don’t it can still be hilarious), then why not attempt to rap the speech instead. You could do part of it normally, before breaking out into a fun rap perhaps.

Sing the speech

Got a good set of pipes on you? How about singing your speech instead? Choose a famous song and then write personalised lyrics to fit. You can make it funny or heartfelt – whatever suits your personality best. Having the words on PowerPoint beside you can help in case some guests miss the words.

Write your speech on blackboards around the room

If the idea of public speaking really is too much for you and threatens to ruin your whole wedding day, why not write it up on blackboards that can be displayed around the venue for guests to read instead. You could even pre-record a video of you reading the speech too. Guests who know and love you will appreciate the effort and know how stressful making a speech in person would be for you.

Speak in a different language

Are you marrying someone who is originally from another country and has another language that you don’t speak? Impress both your new wife or husband and especially their family members who make not speak your language by learning some lines in secret in their language. Starting the speech in English for example before changing seamlessly into French will wow your audience and be very emotional for your new partner.

Get other people to do it for you

Track down important guests who can’t make it to the wedding or some famous people if you can and ask them to say something special that you can record and play as part of the speech.

Borrow the words

If you don’t want to make a traditional groom’s speech, how about performing a poem or reading out the lyrics to a song that means a lot to you as a couple (just don’t make it as awkward as Pam and Mick’s rendition in Gavin & Stacey!)

Write a story

Why not make your groom’s speech sound like the start of a novel or children’s story in a ‘once upon a time’ format, but insert yourself and your new spouse as the main characters. After all, your wedding is part of your love story and you can end your speech with a toast to your happily ever after.

Get your guests involved

Don’t like the idea of all eyes being on you? Surprise your wife/ husband by prepping guests beforehand to each say a sentence. Or you can encourage audience participation by turning your speech into a quiz about you as a couple/ the wedding day.

Perform a musical mash-up

Make it themed

If your bride or groom has a love for something specific, theme your entire speech around it. Take these maids of honour who did a Disney medley as an example:

Tom Fletcher from band McFly did one of the most famous and unusual groom’s speeches of all time. If you can hold a tune why not replicate his speech with your own song…

Nick Jonas went down the heartfelt route for his groom’s speech at his wedding to Priyanka Chopra in 2018 and nailed the thank you to his new mother in law.

Mark Wright from TOWIE gave way to the tears when talking about new wife Michelle Keegan at their wedding: “Not only are you beautiful, but you are one of the most incredible people I have ever met. You truly are sensational in every single way.” Take inspiration from his touching way to be emotional without making everyone feel awkward.

Not a groom’s speech, but you could definitely steal the idea from the best man speech of Danny McKenzie at footballer Jamie Milligan’s wedding – he pretended he had forgotten the speech and then played a video that “showed” him racing through fields and various places James Bond-style to retrieve it…

Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

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Cracking Up the Crowd: The Art of Writing a Hilarious Brother of the Groom Wedding Speech

Are you the brother of the groom and feeling the pressure to deliver a hilarious speech at the wedding? Look no further, as we have the tips and templates to make your speech the talk of the reception!

Writing a funny brother of the groom wedding speech can be a daunting task, but with a little preparation and creativity, it can be a memorable and enjoyable experience for both you and the wedding guests. Here are some tips on how to write a funny brother of the groom wedding speech that will have everyone laughing and smiling.

• Know your audience : Before you start writing your speech, think about who will be in the audience. Will there be children present? Will there be any elderly guests? Knowing your audience will help you tailor your jokes and humor to a suitable level.
• Do your research : Look for inspiration from other speeches and comedians. This will give you an idea of what has been done before and what has worked well. However, make sure to put your own spin on things so that your speech is unique and personal.
• Be yourself : The most important thing is to be true to yourself. Don't try to be someone you're not. Use your own sense of humor and personality to make the speech funny and engaging.
• Personal anecdotes : Share personal anecdotes about your brother and his new spouse. These stories will not only make the speech more personal but also bring a touch of humor to the occasion.
• Keep it clean : Remember that this is a wedding and not a comedy club. Avoid offensive jokes and language, and keep the speech appropriate for all guests.
• Practice makes perfect : Rehearse your speech as many times as possible before the big day. This will help you feel more comfortable and confident when it comes time to deliver the speech.
• Have fun : Finally, remember to have fun with it! Weddings are a joyous occasion, and your speech should reflect that. So, relax and enjoy yourself, and your audience will too.

With these tips in mind, you'll be well on your way to writing a funny and memorable brother of the groom wedding speech that will have the whole room laughing and smiling. Good luck!

Here are 10 templates that you can use for your brother of the groom wedding speech:

Brother of the Groom Template #1

Good evening everyone,

I'm [Your Name], the proud brother of the groom. On behalf of my family, I would like to extend our sincerest gratitude for joining us today to celebrate the union of [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name].

[Groom's Name] and I have been brothers for [number of years/lifetime] and I have been fortunate enough to witness firsthand the love and affection he has for [Bride's Name]. Their love story is a testament to the power of fate and the beauty of two people finding each other.

As [Groom's Name]'s brother, I have many fond memories of us growing up together, and I [insert personal story or anecdote about the groom]. It just goes to show how much [Groom's Name] has grown and matured into the wonderful man he is today.

[Bride's Name], you have brought so much joy and happiness into [Groom's Name]'s life, and for that, we are forever grateful. You complement each other so well and I have no doubt that you will have a long and happy marriage filled with love, laughter, and adventure.

To the newlyweds, [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name], I want to raise a toast to your future together. May your love continue to grow stronger each day, and may you always be each other's rock in times of need.

Brother of the Groom Template #2

Good evening everyone.

I am [Your Name], the proud brother of the groom [Groom’s Name]. And let me tell you, [Groom’s Name] has always been [insert funny childhood memory or anecdote].

But, [insert bride’s name], you have brought out the best in him. I have never seen [Groom’s Name] as happy as he is now that he is married to you.

[Insert personal story about how the couple met or their journey together].

[Groom’s Name], I couldn't be more proud to call you my brother and to welcome [Bride’s Name] into our family. You two are truly [insert heartfelt statement].

And [insert bride’s name], you have [insert specific quality or trait that you admire about the bride]. I can tell you, [Groom’s Name] is one lucky man to have you by his side.

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. To [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name], may your love continue to grow stronger every day and may you always make each other laugh, [insert humorous statement].

Brother of the Groom Template #3

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Good evening everyone, and a very special congratulations to the beautiful couple of [Groom's name] and [Bride's name]. It is truly an honor to be standing here as [Groom's name]'s brother, sharing some thoughts and memories on this special day.

[Insert personal story about growing up with the groom, or a funny anecdote that showcases the groom's personality].

But in all seriousness, I have known [Groom's name] for [number of years] now and I have seen him grow and mature into the amazing man he is today. And I have to say, [Bride's name], you are one lucky woman to have captured his heart.

[Insert personal story about the groom and bride's relationship, or a touching moment you witnessed between them].

You two truly complement each other and bring out the best in one another. I have no doubt that you will have a lifetime of love, laughter, and happiness together.

[Insert a joke or humorous comment to lighten the mood].

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. To [Groom's name] and [Bride's name], may your love continue to blossom and bring joy to those around you.

Brother of the Groom Template #4

Ladies and Gentlemen, friends and family,

Today we come together to celebrate the love and commitment of my brother [Groom's Name] and his beautiful bride [Bride's Name]. As [Groom's Name]'s brother, I feel incredibly blessed and honored to stand here today and speak about their love story.

[Insert personal story about the groom and bride, how they met, how their relationship developed, and how they complement each other.]

Their love is a testament to the idea that true love can conquer all, and that together, we can overcome any obstacle. [Insert personal story about the groom's growth and how the bride has been a positive influence in his life.]

As I look out at this sea of smiling faces, I am reminded of the deep love and friendship that we all share, and of the joy that comes from sharing this special day with the people we care about most.

And so, to [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name], I offer my heartfelt congratulations, my unwavering support, and my deepest wishes for a lifetime of love and happiness. May your marriage be filled with love, laughter, and endless adventures.

And to all of you, I say thank you for being here to celebrate this momentous occasion with my brother and his bride. I am honored to share this day with each and every one of you.

Cheers to [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name]! May your love story be as inspiring and beautiful as the two of you are.

Brother of the Groom Template #5

Ladies and Gentlemen, friends and family, I'm honored to stand here today as the brother of the groom. And let me tell you, my brother is one lucky man to have found someone as amazing as [bride's name].

[Insert personal story about the groom]

But seriously, [groom's name] has always been there for me, through thick and thin. And now, he's found someone who can handle all his [insert humorous quirk about groom].

[Insert personal story about the bride and groom's relationship]

And let me tell you, when [groom's name] told me he was getting married, I was like "Finally! It's about time." But then he told me [bride's name] was the one and I was like "Oh, she's gonna be the one putting up with all this?" [gesture towards groom].

[Insert personal story or joke about the couple's relationship]

But in all seriousness, [bride's name], you are the perfect match for my brother. And [groom's name], you've found someone who truly loves and understands you.

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow and flourish for many years to come. Cheers!

Brother of the Groom Template #6

I stand before you today as the proud brother of the groom. And let me tell you, it takes a lot of balls to get up here and speak in front of so many people. But I'm no stranger to speaking my mind, so here we go.

First of all, I want to start by congratulating [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name] on their wedding day. I never thought I'd see the day when [Groom's Name] would settle down, but I couldn't be happier for the two of you.

Now, some of you may know me as [Your Name], the trouble-making little brother of [Groom's Name]. But today, I'm here to share some personal stories and give a heartfelt speech about my big brother.

Growing up, [Groom's Name] always had a way of [Insert personal story here]. He was always the life of the party and had a heart of gold. He's always been there for me, even when I didn't deserve it, and I'll always be grateful for that.

[Insert another personal story here]. That's the kind of person [Groom's Name] is, always putting others before himself. And now, he's found the love of his life in [Bride's Name].

[Bride's Name], you may not know this, but you've tamed the wild beast that is [Groom's Name]. I couldn't be happier for the two of you and the life you're going to build together.

So, let's raise a glass to the newlyweds. [Groom's Name] and [Bride's Name], may your love continue to grow and flourish for many years to come.

Brother of the Groom Template #7

Ladies and Gentlemen, can I get a round of applause for the beautiful bride and groom! (pause for applause)

Wow, what a day it is! I stand here today as the proud brother of the groom and let me tell you, I’m feeling all the emotions. Happy tears, nostalgic tears, and of course, tears of joy. (pause)

Let me start off by saying, [insert groom’s name], I am so proud of the man you have become. From the days of [insert funny childhood story], to [insert accomplishments], you have always been a source of inspiration and laughter in my life. (pause)

And [insert bride’s name], it’s been a pleasure getting to know you. Your love and support for [groom’s name] is truly inspiring. I’m so grateful to have you as a new addition to our family. (pause)

Now, to the happy couple. You both are a match made in heaven. Your love for each other is evident in every little thing you do. And let me tell you, I’ve seen some stuff.

[Insert personal story about the couple]. (pause)

I know that you both will face challenges in the future, but I have no doubt in my mind that you’ll tackle them with love, laughter and of course, some humor.

So, here’s to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow and flourish in the years to come. And may you always find joy in the little things in life. (pause)

Let’s raise a glass to the newlyweds. To [groom’s name] and [bride’s name]. Cheers!

Brother of the Groom Template #8

I stand before you today as the proud brother of the groom. It's an honor to be here, sharing this special day with all of you.

Now, I have a few words to say, in the style of the great George Carlin. So, buckle up and brace yourselves, because this is going to be a wild ride.

[insert personal story about the groom and bride]

[insert personal story about the groom growing up]

[insert personal story about the groom and brother bond]

But seriously folks, this day is all about [groom's name] and [bride's name]. It's a testament to the love they share and the life they're building together.

[groom's name], you've always been a constant source of laughter and inspiration to me. I couldn't be more proud of the person you've become and the love you've found in [bride's name].

[bride's name], you've brought so much joy into [groom's name]'s life, and into all of our lives. I have no doubt that together, you two will conquer the world.

So, let's raise a glass to the happy couple. May your love continue to grow, and may your lives be filled with laughter, joy, and adventure.

Brother of the Groom Template #9

Good evening and welcome to [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name]’s wedding celebration!

I am [Your Name], the proud brother of the groom. And let me tell you, it feels [insert emotion] to be standing here in front of all of you, to celebrate this wonderful union.

[Groom’s Name] and I have been [insert relationship history] since [insert time]. And let me tell you, he has been [insert personal story about the groom].

But today, as he marries [Bride’s Name], he’s not just gaining a beautiful wife, he’s gaining a [insert personal story about the bride]. And trust me, she’s [insert personal opinion about the bride].

I know that [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name] will make an amazing [insert personal opinion about their future together]. And I can’t wait to see all the [insert personal prediction about their future].

So let’s raise a glass to the newlyweds. To [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name]. May your [insert personal wish for the couple].

Brother of the Groom Template #10

Good evening everyone!

I am [Name], the proud brother of the groom [Groom's Name].

First of all, let me just say that I never thought I would see this day. [Groom's Name] used to be [insert a funny childhood memory about the groom]. But look at him now, all grown up and getting hitched to the love of his life [Bride's Name].

[Insert a personal story about the groom and bride that highlights their love for each other].

[Groom's Name], my brother, has always been [insert a positive quality about the groom]. And [Bride's Name], you are [insert a compliment about the bride]. Together, you two are a match made in heaven.

Now, I know [Groom's Name] can be a little [insert a funny quirk about the groom]. But trust me, [Bride's Name] knows how to handle him. [Insert a story about the bride and groom that showcases their teamwork].

[Groom's Name], [Bride's Name], I am honored to stand here as your brother and friend. I am so happy for both of you and I wish you a lifetime of love, laughter, and happiness.

Cheers to the happy couple!

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The Ultimate Guide to Groom Wedding Speeches: 25+ Examples,Jokes and quotes for Inspiration

Of all the speeches given at a wedding, the groom's speech is arguably the most anticipated. It's a chance for the groom to express his love and gratitude to his new spouse, as well as thank those who made the day possible. But crafting a memorable groom wedding speech can be a daunting task. That's why we've created this complete guide to help you through the process. In this post, we'll provide you with expert tips, ideas, and real-life examples to inspire your own speech. Whether you're a seasoned public speaker or this is your first time addressing a crowd, this guide will help you deliver a heartfelt and memorable groom wedding speech. So, let's get started!

Preparing for the Groom Wedding Speech

Structure of a groom wedding speech, dos and don'ts of a groom wedding speech, best examples of groom wedding speech, groom speech jokes, groom speech quotes.

Preparing for a groom wedding speech involves three key steps: brainstorming, writing the speech, and practicing the speech.

• Brainstorming. The first step is to brainstorm some ideas. Think about what you want to say and how you want to say it. Consider your relationship with your bride, your family and friends, and the wedding day itself. Jot down some notes and ideas that come to mind.
• Writing the Speech. Once you have some ideas, it's time to write the speech. Begin by creating an outline that includes the key points you want to cover. Use the outline to structure your speech and ensure that you cover everything you want to say. Remember to keep it concise, heartfelt, and engaging.
• Practicing the Speech. The final step is to practice the speech. Practice in front of a mirror, or better yet, in front of a trusted friend or family member. This will help you become more comfortable and confident with the speech. Also, pay attention to your timing and delivery. Practice speaking slowly and clearly, and make sure your speech doesn't drag on too long.

Now let's take a closer look at the structure of a groom wedding speech. Here are the key elements that you should include in your speech:

• Opening Lines.  Start with a warm welcome to all the guests and thank them for joining you on this special day. This will set the tone for your speech and make the guests feel appreciated.
• Thanking the Guests.  Next, express your gratitude to the guests for being a part of your wedding day. This can be a simple but heartfelt thank you for their presence and support.
• Thanking the Family.  Thank your family members for their love and support. This is a good opportunity to acknowledge your parents and any siblings or other family members who played a significant role in your life.
• Acknowledging the Bride.  Acknowledge your new bride and express your love and appreciation for her. This is the most important part of your speech and should be the main focus. Share a personal story or a special memory that you have shared together. This will show the guests the depth of your love and affection for your bride.
• Sharing Personal Stories.  Share some personal stories about your relationship with your bride. This can be funny or touching, but make sure it is appropriate for the occasion. This will help to make your speech more memorable and engaging for the guests.
• Expressing Gratitude.  Express gratitude to anyone who played a role in making the wedding day special. This can include the wedding planner, caterer, florist, or anyone else who helped to make the day a success.
• Closing Lines.  Finally, close your speech by thanking the guests once again and expressing your excitement for the future. This is a good opportunity to toast to your new life together as a married couple.

There are some dos and don'ts that you should keep in mind when preparing for your groom wedding speech. Here are some key points to consider:

• Be sincere and speak from the heart.
• Make eye contact with the guests to help connect with them.
• Use appropriate humor to make your speech engaging and enjoyable.
• Keep your speech concise and to the point.
• Drink too much before your speech as it may lead to slurred words or inappropriate behavior.
• Use offensive language or jokes that may offend some guests.
• Share embarrassing stories that may embarrass your bride or anyone else.
• Make your speech too long as guests may lose interest.

1. "Dear friends and family, it is an honor to stand before you today as the luckiest man in the world. I want to take a moment to thank all of you for being here to celebrate with us. Your love, support, and presence mean the world to us, and we are so grateful to have you in our lives. And speaking of special, let me tell you a little bit about my bride. [Bride's name], you are the love of my life, my best friend, and my partner in all of life's adventures. From the moment I met you, I knew you were the one for me. You light up my world, and I am forever grateful for the day you walked into my life.I remember the first time I saw you, [Bride's name], it was like time stood still. Your beauty, grace, and kind heart left me speechless. And as we got to know each other, I fell more deeply in love with you with each passing day. From our first date to our first kiss, from our travels around the world to the quiet moments we share at home, every moment with you is a treasure.Today marks the beginning of our new journey together, and I cannot wait to see what the future holds. Thank you all for being here to celebrate with us. Cheers to love, happiness, and a lifetime of unforgettable memories." 2. "Ladies and gentlemen, today is the happiest day of my life. I am standing here as the luckiest man in the world, grateful for the opportunity to marry my soulmate, [Bride's name]. This is a day we will cherish forever, and I want to express my gratitude to everyone who has made it possible.To our family and friends, thank you for your love, support, and presence. Your kindness and generosity mean the world to us, and we are so grateful to have you in our lives. Today is not just about us, it's about all of us, coming together to celebrate love, happiness, and unity. And speaking of love, let me tell you a little bit about my bride. [Bride's name], you are my soulmate, my best friend, and my partner in all things. I cannot imagine my life without you, and I am grateful every day for the love you bring into my world. You inspire me to be a better person, and I am honored to stand here today as your husband.I remember the day we met like it was yesterday. I was drawn to your beauty and your infectious smile. As we got to know each other, I realized that there was so much more to you than just your looks. You are kind, smart, and funny, and I am grateful every day that I get to call you mine. From the first time we said 'I love you' to the moment I proposed, every moment with you has been a blessing.Today marks the beginning of our new journey together, and I vow to love, honor, and cherish her for all eternity. Thank you all for being here to celebrate with us. Let's raise a glass to love, happiness, and a lifetime of unforgettable memories." 3. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I want to start by thanking you all for being here today to celebrate with us. And let me just say, [Bride's name], you look absolutely stunning. Seriously though, thank you all for coming today. We couldn't have done this without you. And to our parents, thank you for all the love, support, and guidance you've given us throughout our lives. You've helped shape us into the people we are today, and we're so grateful for everything you've done.Now, let's talk about the real star of the show - my amazing bride, [Bride's name]. You make me laugh, you make me smile, and you make me happier than I ever thought possible. I'm pretty sure you're the reason why they invented the word 'awesome'. You are my rock, my soulmate, and my everything.We've had some incredible adventures together, from hiking through the mountains to exploring new cities. But some of my favorite memories are the small moments we share at home, like cuddling up on the couch to watch our favorite shows or cooking dinner together. I'm grateful for every moment we spend together, and I'm excited to spend the rest of my life making more memories with you.I just want to say how grateful I am to be marrying [Bride's name]. She is the love of my life, my partner in crime, and my best friend. Together, we're going to conquer the world. So let's raise a glass to love, laughter, and happily ever after. Cheers!" 4. "Dear friends and family, I stand before you today with a heart full of love and gratitude. Today is a special day.I want to take a moment to thank our families for their unwavering support and love. Mom and Dad, thank you for raising me to be the man I am today, and for always being there for me. [Bride's parents], thank you for welcoming me into your family and for raising such an amazing daughter. And to our friends and loved ones, thank you for being here today to celebrate with us. Your love and support mean the world to us. And as I look at my beautiful bride, I know that I've found my forever. [Bride's name], you are the most amazing person I've ever met, and I feel so lucky to call you my wife. You make me a better person every single day, and I promise to love and cherish you for the rest of my life.As we start this new chapter of our lives together, I vow to always be there for you, to support you, and to love you with all my heart. You are my best friend, my soulmate, and my everything. I can't wait to see what the future holds for us. Thank you all for being here to celebrate with us. Let's raise a glass to love, happiness, and forever. Cheers." 5. "Dear family and friends, I feel incredibly lucky to be standing here today as a married man. It's a surreal feeling, knowing that I have found my soulmate and partner for life. Thank you all for joining us in this celebration.I would like to take a moment to thank our parents for their endless love and support. We would not be the people we are today without you. To our friends and family, thank you for traveling from near and far to be here with us. Your presence means the world to us.To my beautiful bride, I can't even put into words how much you mean to me. You are my best friend, my partner, my confidante, and my soulmate. I love you more than words can express, and I'm grateful every day to wake up next to you. You make me a better man, and I promise to spend the rest of my life making you happy.As we start this new chapter in our lives together, I promise to always love, cherish, and support you. I'm excited to see what the future holds for us, and I can't wait to grow old with you. Thank you again to everyone who came out to celebrate with us today. Let's raise a glass to love, laughter, and happily ever after."

• "I'm honored to be here today as the groom. And just between us, I'm pretty sure I won the 'best looking' contest between the bride and I. (pause for laughter)
• "I've heard that a good marriage is like a casserole. It takes both ingredients to make it work, and sometimes it's a little messy, but it's always worth it in the end."
• "As I was writing this speech, I asked my wife what she wanted me to say. She replied, 'just make sure you say I'm always right.' So, there you have it, folks. My wife is always right."
• "I've learned that the key to a successful marriage is to always be honest with your partner. For example, when my wife asks if she looks fat in a dress, I always say, 'of course not, honey, you look beautiful.' (pause for laughter)
• "I never believed in love at first sight, until I met my wife. Of course, she thought I was the waiter when we first met, but that's a story for another time."
• "I want to thank my in-laws for accepting me into their family. I promise to always treat your daughter with love and respect, and to never borrow money from you."
• "I used to think that marriage was like a box of chocolates - you never know what you're going to get. But now I realize that marriage is more like a pizza. Even when it's bad, it's still pretty good." (pause for laughter)
• "I've been told that marriage is a lot like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. But by the end, you're hoping for a club and a spade." (pause for laughter)
• "I never thought I'd be standing here as a married man. I always assumed I'd be the one in the back of the room, catching the bouquet."
• "I want to thank my groomsmen for their support and friendship over the years. You guys are like the brothers I never wanted, but now can't live without."
• "I was a little nervous about giving this speech, but then I remembered that my wife promised not to correct my grammar in public anymore. So, I'm pretty much invincible up here."
• "In closing, I just want to say how grateful I am to have found my soulmate in [bride's name]. She's beautiful, intelligent, and always keeps me on my toes. And now that we're married, I look forward to spending the rest of my life with her, and annoying her in all the best ways possible."
• "Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile."
• "A happy marriage is a long conversation which always seems too short."
• "The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds."
• "Marriage is a journey that begins in forever and ends in never."
• "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."
• "I choose you. And I'll choose you over and over and over. Without pause, without a doubt, in a heartbeat. I'll keep choosing you."
• "Love is not just looking at each other, it's looking in the same direction."
• 8. "Marriage is not about finding a person you can live with, it's about finding the person you can't live without."
• "A happy marriage is a union of two good forgivers."
• "A marriage is not a noun; it's a verb. It isn't something you get. It's the way you love your partner every day."
• "Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner."
• "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."

Your groom wedding speech is an important part of your wedding day. It's a chance for you to express your love and appreciation for your partner, and to thank your family and friends for being a part of your special day. With the help of this complete guide to groom wedding speeches, you should now have all the information you need to prepare and deliver an amazing speech.

Remember to take your time when preparing your speech, and to practice it as much as possible. Try to incorporate personal stories and anecdotes to make your speech more meaningful and memorable. And don't forget to include some jokes and quotes to lighten the mood and show your personality.

Lastly, remember that your wedding day is a celebration of your love and commitment to each other. Don't stress too much about your speech – just speak from the heart and enjoy the moment. Congratulations on your wedding day, and good luck with your speech!

If you're in need of more examples of wedding speeches, the following content may be helpful to you.

Get Inspired: 20+ Maid of Honour Speech Examples and Ideas 2024

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How to Write the Perfect Groom Speech

All you need is 15 minutes to prepare, according to an expert.

Photo by Sarah Folsom Photography

In This Article

When it comes to wedding speeches, there's no rule that says the groom has to give one; generally speaking, the father of the bride, the best man, and the maid of honor are the only people required to grab the microphone—but there's even some flexibility here. That being said, grooms shouldn't shy away from saying a few words during the reception if they feel called to do so. It's a wonderful chance to thank guests for their attendance, family members for their f inancial and emotional support , and wedding vendors for bringing the day to life. Most importantly, it gives you a public platform to thank your partner for making you the happiest person in the room.

"The groom's speech is an opportunity for the groom to express deep gratitude, share personal reflections on the journey to marriage, and set the tone for the celebration ahead," explains Steven Greitzer, CEO and founder of Provenance. These remarks are also special because they allow the groom to have a brief moment to shine—especially for those who have an outgoing and charismatic personality. If you're feeling nervous about the idea of giving a toast , however, here's the good news: Preparing for your speech is surprisingly simple and only requires you to follow a few simple steps.

Meet the Expert

Steven Greitzer is the founder and CEO of  Provenance , an online company that specializes in helping couples (and guests!) write wedding vows and toasts.

Here, we break down Greitzer's top tips for writing and delivering an amazing wedding speech as the groom, including exactly what to say to get everyone clapping, what to avoid, and a few sample speeches to inspire your own.

The Average Length of a Groom Speech

As with all wedding speeches, it's best to keep your remarks short and sweet, only touching upon the main points you want to get across. "A groom's speech should be impactful, but still concise, ideally lasting around three minutes max," explains Greitzer. "This ensures that it complements rather than dominates the flow of the reception, allowing guests to enjoy the other toasts from the night while also saving ample time for eating and dancing."

The ideal time to give the groom speech is right before or right after dinner is served. Be sure to coordinate with your wedding planner to ensure time is allocated for your remarks.

Photo by Getty Images / Design by Brides

The Ultimate Groom Speech Template

If you're feeling like you can't possibly add another task to your pre-wedding to-do list, remember that writing your speech shouldn't take long at all. In fact, it should only take less than 15 minutes to prepare, which is less than the time it takes to watch a rerun of your favorite television show. As for how to write your remarks? Greitzer provides the ultimate template to follow, below.

Start with a warm opening and express gratitude.

In today's modern world, most of your wedding guests are traveling to be part of the big day, so acknowledging their efforts and expressing your gratitude is the best way to open up your speech. "Welcoming your guests warmly sets the tone for the celebration. Start by expressing your heartfelt gratitude to everyone who has come to share this special day with you," says Greitzer. "A simple 'thank you' can create a sense of community and warmth." After all, regardless of how big or small your wedding is, there's a good chance you won't be able to spend quality time with each guest, which means your speech is the perfect opportunity to thank everyone for coming.

You can even use this portion of the speech to highlight specific individuals, "like a grandparent, or a friend who has traveled a great distance," explains Greitzer. "This is also the time to thank your parents, your in-laws, and publicly shout out your vendors—a small thank you goes a long way," he adds.

Take a moment to appreciate your partner.

Your wedding day is about you and your partner coming together, so you'd be remiss not to say something sweet about the person you just married. "Even though you've exchanged vows, this moment allows for a more informal and spontaneous expression of your love for your partner. It's a chance to share in real time what you're feeling and to express your gratitude and love in a relaxed and genuine way," shares Greitzer.

Recall one to two memories.

Your groom speech is the perfect opportunity to share a sweet memory from your relationship and give guests a glimpse into the world you and your partner have built together. It also gives you the chance to share any childhood anecdotes that involve close friends and family. However, since you only have three minutes to deliver your toast, stick to one to two core memories that mean the most to you—and don't share anything your partner would object to you saying.

Share any announcements (if applicable).

Whether it’s about the dinner being currently served, the signature cocktail available at the bar, the DJ/band, the schedule for buses, or the overall atmosphere in the reception space, pull out one comment to share aloud related to the evening’s experience, explains Greitzer. This allows everyone to stay informed and "helps the event run smoothly and keeps everyone on the same page," he adds.

End on a fun note and give thanks again.

"Wrapping up your welcome speech with a touch of fun sets a great tone for the rest of the evening. Consider sharing a lighthearted anecdote from your relationship or a funny story from your wedding planning journey ," says Greitzer. "This not only leaves your guests smiling but also creates a smooth transition into the celebration, helping everyone get into the festive spirit."

Then, before officially concluding your speech, give one more round of thanks to everyone involved. Anyone you missed on the first pass—your families, any special friends, and especially your wedding vendors—should be noted here. Finally, ask everyone to raise a toast to your partner, your families, the friends in attendance, and the hardworking staff working to bring the day to life.  

What to Avoid When Writing a Groom Speech

While you should feel empowered to write a speech that's personal to you, there are a few things you shouldn't do when penning your toast. Ahead, Greitzer highlights what to avoid when putting together your groom speech.

• Avoid inappropriate humor.  "Steer clear of jokes that might be considered offensive or inappropriate. Humor is a great way to lighten the mood, but it’s not worth offending your new mother-in-law."
• Avoid overly personal or inside jokes. "Inside jokes that only a few people understand can alienate the rest of your audience. Ensure your speech is inclusive and resonates with everyone."
• Steer clear of exes. "This  should  go without saying, but avoid mentioning past relationships or ex-partners. This would likely be awkward and uncomfortable for everyone, including your partner."

"It’s wise to limit your alcohol intake before giving your speech. We’ve all seen what happens when a speech-giver is too tipsy or drunk, and it’s not pretty," advises Greitzer.

Sample Groom Speeches to Inspire Your Own

Stuck on what to say? Here are two sample speeches Greitzer generated with Provenance.

I promise to make this quick! Thank you all so much for being here to celebrate with us. For those who traveled across the world, or across the 405, we are eternally grateful. Seriously, looking out and seeing all your amazing faces fills me with so much happiness. To our vendors who brought our vision to life, you all are wizards. Appreciate you all so much.

To our families, thank you for all your love and support. You've taught us what it means to be patient, helpful, and resilient. We're so grateful for everything you've done for us, including putting up with our irrational, late-night panicked wedding planning emergency calls.

To our friends, thank you for being our chosen family. Whether it was decorating our apartment with engagement decorations before we got back from vacation, or entertaining our weird game night ideas, we can't wait for more fun times and great memories together.

And most importantly, to [partner’s name]… holy sh*t we’re finally married?! I can’t believe how lucky I am that you answered my double text. While I think you’re beautiful in your messy bun and retainer, you look unbelievable tonight.

To anyone I missed, thank you for making this day so special.

So, let's raise our glasses and toast to love, friendship, and the fun times ahead.

Good evening, everyone.

First of all, thank you all for being here tonight. It's truly amazing to look around and see so many of our friends and family gathered together. Your presence means the world to us, and we're grateful for each and every one of you.

I want to start by thanking my parents. Mom and Dad, your support and love have shaped me into the person I am today. You've always been there for me, guiding me with your wisdom and setting an example of what a loving marriage looks like. I can only hope to follow in your footsteps.

To my new in-laws, thank you for welcoming me into your family with open arms. Your kindness and generosity have made me feel like I've been part of your family for years. I'm excited to create many more memories together.

To my groomsmen, thank you for standing by my side today and throughout my life. Each of you has played a significant role in my journey, and I'm honored to have you here. Your friendship has been a constant source of strength and laughter.

And now, to my beautiful wife/husband/partner. [Name], I feel like the luckiest man in the world to be standing here with you. From the moment we met in that little coffee shop on Valencia Street, I knew there was something special about you. Your kindness, intelligence, and passion for life inspire me every day. You make me a better person, and I am so grateful for your love and partnership. I promise to support you, laugh with you, and love you unconditionally for the rest of our lives.

[Wedding location] has always been a special place for us, filled with memories of our adventures together. From exploring [Golden Gate Park] to sunset walks along [Ocean Beach], this city has been the backdrop of our love story. And today, surrounded by the people we care about most, we're beginning a new chapter in our favorite city.

So, here's to love, laughter, and a lifetime of happiness. Thank you all for sharing this special day with us. Let's raise a glass to new beginnings and the beautiful journey ahead.

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